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it's not murder, it's research and waste disposal by mangotangerine
Fandoms: Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon)
21 May 2026
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Summary
Vox relocates from New Orleans and finds himself a new home, new hunting grounds, and most importantly: Alastor, the biggest crush of his life. Unfortunately, the man fucking hates him. His attempts to turn Alastor’s simmering hatred to begrudging affection fail entirely, until a nighttime middle-of-the-swamp meet-weird (and some erotic knifeplay) over a corpse.
Follow two serial killers figuring out what kind of life they can build together. They meet each other's families, navigate the question of how Vox has evaded consequences for so long, and settle into something real. Underneath the domesticity, Alastor carries a 20-year-old score to settle, and when he finally gets the info he's been waiting for, he drags Vox into it with him.
A story of revenge, family drama, a soul-binding, uncovering each other’s closely-held pasts, through the slow and painful work of two people learning to be known, and eventually toward the question neither of them thought they'd answer: what does a future look like for people who never planned to have one?
OR: Two serial killers fall in love and fuck and it’s actually really deep, somehow. (You can easily skip the weird shit, it’s tagged and indicated in-chapter)
Series
- Part 1 of it's not murder in every universe, sometimes it's just research and waste disposal
- Part 1 of it's not murder | canon
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 339,464
- Chapters:
- 58/58
- Comments:
- 2,257
- Kudos:
- 2,585
- Bookmarks:
- 449
- Hits:
- 120,383
Bookmarked by rab_cassettes
05 May 2026
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Summary
When Remus is away visiting his family Regulus has the idea to get James all needy and then send his puppy dog boyfriend down the hall into his brothers bedroom so that Sirius isn't so lonely.
this idea came to me and I swear I blacked out and then all the sudden this was in front of me :)
Series
- Part 1 of Undisclosed Desires
Bookmarked by rab_cassettes
13 Feb 2026
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Summary
“As for your earlier question. You’re a pureblood—”
“Yes, so you’ve said.”
Regulus scowls. “Don’t interrupt me. Apart from that, you’re also healthy, athletic, and magically gifted. These are all the genetic qualities I’m looking for in the father of my child.”
“I also have all of my teeth and no cavities if you want to check,” James scoffs.
“What? Why would I want to check that?”
“Isn’t that what you do with a breeding stud?”***
To exact vengeance on his parents, Regulus decides to conceive a child with James Potter. It’s a brilliant plan that’s bound to succeed; surely, nothing can possibly go wrong there except for one thing. Regulus doesn’t count on gaining a co-parent with benefits. Or falling in love.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 159,379
- Chapters:
- 32/32
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 2,717
- Kudos:
- 3,680
- Bookmarks:
- 916
- Hits:
- 150,636
Bookmarked by rab_cassettes
10 Mar 2025
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Summary
Ten years ago, Remus broke the heart of his best friend. Just before that friend became world-renowned pop icon, Sirius Black. Now, his other best friends are having a baby, and they've named both Remus and Sirius the godfather of their unborn child as some convoluted plot to get them back together. They pretend it doesn't work while simultaneously, and secretly, finding their way back to one another.
FUN TROPES FEATURED IN THIS FIC!!
- describing flavors of chocolate in an excessively sexual manner
- philosophical discussion of why Hozier is love-making music
- an appreciation of thighs and the way they stretch tattered denim
- cigarettes: terrible but what a fucking visual image
- crashing a golf cart and nearly killing all your friends at once
- Regulus Black and the art of affectionate insults
- autobiographical clause about sobbing to Don Henley in the car
- PREMATURE GREY HAIR: YES, THEY'RE 28/29, I KNOW- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 88,278
- Chapters:
- 9/9
- Collections:
- 14
- Comments:
- 1,279
- Kudos:
- 6,165
- Bookmarks:
- 2,012
- Hits:
- 171,669
Bookmarked by rab_cassettes
06 Feb 2025
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From Sirius Black's Baby Brother to Slytherin's Most Desired by stroodleberryfields
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
15 Sep 2025
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Summary
Regulus makes a bet with Barty and Evan and loses.
The wager? It involves long legs and slutty waists. A week of short skirts and the wide eyes of horny teen boys changes the trajectory of Regulus's life forever.Takes place in the beginning of his sixth year. For the sake of the fic, Marauders and Skittles are in the same year and Sirius and Regulus are Irish twins (less than a year age difference).
Or: Someone close James Potter's mouth before he catches flies drooling over baby Black's bare legs.
Bookmarked by rab_cassettes
29 Jan 2025
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Summary
Pro gamer DearlyProngs has it all - the skills, the fame, and the adoring fans. Until little king's provocative stream about "real gaming talent" goes viral, and suddenly James can't stop watching the infuriating (and infuriatingly attractive) variety streamer who seems determined to get under his skin.
Regulus knows exactly what he's doing with his carefully curated stream persona, all-star motifs, and strategic wardrobe malfunctions, complete with that damn snake tattoo that keeps drawing James's eyes. It's all fun and games until their sponsors force them to collaborate, and suddenly, maintaining the rivalry becomes a lot harder than falling into something else entirely.
But in an industry where everything is content, and everyone is watching, keeping anything private might be the hardest game of all.
(or: in which LittleKing is a thirst trap streamer with actual talent, DearlyProngs can't stop watching his "enemy's" streams at 3 AM, TheWolfStar runs a cozy gaming channel, the Rosier twins meddle from their separate corners of the internet, and everyone's business is trending on Twitter).
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 50,457
- Chapters:
- 30/30
- Comments:
- 198
- Kudos:
- 515
- Bookmarks:
- 131
- Hits:
- 17,385
Bookmarked by rab_cassettes
20 Jan 2025
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Summary
But Barty thinks, and we don’t need to go into the reasoning for why his mind is suddenly thinking such things as Evan lets go of his hand and sits next to him, that they would not be a star and the moon.
The two idiots cooing at one another across the way have that covered—great.
He’s pretty sure he heard Sirius comparing James to the sun the other weekend, pissed off vodka cranberries, and crying. So that’s taken as well. Barty is running out of metaphors as Evan sits and bumps his hip with his own, getting him to scoot further over in his chair.
Both of them are sitting on one side of the table now. Evan takes a cherry between his teeth, bites it from the stem, and flicks the stem onto the table. It lands right next to Barty’s keys and wallet, just touching.
He looks over and meets Barty’s eye.
They're not the sun and moon or stars in the night sky; Barty and Evan are both black holes.
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rosekiller, modern meet-cute.Series
- Part 1 of THE PARKING LOT
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 78,099
- Chapters:
- 9/9
- Comments:
- 344
- Kudos:
- 1,798
- Bookmarks:
- 587
- Hits:
- 62,441
Bookmarked by rab_cassettes
22 Dec 2024
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Summary
Ten years after the Battle of Hogwarts, Professor Regulus Black is tasked with a job more difficult than anything he experienced during the war.
Avoiding falling in love with James Potter all over again. And teaching his son, Harry Potter, how to brew a proper potion.
A Jegulus-centric tale and sequel to Like Real People Do
Series
- Part 2 of Like Real People Do: Tales of Jegulus
Bookmarked by rab_cassettes
04 Sep 2024
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Summary
Regulus dies in the cave, fully willing and accepting of his fate, but someone cannot let him go, and maybe he doesn't want to let go either.
Or
Sirius is determined to bring Regulus back and end the war which has taken so much from them.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 164,787
- Chapters:
- 32/32
- Comments:
- 111
- Kudos:
- 450
- Bookmarks:
- 120
- Hits:
- 19,614
Bookmarked by rab_cassettes
02 Sep 2024
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Summary
Remus Lupin believed he must have the most active imagination ever, until his mother gives him a life changing letter. Peter Pettigrew is used to fading into the background, with all the attention his older sisters require. James Potter has heard stories of Hogwarts his entire life, and can't wait to explore the place that shaped his father and mother. Sirius Black, heir to the Noble and Honorable House of Black, is ready to do whatever is required to shake of his family's reputation and build his own.
This story has been brewing in my mind and spilling onto my crinkled notebook pages for so long now, I'm thrilled to finally share! Please don't repost anywhere else.
Series
- Part 1 of Bring the Boys Home
Bookmarked by rab_cassettes
31 Aug 2024
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Summary
Sirius wasn't sure if Regulus would even be willing to help, but he wasn't sure about much these days, always second-guessing and living on shots in the dark.
However, there were two things Sirius felt almost certain about.
One. Regulus was strong. After all, he had made it through the same hell he had
And two. The one person Regulus could never refuse to help was James Potter.Now James was missing and Sirius needed another hunter to help.
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Saving people, hunting things, (spitting on the family business) that's what Sirius has done since running away at sixteen. He doesn't need anything besides his mate James and his precious car. But then James goes missing on a hunt and Sirius does the only reasonable thing: track down his estranged brother and beg him for help.
A long story with Sirius as Dean Winchester and Regulus as Sam Winchester and an unexpected Remus Lupin - but I take liberties, a lot.
Bookmarked by rab_cassettes
20 Aug 2024
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Public Bookmark 139
Mystery Work
Part of 123
Summary
This is part of an ongoing challenge and will be revealed soon!
Bookmarked by rab_cassettes
20 Aug 2024
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Bookmarked by rab_cassettes
28 Jul 2024
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The Chaotic Consequences of Kinky Covenants by surpriserougecerise
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
26 Jul 2024
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Summary
Sirius' hair was soft against Remus' scarred skin and his perfectly arched eyebrows had settled in a frown.
“Yes, as in sex with people. I want to experiment more regarding having sex with people, I haven’t had sex with before, okay!” He huffed in frustration.
Remus raised his eyebrows. Not exactly baffled, but still a little surprised. Although very pleasantly.
“So,” Remus concluded, just to make sure he had understood correctly. “You want to fuck guys?”
or
Sirius get's an interest in branching out, but before doing so, wants to make sure he's prepared. Who could be better to do that with than his openly bisexual childhood best friend?
Remus agrees to it, needing a little distraction from the horrors of having to apply for a teacher position at Hogwarts as a werewolf, and so the kinky covenant is made. But what could go wrong? They're such good friends and not even a little sex could change that, right?Bookmarked by rab_cassettes
28 Jul 2024
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Summary
“Wait - do you mean you and Barty?”
“Yeah, of course, we’ve suggested it like a dozen times by now,” Evan said with a soft chuckle.
“Just sex?” Remus asked.
Evan nodded, “Not interested in dating you.”
“Well, then, why the fuck not?”
After a year of propositioning, Remus finally gives Barty & Evan a chance. It's not remotely what Evan expected.
Series
- Part 9 of Heart of the Lion
Bookmarked by rab_cassettes
12 Jul 2024
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Summary
"Is he really okay?" Regulus whispered finally. So softly it was barely there.
James wasn't surprised that he had asked. The other night was different Regulus was drunk and pissed off that's why he reacted the way that he did. But right now In the dark alone and away from prying eyes, he let himself be the slightest bit vulnerable. Just the slightest.
"Yes and no," James answered honestly.
Regulus nodded, seeming to take that answer and understand it. When James thought he might leave Regulus did something surprising and sat back down again. "I didn't mean what I said the other night. I do care."
James's eyes widened shocked regulus admitted he had feelings, shocked he cared. Shocked he admitted he cared. Regulus didn’t show emotions.
OR
After Sirius leaves Regulus is forced by his family to spy on the Potter family or else they will hurt Sirius. Regulus isn’t expecting to care about the Potters and he’s certainly not expecting to start hooking up with the bane of his existence James bloody Potter but what can you do?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 121,864
- Chapters:
- 19/?
- Comments:
- 167
- Kudos:
- 1,781
- Bookmarks:
- 476
- Hits:
- 66,234
Bookmarked by rab_cassettes
09 Jul 2024
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Summary
James is navigating life post-divorce, balancing his love for his son Harry. One day, James meets Regulus Black, Harry's understanding and strikingly handsome teacher. He doesn't suspect that Rreg is his best friend's brother.
Regulus fled his family a few years after Sirius left.
The two haven't seen each other for over ten years and Sirius doesn't know he has a brother.Bookmarked by rab_cassettes
09 Jul 2024
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Bookmarked by rab_cassettes
28 Jun 2024
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Summary
LONG fic charting the marauders' time at Hogwarts (and beyond) from Remus' PoV - diversion from canon in that Remus's father died and he was raised in a children's home, and is a bit rough around the edges. Otherwise canon-compliant.
1971 - 1995This IS a wolfstar fic, but incredibly slow burn. Literally years. Long build up but worth it I promise!
PLEASE DO NOT COPY TO WATTPAD. SERIOUSLY, WHY??
Spotify playlist:
https://open.spotify.com/user/htl2006/playlist/3z2NbLq2IVGG0NICBqsN2D?si=Liyl_JKJSx2RUqks3p50kg(Compiled by amazing reader, JustAnotherPerson)
DISCLAIMER: I do not support JK Rowling's disgusting transphobic views.
NOTE: I AM NO LONGER READING OR REPLYING TO COMMENTS ON THIS FIC
Series
- Part 1 of All the Young Dudes
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 526,969
- Chapters:
- 188/188
- Comments:
- 50,101
- Kudos:
- 319,280
- Bookmarks:
- 56,507
- Hits:
- 20,514,820
Bookmarked by rab_cassettes
24 Apr 2024
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Summary
It's been months since the fall semester of Kaveh's final year at the Akademiya began. It was all going swimmingly...
That was until a certain silver-haired junior barged into his life, flipping the blonde's world on its axis and making him fall for the last man he would have expected.
Series
- Part 1 of Everything They Wanted (Loser AU)
Bookmarked by rab_cassettes
19 Apr 2024