20 Bookmarks by lithiumAlchemist
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Dirk works as a bodyguard for the chief executive officer of Skaianet inc. In theory, this means he's also his traveling companion, constant shadow, and silent assistant.
In practice, their relationship is a little more complex. Or it is when he wants to help his boss de-stress, anyway.
Bookmarked by lithiumAlchemist
01 Oct 2021
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THE FRECKLED FIEND, EXASPERATED: Why are YOU mad?
YOU, MAD: Im not really mad.
DIRK: Yes you are.
YOU, NOT ACTUALLY MAD ANYMORE: No seriously. Just a jest bro.
DIRK, COMPLYING: ...Fine.It’s awkward. Awkward as most things are when you’re having a chance encounter with an old flame who you've been ghosting for two weeks straight.
Bookmarked by lithiumAlchemist
05 Jun 2021
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"And then there's a customized copy of PONY PALS, a gift to you on your 14th birthday from the slippery Mr. Strider. Each page contains lovingly hand-written commentary on the deeds of this intrepid young horse. Later, about halfway through the book, rather than see the gag through to the bitter end, Strider began pasting over entire pages of original text with his own completely rewritten version of the story, while keeping all the chapter titles. His revision is a tough, emotionally draining read. But it's cathartic, in all the worst ways possible.
He tends to get carried away with his projects."Note: this work is an altered book, and it plays on the physical relationship between the original pages and the edited text. As such, it's presented as a series of images. Reading the images is the only way to get the full experience, but I'm aware that some people can't/don't want to read it that way. So if that's the case, you can skip to chapter 13, which is a text-only version of the story, including rough descriptions of the most important illustrations.
Originally posted on detective-pony.tumblr.com- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 40,809
- Chapters:
- 13/13
- Comments:
- 585
- Kudos:
- 3,918
- Bookmarks:
- 1,354
- Hits:
- 186,966
Bookmarked by lithiumAlchemist
21 May 2021
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AO3 is great, but can it run Doom? Of course!!
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dirk is a horse and jake slaps his ass, based on the scene in bravestarr where that happens by purkka
Fandoms: Homestuck, BraveStarr (Cartoon)
08 May 2021
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I think the title explains it pretty well. I will not elaborate on this weird alternate universe where Jake and Dirk replace the main characters of BraveStarr.
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Join Dirk Strider in his room on the Theseus for a peek into.... uh... let's call it his "creative process." There's gay pining, ontological doublethink, an uncomfortable truth about Michelangelo's statue of David, a touch of extremely hypocritical art advice, and a really intense minute there where he gets entirely distracted by the meta-real existence (or lack thereof) of Jake English's left hand. It's fine. Don't worry about it.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,941
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 13
- Kudos:
- 59
- Bookmarks:
- 14
- Hits:
- 552
Bookmarked by lithiumAlchemist
15 Jan 2021
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There's no happy ending for people like us. We exist to be misery lit.
(Part of the DirkJake Big Bang 2021, with artwork by @mayceart)
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“It’s just… I can’t remember the last time I felt so at peace, I guess. It was such a lovely jaunt with Jade, and instead of being all torn up about coming home, I feel even better, now. It’s actually been a real while and a half since I felt… bad, you know? Like actually bad.”
You don’t have much in the way of emotional permanence about that sort of thing. Surely it was months ago, when you were staring gloomily at the bottoms of bottles like the world’s most up-his-own-ass useless overdramatic dilettante. Did it even really happen, if it all, in hindsight, just seems like a dumb pantomime of misery to get attention? A successful dumb pantomime of misery to get attention, mind you, you definitely got it, and a boyfriend to boot. Was it ever really as atrocious and apocalyptic and unsurvivable as it seemed?
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Bookmarked by lithiumAlchemist
08 Jan 2021
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“Why do we keep fucking doing this? This is obviously fucking you over. It never works. We keep doing this. It keeps happening.”
“What else is there for me?” you say, very quietly. “In this whole world, Dirk, what else is there?”
Series
Bookmarked by lithiumAlchemist
08 Jan 2021
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Your name is TEREZI PYROPE.
You have been searching the depths of the FURTHEST RING for CHILDHOOD BEST FRIEND, PRETEENHOOD NEMESIS, TEEN SWEETDIAMOND, and POSSIBLE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE, VRISKA SERKET, for what may or may not have been THREE MONTHS.
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Near the start of her search for Vriska, Terezi is offered a choice.
Bookmarked by lithiumAlchemist
16 Dec 2020
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Gold, White and Red by orphan_account
Fandoms: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
18 May 2020
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There were parties every night for a week, Bright Moon to the Fright Zone was lit up dusk till dawn with music and food spilling into the streets. Glimmer had fussed over logistics at first, worrying that the tail end of a rebellion wasn’t really the time for excess until someone had informed them that every crop had sprouted all at once, everywhere.
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They build a magic house together.
Bookmarked by lithiumAlchemist
19 Nov 2020
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Dirk Strider wakes up back in post-diluvian Houston and immediately splinters himself. Or not.
No one is happy about this.
Series
- Part 1 of dualshock desertbloom
Bookmarked by lithiumAlchemist
19 Nov 2020
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For once in his life John Egbert thinks hard about gender.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,662
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 57
- Kudos:
- 532
- Bookmarks:
- 65
- Hits:
- 5,152
Bookmarked by lithiumAlchemist
26 Oct 2020
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A Tallied List of Various Occasions in Which Jake English Encountered the Elusive Smile Belonging to One Dirk Strider by Rikudera
Fandoms: Homestuck
28 Jan 2016
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Jake English, explorer extraordinaire, tracks down the most unique treasure of all: a nerd in pointy sunglasses.
Bookmarked by lithiumAlchemist
16 Sep 2020
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Jake English waking up sore and alone on a cold floor is not a strange occurrence for him as of late. The ethereal beam of light and sluggishly churning floor is new, but he's woken up in stranger places.
If circumstances were better he'd probably have something shocked and relevant to say about this strange landscape he's found himself in, but circumstances are in fact legendarily shit right now.
(A comic fic where Jake English gets rights)
Bookmarked by lithiumAlchemist
21 Aug 2020
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Ever think about how Dirk Strider got full narrative awareness of the fanfics where he's the big scary hunk in charge and went "i can do that" when he wasn't, in fact, able to do that? i do. i think about that.
Bookmarked by lithiumAlchemist
24 Jul 2020
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Where Johnny goes, the Devil follows; where Johnny goes, the Devil is already there.
Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 32,602
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Collections:
- 4
- Comments:
- 987
- Kudos:
- 7,533
- Bookmarks:
- 2,697
- Hits:
- 124,281
Bookmarked by lithiumAlchemist
01 Jul 2020
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Bluegrass Covers of the Song of Solomon by notbecauseofvictories
Fandoms: Devil Went Down to Georgia - Charlie Daniels Band (Song)
04 Jan 2020
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A man went down to the crossroads looking for forgiveness, God, and the blues—not in that particular order—and found the Devil instead. So the Devil tuned his guitar and made him the best bluesman in the world, and all it cost was his soul, which was taking up too much room inside him anyway.
(Other times, the man at the crossroads isn't looking for God at all.)
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Bookmarked by lithiumAlchemist
01 Jul 2020
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You don’t pity him. It would be senseless to pity him, like pitying a storm or a mountain or God.
Series
Bookmarked by lithiumAlchemist
29 May 2020
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Bookmarked by lithiumAlchemist
29 May 2020