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baby, we're the new romantics by tapestryoftrauma
Fandoms: Hatchetfield Series - Team StarKid
10 Dec 2023
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Summary
Emma had never really thought all that much about romance. That is until a certain dork started coming to Beanies every day with a very specific order--a plain black coffee.
Series
- Part 4 of song prompt drabbles
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 737
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 7
- Kudos:
- 60
- Bookmarks:
- 6
- Hits:
- 321
Bookmarked by Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm
29 Jul 2024
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the world is staged and the script is set (you cannot change the ending) by Danidoesathing
Fandoms: Hatchetfield Universe - Team StarKid
28 Apr 2024
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Summary
Then, above all the noise, a voice pierces through, snickering and giddy like a child flooding an ant hill.
Wanna closer look?
“What?” She asks aloud. The infected are frozen in place over her, stupid show-winning smiles still plastered on their faces, like someone pressed the pause button on the whole thing. The voice giggles, like nails on glass. The sound rattles the inside of Emma’s skull. It leans in close, despite not being here at all, and speaks again. Slowly this time, like she’s a child asking stupid questions.
Do you want a closer look?
Or
The end credits scene of TGWDLM except Blinky makes everything worse
Bookmarked by Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm
29 Jul 2024
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Summary
Richie pulled out his phone, noting the fact that no one had bothered to text him and ask why he wasn’t in school. He would stew in that later, he had more pressing matters on his hands. There was also a notification for an article about some meteor that crashed into the Starlight Theatre last night. He swiped it away, dismissing it as nothing. If it was important, Paul probably would’ve told him. Paul told him everything. He pulled up Paul’s contact, calling him and holding the phone up to his ear.
He waited, and the call rang out.
Weird. Maybe he was busy today.
or:
The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals, but Richie is there.
Series
- Part 5 of starkid oneshots
Bookmarked by Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm
29 Jul 2024
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Summary
“Hermione’s going to Indonesia,” Harry explained to Malfoy, who perked up as if the news implied a well-deserved holiday, “with Percy Weasley.”
Malfoy’s nose scrunched. “Ick. What on earth for?”
Perhaps Malfoy would be good for something after all, Hermione thought hopefully, if only to rub some of the Weasley shine from Harry’s lenses.
“Because,” she said crisply, “apparently it’s impossible for anyone else in the department to understand the exact nuance of Portkeys and therefore it is vital that the head of the department see to it personally.”
Malfoy frowned. “That’s ludicrous. What’s the point of becoming department head if you still have to go off and do work yourself?”
“Exactly!” Hermione said, then faltered. “Wait, no. That’s not–”
“What he means,” Harry cut in, laying a hand on Malfoy’s thigh, “is it’s ridiculous Percy is going when you’re completely capable on your own.”
Malfoy sniffed but heeded the unsubtle squeeze of Harry's hand. “That’s right,” he said after a moment, though his face implied otherwise. Hermione appreciated the attempt.
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Or where Hermione and Percy go to Indonesia.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 17,111
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 71
- Kudos:
- 509
- Bookmarks:
- 109
- Hits:
- 6,433
Bookmarked by Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm
30 Jun 2024
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Summary
Everyone in Hogwarts has heard the rumours about them, but only the two of them know the truth.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,040
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 18
- Kudos:
- 699
- Bookmarks:
- 45
- Hits:
- 6,857
Bookmarked by Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm
29 Jun 2024
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Summary
“Jesus,” he blurted. “What—?”
“Sorry, sorry,” she interrupted, closing her eyes and pressing a hand to her forehead. “I just…sorry, give me a second to clear my head.”
She refused to explain why the first thing he’d seen when entering her mind was a rather vivid recollection of her last masturbation session. How embarrassing. She thought about walking in a forest – the least sexy thing she could think of – and then doubled down by picturing herself in the Quidditch stands at Hogwarts. In the rain. In January.
“Okay.” She exhaled and met his eyes again. “Okay, it’s safe now. Go ahead.”
He looked dubious but raised his wand and spoke the incantation again.
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Or, Hermione can't remember an important piece of intel and so Draco is assigned to help find it.
Series
- Part 1 of Try Not To Come
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,420
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 294
- Kudos:
- 4,976
- Bookmarks:
- 1,066
- Hits:
- 81,143
Bookmarked by Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm
28 Jun 2024
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get up and shake the glitter off your clothes now by friendly_ficus
Fandoms: Critical Role (Web Series)
13 Feb 2024
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Summary
Scanlan wakes up with the world’s worst hangover. Like, worse than the morning after the winter party in Whitestone that he spent getting wasted on peppermint schnapps with Cass de Rolo; worse than the New Year’s Eve he spent trying to outdrink Grog in the name of the nonexistent honor of the Tal’Dorei University Music Department.
There’s a ring on his finger.Bookmarked by Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm
28 Jun 2024
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Summary
Hermione grows up as a maths whiz instead of a bookworm and tests into Arithmancy in her first year. With the help of her friends and Professor Vector, she puts her superhuman spellcrafting skills to good use in the fight against Voldemort.
Series
- Part 1 of Arithmancer-Verse
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 502,157
- Chapters:
- 84/84
- Collections:
- 18
- Comments:
- 1,115
- Kudos:
- 3,995
- Bookmarks:
- 1,108
- Hits:
- 245,396
Bookmarked by Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm
15 Jun 2024
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The Universe has it out for Lila Rossi by MorallyDraconequus for ChaoticNeutral, BroadwayCutie16, DemiGoddess28
Fandoms: Miraculous Ladybug
27 Mar 2025
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Summary
Lila got everything she wanted. She ruled the school. She had beaten her enemies. But most importantly, she won.
With the Ladybug and Black Cat Miraculous in hand, Lila ushered in a new reality, one where she had won in the beginning...
But the universe disagrees. And decided to do something about it.
...
Based on Chaotic Neutral’s Lament Series, BroadwayCutie16's Lila’s Lament and DemiGoddess28’s Your Wish Is My Command. (Loosely)
Note: The fic was fully planned and the first chapter was written prior to season 5 and after Evolution and scenes of Multiplication. Some things may not be compliant with Season 5.
Now with a TV Tropes page!
Bookmarked by Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm
17 May 2024
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Summary
Alya deserves more appreciation.
Bookmarked by Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm
16 May 2024
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Summary
Marinette decides that Ladybug needs to appear more human to the public. Her means of reaching this goal? Starting a video series on the Ladyblog with Chat, featuring Questions of the Week, random challenges, and general shenanigans.
Nothing could possibly go wrong.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 24,973
- Chapters:
- 14/?
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 129
- Kudos:
- 756
- Bookmarks:
- 128
- Hits:
- 13,100
Bookmarked by Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm
16 May 2024
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Summary
Ladybug jumped as a female voice groaned in her ear. “They’ve been at this since we got here,”
“But- it took me ten minutes to cross Paris!”
Mayura just nodded defeatedly, plopping down on a nearby bench. Ladybug hesitantly joined her, gingerly sitting down next to the supervillainess. “So… you’re not going to fight me?”
Mayura shook her head, rubbing her temples. “Currently, no. It’s been a rough day.”
Ladybug looked at the arguing duo, who’s conversation had only gotten more heated, then back at the peacock holder.
“... Want to talk about it?”
Bookmarked by Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm
11 May 2024
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Summary
"I think we need to discuss boundaries," she says, dryly, as he opens the cabinet above her sink.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,315
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 46
- Kudos:
- 1,281
- Bookmarks:
- 136
- Hits:
- 16,525
Bookmarked by Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm
15 Apr 2024
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Summary
This is what happens when a bored AuDHDer with a Hazbin hyperfixation who doesn’t have the motivation to do proper writing for any of their fics goes on an incorrect quote generator.
Bookmarked by Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm
19 Mar 2024
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Mystery Work
Summary
This is part of an ongoing challenge and will be revealed soon!
Bookmarked by Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm
22 Feb 2024
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Summary
So maybe everything didn't work out perfectly for Harry. Still, most of his friends survived, he'd gotten married, and was about to become a father. If only he'd have stayed away from the Veil, he wouldn't have had to go back and do everything AGAIN.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 151,873
- Chapters:
- 50/50
- Collections:
- 206
- Comments:
- 8,398
- Kudos:
- 77,143
- Bookmarks:
- 19,460
- Hits:
- 3,263,137
Bookmarked by Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm
08 Feb 2024
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Tumblr Works by ChaoticNeutral
Fandom: Miraculous Ladybug, Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (Cartoon 2018)
26 May 2024
- Words:
- 48,412
- Works:
- 22
- Bookmarks:
- 175
Bookmarked by Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm
25 Dec 2023
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Summary
In retrospect, perhaps Hawk Moth should have thought this through before messing with people’s feelings, but as an empath-based terrorist, that was supposed to be his MO.
How was he supposed to know it could result in this? Or that teenage girls could be terrifying?
Marinette didn't know why she was in Adrien's arms with the boy of her dreams announcing his love to her. She only knew that she had been in a happy place before reality took a battering ram to it and that whomever was responsible needed to pay.
That poor akuma...
Series
- Part 12 of Tumblr Works
Bookmarked by Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm
25 Dec 2023
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Summary
After losing a patient, everyone reacts differently; Foreman writes charts, Chase does Sudoku, Wilson goes to the movies, and Cameron kisses Greg House. House can't resist telling Wilson; Wilson can't resist putting his oar in; Cameron can't resist her one shot at pinning House down.
Bookmarked by Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm
06 Jul 2023
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Summary
Prompt: "Hermione was a child model. Not the creepy kind that did beauty pageants, but even as a six year old she had an impressive ability to look studious and had her picture in a couple of grade school math texts and some advertisements for healthy foods. It wasn’t an important part of her life and would hardly be worth mentioning if it wasn’t for the fact that Harry was so socially isolated as a child that he developed a crush on the girl in his math book."
I also pulled from this comment: "I really hope this means that when they first meet on the train, Harry recognizes her immediately and gets all adorkable - not that he isn't anyway - and doesn't put up with Ron insulting her."
Bookmarked by Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm
09 May 2023