If_ihate_u_desreve
Fandoms
Recent works
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Past Lives Are Ours To See by If_ihate_u_desreve
Fandoms: House M.D., Swing Kids (1993), Dead Poets Society (1989), Married To It (1991), Much Ado About Nothing (1993), Tape (2001)
06 May 2025
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Summary
Wilson remembers. Not a lot, but enough to weird him out. He stresses over how House would react if he told him. But it doesn't change much.
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i dont know what to call this one lol by If_ihate_u_desreve
Fandoms: Vinesauce (Video Blogging RPF), SCP Foundation, Video Blogging RPF
23 Aug 2024
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Summary
Around the world, in an SCP facility, there are 3 beings followed by a creature known as “Chat.” They are collectively known as “The Streamers.” These are their files.
aka the scp au I found from another fic.
anyway this is a world where streaming doesn't exist. chat is 4th dimensional and is in the righthand side of the streamers vision 24/7 (unless they're offline) and its like half see through. no one else can see it but the streamer.
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oh god oh no please stop it it hurts by If_ihate_u_desreve
Fandoms: Smosh, Real Person Fiction
21 Jul 2024
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Summary
a collection of unfinished smosh fics from around... 5 ish months ago. like a month or two before shortney became canon (shut up that's the phrase ill use if I want)
Series
- Part 1 of unfinished works
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really bad smut practice i wrote half a year ago by If_ihate_u_desreve
Fandoms: Original Work
21 Jul 2024
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Summary
bad bad bad so bad i swear im sorry lmao. its just the first few lines of dialogue and some scene prep. no real smut. no gender was specified either. school bathroom so technically underage? don't know if I was planning on this being two mystery characters or two actual characters. I'm a mess man.
Series
- Part 2 of unfinished works
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Summary
***FEEL FREE TO USE AS A BASELINE. NO NEED FOR CREDIT FOR THIS FIC SINCE ITS SO UNPOLISHED.***
100% unedited, meaning basically illegible. according to my docs the summary is "there's no way they didn't just dogpile"
Series
- Part 3 of unfinished works
Recent series
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unfinished works by If_ihate_u_desreve
Fandom: Encanto (2021), Original Work, Real Person Fiction, Smosh
21 Jul 2024
Summary
wips in case i, like, die idk
- Words:
- 5,536
- Works:
- 3
Recent bookmarks
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Summary
hailey pegs jay
Series
- Part 9 of upstead sex diary
Bookmarked by If_ihate_u_desreve
17 Sep 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
Can't believe I didn't bookmark this already. I love me some pegging.
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Prompt Challenges by Iburninsideatnight
Fandom: Chicago PD (TV), FBI: International (TV 2021)
20 Oct 2025
- Words:
- 414,185
- Works:
- 10
- Bookmarks:
- 8
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Look so pretty on your knees (candy dripping from your lips) by mi1kc0ffee
Fandoms: Chicago PD (TV)
05 Dec 2022
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Summary
The guy they just questioned is, for obvious reasons, not an option. But they’ve got time while he gathers whatever information he can find, and Jay is fidgeting impatiently at her side, so Erin feels entirely justified in taking her sweet, sweet time in picking out a suitor.
Or, what Erin and Jay were doing for the five hours they were at the sex club in 2x08.
Kinktober day 24: Three or moresome
Series
- Part 24 of mi1kc0ffee's multifandom Kinktober 2022
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Summary
What REALLY happened when Jay and Erin went undercover in the sex club.
Bookmarked by If_ihate_u_desreve
30 Jul 2025
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Summary
“Mr. Halstead, I’m glad you’re awake. Welcome to Creedmore Psychiatric Center. I’m Dr. Wellington. If you feel a little confused after the relocation, that is absolutely normal. For your own and everybody else’s safety, you had to be sedated for the transport.”
Jay wakes up in a psychiatric hospital, not knowing how he got there.
And they tell him, he's been there for the past 15 years.
What is real, and what is not?A Jay Halstead Whump Story