1 - 20 of 390 Bookmarks by unavoidablysarcastic
Navigation
List of Bookmarks
-
Tags
Summary
“You’re to be sent on a special mission, Tartaglia.”
The young man’s eyes gleamed in interest. “How special?” He asked as he wiped the blood off his daggers.
His superior grinned. “Special enough to put your name in Snezhnaya’s history books.”
—
In which the Archon War ravaged the land of Liyue and to ensure the people’s survival, the God of Geo established the Harvester Contract: One bride per village, every year, in exchange for protection and a good harvest.
Or: Childe is sent on an undercover mission to kill the Geo Archon, but things don’t go as planned.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 83,170
- Chapters:
- 26/?
- Collections:
- 4
- Comments:
- 2,590
- Kudos:
- 11,823
- Bookmarks:
- 1,506
- Hits:
- 282,393
Bookmarked by unavoidablysarcastic
03 Oct 2025
-
Tags
Summary
Kaveh scoffs. “Oh, please! Us as best friends? Nobody would believe it. You might as well have us pretend to be lovers!”
He waits for Tighnari and Cyno to roll their eyes or shake their heads or say, Haha, good one, Kaveh, we should get you a stand-up comedy show in addition to all your amazing gigs. He doesn’t expect them to exchange a serious look.
To convince the public that they don’t hate each other, famous actors Kaveh and Alhaitham pretend to be in a relationship. Too bad they actually hate each other.
At least, Kaveh thinks they do.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 27,086
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 333
- Kudos:
- 3,648
- Bookmarks:
- 872
- Hits:
- 31,587
Bookmarked by unavoidablysarcastic
18 Sep 2025
-
Tags
Summary
After the events of "are we falling or flying", Jamie and Roy must learn to navigate life together - a new season, new responsibilities, and new feelings.
Series
Bookmarked by unavoidablysarcastic
27 Aug 2025
-
Tags
Summary
"What the fuck," Doakes muttered, taking a step back. "You're a goddamned—"
"Omega," Dexter said, like it was the most normal thing in the world. Completely ignoring that he was one-hundred percent a beta on paper.
Getting (forcefully) chemically modified by one of his victims who was supposed to be on his table might actually be one of the best decisions Dexter has ever made.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 14,177
- Chapters:
- 5/?
- Comments:
- 243
- Kudos:
- 1,201
- Bookmarks:
- 233
- Hits:
- 12,800
Bookmarked by unavoidablysarcastic
15 Aug 2025
-
Tags
Summary
“You were quiet this weekend,” Dani said casually, sipping his coffee, not looking at him. “Too busy for your poor friends, huh?”
Jamie tried not to flinch. “Yeah, erm. Told you. I met someone at the club. Just… didn’t wanna leave that bubble, y’know?”
He kept his eyes on the table, irrationally afraid that Dani would somehow be able to read it off his face, that he’d take one look at Jamie and know.
He should've just said it. Should’ve just mentioned it outright in the car, like, "Hey, by the way, remember that girl I went home with? Yeah, it was Keeley."
He couldn't though. Even if Dani didn’t outright say it was a bad idea to do this again, Jamie’d see it in his face, and he couldn't stand that.
—Jamie and Keeley have a summer fling. It's fine. It doesn't work out. There's no consequences.
...Are there?
—JamieKeeley have a summer fling and end up pregnant. It changes everything, and nothing, at the same time.
Season 3 AU where Jamie and Keeley have a baby and RoyJamie still end up falling in love (and Freak4Freak'ing).
Bookmarked by unavoidablysarcastic
14 Aug 2025
-
Smooth as Water Hitting a Dam by pandaluna
Fandoms: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types
29 May 2024
Tags
Summary
His name was Percy Jackson, and she really, really didn’t like him.
Percy Jackson was a trouble kid. Percy Jackson was the kind of guy who didn’t like reading. Percy Jackson was hotheaded. Percy Jackson was proving to be very unimpressive. Percy Jackson was the type of guy to somehow have a knack for sword fighting. Percy Jackson was the type of guy to meet a girl in an alleyway, get an explanation about the strings connecting people to each other and then… forget her.
Percy Jackson was her soulmate, and she wished that he wasn’t.
---
The Percy Jackson series, but Annabeth and Percy are soulmates. Obviously, I added scenes and didn't write everything that had happened in the book. I'm not that crazy.
(was originally only about the Lightning Thief, and then I added a chapter and decided I really should finish this fic)
Bookmarked by unavoidablysarcastic
30 Jul 2025
-
'cause i'd rather die (than grow old without the best of you) by TheOracleSpeaks
Fandoms: The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan, EPIC - Jorge Rivera-Herrans (Albums), Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types, Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Iliad - Homer, The Odyssey - Homer
30 Jul 2025
Tags
Summary
Phineas grinned wickedly. He closed his fingers around the left-hand vial. “You were a fool, Percy Jackson. I choose this one. Now we drink.”
Percy took the vial on the right. His teeth were chattering. The old man raised his vial. “A toast to the sons of Neptune.”
They both uncorked their vials and drank.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Gorgon's Blood restored all of Percy's memories. Even the ones that were from a different lifetime, thousands of years ago.
or
Percy Jackson is the reincarnation of Penelope while Annabeth Chase is the reincarnation of Odysseus. It changes everything. It changes nothing.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 17,302
- Chapters:
- 5/?
- Comments:
- 154
- Kudos:
- 1,051
- Bookmarks:
- 333
- Hits:
- 14,681
Bookmarked by unavoidablysarcastic
29 Jul 2025
-
Tags
Summary
Roy Kent stopped in front of him. Looked at Jamie, right in his eyes. Time seemed to stop. Jamie opened his mouth, just as he saw Roy Kent open his.
"Absolutely fucking not."
The words hit Jamie like a blow.
No, like a… burn?
Bookmarked by unavoidablysarcastic
15 Jul 2025
-
the epic highs and lows of being a diabetic footballer by SmileHoney
Fandom: Ted Lasso (TV)
06 Jul 2025
Summary
jamie is diagnosed with type one diabetes. it changes everything, and also nothing
- Words:
- 43,636
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 34
Bookmarked by unavoidablysarcastic
15 Jul 2025
-
Tags
Summary
Jamie is one of the returning contestants on the latest season of Lust Conquers All. He thinks taking a break from Keeley and Roy will give him a chance to move on and give them a chance to get back together with him out of the way, but things don't go as planned.
Jamie's not likely to last many weeks while he's rubbing everyone the wrong way by sticking to Roy's strict training regimen and talking about Roy so much that several contestants start to wonder if Jamie has a boyfriend back home.
Meanwhile, Roy's trying to enjoy watching the new season with the yoga mums, but that proves difficult when Jamie talks about him so much that the whole country seems to think that Jamie's in love with him. But there's nothing that Roy can do about it. At least not while he's stuck at home and Jamie's off sequestered without his phone...
(Set during the off-season after season 3)
Bookmarked by unavoidablysarcastic
12 Jul 2025
-
Tags
Summary
In which a publisher wants Roy to write an autobiography, and in his new capacity as Roy's ghostwriter, Trent uncovers all sorts of unexpected things.
Bookmarked by unavoidablysarcastic
10 Jul 2025
-
Summary
welcome to my samjamie bestfriendism agenda :) this is a canon divergent timeline where they bond after jamie has a panic attack at the gala in season one.
- Words:
- 21,603
- Works:
- 4
- Bookmarks:
- 253
Bookmarked by unavoidablysarcastic
08 Jul 2025
-
Tags
Summary
Jamie types for longer this time.
dont worry abt it mate just pls tell the lads im so sorry for getting yous relegated and all and also for just being so awful i really never wanted to hurt anyone
i swear im fixing it now
ive got it all figured out im finally gonna stop fucking everything up
A chill runs down Sam’s spine. He really doesn’t like what that might be implying.
-
or, upon leaving man city, jamie doesn’t take the reality tv offer.
Bookmarked by unavoidablysarcastic
08 Jul 2025
-
if you rewrite your life, may i still play a part? by scarlettroses
Fandoms: Ted Lasso (TV)
28 Oct 2025
Tags
Summary
If he'd stayed a footballer, he doesn't know if he'd have made it to this age. He'd have been fucking miserable, he's rather sure— dealing with Dad, living in the public eye, pushing his body to its limits, never really getting a break. He'd not have found out that he actually is quite smart when he works for it, and that he can make proper friends who don't just follow him around because they think he's the shit. He'd not have found the sense of freedom and independence and normalcy that he's come to enjoy.
Going to uni was the right thing to do, and now he's off to work a job he loves, and he never has to fucking worry about scoring goals ever again. Life is perfect, he's quite sure.
-
in which things are a little different, but some things (like roy kent) always remain.
aka. the au in which jamie is a physiotherapist, and roy is roy.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 38,914
- Chapters:
- 9/?
- Comments:
- 398
- Kudos:
- 1,281
- Bookmarks:
- 336
- Hits:
- 17,773
Bookmarked by unavoidablysarcastic
08 Jul 2025
-
- Words:
- 5,284
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 33
Bookmarked by unavoidablysarcastic
07 Jul 2025
-
Tags
Summary
“Right,” Jamie says, nodding and shaking out his hands again, “okay, so it’s like- I’m straight, but I’m also not, and I’d love to be gay like Colin because it would piss off me dad so much, and if I came out in public that prick might actually have a heart attack, which would serve him dead right, you get me?”
“I- sure,” Trent says, when it becomes clear that Jamie’s waiting for an answer. “Yes, I can- see how that might be a beneficial outcome.”
Despite everything, he finds that he is weirdly pleased that Jamie is coming to him with this. He isn’t usually someone people ask for advice. Especially footballers. Especially footballers he's written articles about. Usually, they prefer to yell profanities at him and threaten him with bodily harm. Jamie, though - Jamie just seems to want some advice on how to suck Roy Kent's dick.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,143
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 94
- Kudos:
- 1,299
- Bookmarks:
- 177
- Hits:
- 8,590
Bookmarked by unavoidablysarcastic
07 Jul 2025
-
Tags
Summary
Roy Kent doesn't believe in soulmates. That doesn't stop him getting a soulmark when he turns fifteen. It also doesn't stop him accidentally bonding himself to Jamie sodding Tartt during a match, live in front of billions of people.
It was fucking embarrassing, really. Especially because the little prick genuinely turns out to be the one true love of his life.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 24,173
- Chapters:
- 8/?
- Comments:
- 285
- Kudos:
- 1,284
- Bookmarks:
- 251
- Hits:
- 19,435
Bookmarked by unavoidablysarcastic
07 Jul 2025
-
Tags
Summary
What if Jamie had actually done as Roy had asked all the way back in season 1 when Roy told him to get Colin and Isaac to stop messing with Nate?
Or Roy Kent accidentally becomes Jamie Tartt's minder and regrets every step of the process until he doesn't.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 33,795
- Chapters:
- 10/?
- Comments:
- 392
- Kudos:
- 1,408
- Bookmarks:
- 272
- Hits:
- 22,486
Bookmarked by unavoidablysarcastic
07 Jul 2025
-
have you ever thought just maybe (you belong with me) by sanazyung
Fandoms: Ted Lasso (TV)
06 Dec 2023
Tags
Summary
“Jamie. They want to have a season where the lead is openly bisexual, and they have men and women contestants. And they called me. Asking about you.”
“Holy shit,” Jamie breathed, steadying himself against his kitchen counter. “They want me to be the fucking Bachelor?”
or, jamie is the bachelor. roy is a contestant-but not by his own will. the world gets to watch them fall in love anyway.
Series
- Part 1 of bachelor nation
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 85,441
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Comments:
- 430
- Kudos:
- 1,062
- Bookmarks:
- 258
- Hits:
- 22,892
Bookmarked by unavoidablysarcastic
06 Jul 2025
-
a muppet, dying of the incurable condition of being a little bitch by PeonyPages161
Fandoms: Ted Lasso (TV)
12 Dec 2023
Tags
Summary
- and then they suddenly break into another well known melody, one he hasn’t heard in ages and he wheels around and there’s Roy Kent, the Roy Kent, Roy fucking Kent, in his black shirt and jeans, with that face chiseled out of stone and the vibe of a thunderstorm that could wreck a country, striding onto the pitch, to the dugout and the other coaches.
Well.
He’s fucked.
or:
some things go differently than they did during Season 2.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 78,042
- Chapters:
- 16/16
- Comments:
- 194
- Kudos:
- 1,655
- Bookmarks:
- 342
- Hits:
- 44,378
Bookmarked by unavoidablysarcastic
05 Jul 2025