1 - 20 of 106 Bookmarks by onepanic_boy
Navigation
List of Bookmarks
-
to have & to holler by badmetaphors
Fandoms: Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
21 Feb 2026
Tags
Summary
Two years of playing together, and it still hit him every time. The casualness of it. My husband. Said out loud, in public. After years of hiding—stolen moments in hotel rooms, careful distance in public, the constant exhausting performance of just teammates, just rivals, nothing to see here—now Ilya could say it like it was nothing. Like it was easy, like it was the most natural thing in the world.
Because it was. Finally.
In which Ilya Hollander-Rozanov cannot shut up about his husband. (Subtitled: No one asked, Ilya. Ilya. No one asked.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,527
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 394
- Kudos:
- 12,670
- Bookmarks:
- 3,377
- Hits:
- 148,604
Bookmarked by onepanic_boy
24 Jul 2026
-
i will choose you by whateveridk
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
21 Jul 2026
Tags
Summary
“I’m sorry,” Shane whispers against Ilya’s hair. “I’m so, so sorry. I didn’t—”
Shane cuts himself off with a faint stutter in his breath that Ilya feels in his own chest.
“Please,” Ilya begs, but he isn’t sure what he is even asking for.
He wants Shane to leave. He wants Shane to stay. He wants Shane to hold him and never let go.
Ilya feels Shane’s fingers fist in his curls, holding tight as if Ilya could ever bring himself to pull away.
Shane doesn’t know that Ilya could never, that he cannot fathom turning his back to take even one step away from him.
All he can do is push Shane away, make him walk first, and pick up the pieces left behind.
Or an alternative to that fight from the long game, but instead of Shane leaving as Ilya asks, they actually talk it out
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 34,686
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Comments:
- 429
- Kudos:
- 5,277
- Bookmarks:
- 1,311
- Hits:
- 66,417
Bookmarked by onepanic_boy
24 Jul 2026
-
Tags
Summary
The chain is new, but this is undoubtedly his necklace. His mothers necklace.
Skipping his fingers greedily along the chain, Ilya hurries to put it on, fumbling with the strange clasp until he hears a satisfying click of it locking in place. The weight is more than he’s used to, sits heavy on his skin where the previous one had danced and moved with him.
It could feel cloying, choking; instead, it offers reassurance.
I’m here. Not lost. Still here.
His chest heaves with another sob, and Ilya darts into the bathroom; he needs a mirror, he needs to see-
The thicker chain, new and sparkling, glimmers even in the shitty hotel bathroom lighting.
OR
Ilya loses his necklace, and it almost costs him Shane too.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,805
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 255
- Kudos:
- 4,228
- Bookmarks:
- 992
- Hits:
- 37,201
Bookmarked by onepanic_boy
22 Jul 2026
-
Tags
Summary
Hayden wanted to apologize but wasn’t even sure what to apologize for. “If you’re so embarrassed about your choice of boyfriend, maybe get a better one?”
It wasn’t any worse than anything Hayden had said before. In fact, it was probably fairly tame as far as insults went, but it didn’t matter. Hayden could see the moment something inside of Shane detonated. One minute Shane was standing only a handful of feet away, his suit jacket clutched in his hands, and the next the jacket was dropped to the floor in a heap, and Shane’s hands were fisted in Hayden’s shirt, his back slamming against the wall.
Holy fuck, he thought. Shane is going to fucking hit me.
-
or, Hayden makes one too many shitty comments about Rozanov and Shane finally snaps. And while he never actually lands a blow on his best friend, the defeated way he talks about ending their friendship has Hayden rattled. After the Centaurs plane makes an emergency landing, Hayden knows he needs to do everything in his power to make it up to his best friend, with Jackie's help of course.
Series
- Part 1 of one thing (aka TLG rewrites)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 31,900
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Comments:
- 256
- Kudos:
- 5,415
- Bookmarks:
- 1,295
- Hits:
- 55,828
Bookmarked by onepanic_boy
19 Jul 2026
-
drawn in by strange_ghost
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
12 Jul 2026
Tags
Summary
"He saw the corners of Ilya's lips curve up ever so slightly in that infuriating, tiny hint of a smile. “Goodbye, Shane Hollander.”
Shane could only ogle as Ilya walked away. Fuck. His ass was fat. This was so bad.
Shane Hollander, star athlete, D1 hockey team captain, campus heartthrob, was being completely undone by a brooding Slavic art major that he would probably crawl on his fucking knees and bark for."
--
Shane is ready for another boring semester where he has to pretend like he cares about anything other than hockey. Until he sits down next to a mysterious Russian art student who also happens to be the hottest guy Shane has ever seen.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 29,093
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Comments:
- 1,733
- Kudos:
- 17,096
- Bookmarks:
- 5,311
- Hits:
- 203,404
Bookmarked by onepanic_boy
19 Jul 2026
-
a drag path, etched in the surface by justhockey
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
09 Jan 2026
Tags
Summary
It kind of looks like junk, at first. Just a random collection of items, like the lost property box at the arena for things the cleaners find after games. But Shane quickly realises that the collection isn’t random at all.
No, this is a box of memories.
Ilya’s memories of Shane.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,292
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 425
- Kudos:
- 6,468
- Bookmarks:
- 1,378
- Hits:
- 44,244
Bookmarked by onepanic_boy
17 Jul 2026
-
we only know the love we’re shown by justhockey
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
25 May 2026
Tags
Summary
Ilya has always known Shane could do better than him. It shouldn’t come as a surprise that he’s finally found it.
Found someone else.
Because that’s what this is, isn’t it?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,913
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 576
- Kudos:
- 9,472
- Bookmarks:
- 1,760
- Hits:
- 71,852
Bookmarked by onepanic_boy
15 Jul 2026
-
honey, tell me, are you good at staying still? by justhockey
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
07 Jun 2026
Tags
Summary
Life feels so chaotic for Shane sometimes, with all the loud noises and the unwritten rules he’s expected to follow, even though no one ever taught them to him. It’s why the bookstore feels more like home to him than anywhere else in Boston. It doesn’t ask Shane to be anything other than himself. Doesn’t ask for any more than he can give.
He can just exist here.
Shane likes slow, likes taking his time. And Ilya - without saying or doing anything in particular - makes Shane feel like that’s okay. Like he isn’t doing anything wrong by standing still sometimes.
(Or, Shane works in a bookstore, Ilya plays hockey, and they both go to the same college. They fall in love in every universe.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 24,218
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 4
- Comments:
- 818
- Kudos:
- 6,448
- Bookmarks:
- 1,966
- Hits:
- 67,640
Bookmarked by onepanic_boy
15 Jul 2026
-
the way you love me by justhockey
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
11 Jul 2026
Tags
Summary
Ilya knows that no one loves the same version of a person; his Shane is different to Yuna’s Shane, who is different to David’s Shane, who is different to J.J., or Rose, or Hayden’s Shane. And while Ilya knows he’d fall in love with every single version, he’s happy he gets this one. Happy he gets the Shane who lets himself be trusting, and vulnerable, and honest.
It makes Ilya wish he could have loved Shane earlier - makes him wish he could have known him longer. But he’s just glad he gets to do it now, here, like this.
(Or, four times people are surprised by Shane’s clinginess, and one time they completely expect it.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8,684
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 5
- Comments:
- 772
- Kudos:
- 12,765
- Bookmarks:
- 2,658
- Hits:
- 99,151
Bookmarked by onepanic_boy
15 Jul 2026
-
Tags
Summary
“Hollander,” Ilya murmured gently. “Bath is ready.”
Shane cracked his eyes open, staring dumbly at the burly Russian hovering over him where he was still laying in bed.
“…bath?” He croaked, voice raspy with disuse.
“Mm. I ran you a bath. It will make you feel better before you go to sleep tonight. Will help with your sore muscles.”
Shane asks Ilya to fuck him gently during one of their regular hookups, badly bruised from their game. Ilya runs him a bath afterwards, and they fall secretly and desperately in love that way, through whispered confessions and late night conversations while Shane soaks, and Ilya quietly observes him.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 22,889
- Chapters:
- 2/3
- Comments:
- 341
- Kudos:
- 2,919
- Bookmarks:
- 970
- Hits:
- 60,682
Bookmarked by onepanic_boy
13 Jul 2026
-
Tags
Summary
“Why are you so sure he’ll reject you? He was already fucking in love with you, Roz, literally all of us knew it, it was clear just from how he looked at his fucking phone—”
“That was— That was a fucking miracle, Pike. Miracles don’t happen twice.”
---
shane doesn't remember his relationship with ilya after the hit. ilya was going to break up with him anyway.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,412
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 359
- Kudos:
- 7,721
- Bookmarks:
- 1,349
- Hits:
- 48,748
Bookmarked by onepanic_boy
25 Jun 2026
-
blessed be the boys time can't capture by justhockey
Fandoms: Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
08 Dec 2025
Tags
Summary
They had so many years of love and joy, so many tender, vulnerable moments that they were never allowed to capture - never allowed to keep.
“We don’t have any pictures together, Ilya,” Shane repeats, his voice frantic and desperate and almost pleading. “We’ve loved each other for a decade and all we have to show for it is-“
“-us, Shane. We have us to show for it. Our life, our love, our home that we have built together.”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,474
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 239
- Kudos:
- 4,632
- Bookmarks:
- 931
- Hits:
- 29,173
Bookmarked by onepanic_boy
24 Jun 2026
-
other forms of intimacy by ultravioletdaydream
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
03 Jan 2026
Tags
Summary
Shane and Ilya have a lot of sex. A lot of hot, intimate, dirty sex. But sometimes they don't. Sometimes, for one reason or another, they find more intimacy in the unexpected moments where their plans to fuck don't work out.
Or:
Shane and Ilya taking care of each other.
• • •
I: Shane Hollander has too much to drink.
II: Ilya Rozanov gets the fucking flu.
III: Shane Hollander suffers an Autistic shutdown.
IV: Ilya Rozanov misses his mother.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 24,140
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Comments:
- 543
- Kudos:
- 8,146
- Bookmarks:
- 1,973
- Hits:
- 97,949
Bookmarked by onepanic_boy
20 Jun 2026
-
Friendship In Retrospect by HH_Arrow
Fandoms: Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
13 Jan 2026
Tags
Summary
Cliff Marleau gets assigned to keep the new Russian rookie out of trouble. Fifteen years later, he gives a speech at Ilya's wedding.
Series
- Part 1 of A Formal Study of the Heart
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 14,275
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 1,918
- Kudos:
- 18,893
- Bookmarks:
- 4,388
- Hits:
- 154,413
Bookmarked by onepanic_boy
16 May 2026
-
Tags
Summary
’’I can’t tell you what you have to do to impress me. It has to be natural. Like, spontaneous. You are the one who should think about it. Five times.”
‘’Five times what?’’
‘’You said you want to know me better. And I said I don’t want to know better the guy who has a new flame every week. So, prove me wrong. Convince me you want more— If you want more. If you are willing to try. If you are not, that’s fine. We’ll be friends, or whatever, like this conversation never happened. But if you want to prove me that you don’t want what you always want… Surprise me. Five times. Think about something without any of my advice. And I’ll promise you a date.’’And, well. Who’s Ilya to not accept a good bet?
Bookmarked by onepanic_boy
15 May 2026
-
(All I Need Is On) The Other Side of the Door by midwestmillie
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
04 Apr 2026
Tags
Summary
“Unlock the door, Hollander.”
Even though Shane couldn’t hear the exact words, he knew what Ilya said. He shook his head.
“Unlock the door, or I will break the glass. Your choice.”
Shane’s eyes widened again and he briefly hung his head as if regretting all of his past life decisions, and Ilya heard the resounding click of the unlock mechanism.
He felt wild, his mind in violent turmoil as he threw open the door and his palm clutched the back of Shane’s head, his fingers finding purchase in the coarse hair. “Are you listening to me?” Shane ducked his head in acknowledgment. “I’m going to call off my driver. You will not move. I am going to sit there-“ he pointed at the empty passenger seat. “-in this boring car of yours and I am going to find out why the fuck you are alone and who the fuck made you cry.”
*************************************************************
Inspired by Shane’s confession in The Long Game (*mini-spoiler*) about his whereabouts after leaving a certain Montreal nightclub in January 2017, Ilya leaves the club shortly after Shane only to find him pulled over on the side of the road, devastated.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,454
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Comments:
- 246
- Kudos:
- 12,917
- Bookmarks:
- 2,323
- Hits:
- 128,654
Bookmarked by onepanic_boy
15 May 2026
-
stag night by amongtheshadows
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
08 May 2026
Tags
Summary
“You invited the team to our house. . . for a bachelor party.”
Ilya pauses before smiling and wincing. “Yes.”
There’s a beat of silence between them. “Ilya, they are going to destroy our house.”
“We don’t know that for sure.” he argues. “Plus, it is for Harris and Troy. We should be the ones to do it.” Ilya shrugs.
“Because we’re gay?”
(shane and ilya host a bachelor party for harris and troy and the whole thing ends up way more chaotic and way more wholesome than expected)
Series
- Part 7 of shane and ilya are (not) co-dependent
Bookmarked by onepanic_boy
10 May 2026
-
when you hold me it holds me together by hollidayparty
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
25 Dec 2025
Tags
Summary
They sat in silence for a few seconds and watched the surf rolling in and out, in and out. Shane eased one knee up and rested his arm across it, watching Ilya out of the corner of his eye with infinite patience.
“You wanna talk about it?” he asked, voice soft enough that the wind almost stole it.
He did want to talk. His chest was full of words. Too full. But the idea of opening all that up? Of watching Shane recoil, or worse, watching him care? It was unbearable. The thought of being comforted by Shane, of feeling that warmth and knowing he couldn’t keep it, nearly crushed him.
Ilya kept his eyes on the water and his jaw tight.
Shane reached out slowly and carefully and let the tip of one finger trace the outside of Ilya’s forearm. Just a whisper of contact. A question, not a demand.
Ilya looked at him. Shane gave a small tilt of his hand, beckoning him closer.
“Come here.”
****
A deviation from the All-Star weekend in Tampa:
Instead of finding Shane on the bench, it’s Ilya alone with his ghosts and falling apart in ways he never lets anyone see.
Until Shane sits beside him.
Series
- Part 1 of hollanov one-shots & shorties
Bookmarked by onepanic_boy
01 May 2026
-
Tags
Summary
“You lie to yourself, Hollander. Not to me.”
“What, because you know me so well?”
“Yes. I do. Don’t I?”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,346
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 344
- Kudos:
- 10,720
- Bookmarks:
- 2,935
- Hits:
- 124,500
Bookmarked by onepanic_boy
01 May 2026
-
a sound is still a sound around no one by dykeries
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
12 Feb 2026
Tags
Summary
Shane lifts one eyelid again to look at Rozanov. His eyes are red-rimmed. Like he’s been crying. “Why…why aren’t you in Boston?”
Rozanov’s brow furrows. “Why would I be in Boston?”
“You, you’re captain. Raiders. Boston.”
The room is silent except for the beeping of monitors.
In 2023, Shane takes a bad hit on the ice. When he wakes up, the last thing he remembers is a tuna melt.
There’s a lot to get used to.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 43,230
- Chapters:
- 9/9
- Comments:
- 3,484
- Kudos:
- 34,672
- Bookmarks:
- 8,962
- Hits:
- 527,900
Bookmarked by onepanic_boy
25 Apr 2026