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Podfic of "Are You Ready To Roomba?" by Stedephile by happydaiz_pod (1happydaiz)
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
25 Jun 2025
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Summary
“I am your Roomba 1717p. I am ready to clean”, Stede said. Because that was what he was supposed to say when he was booted up.
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Stede is a robotic vacuum-cleaner. One day, he finds an open door that had never been open before. Behind a door, there must be a room to clean, so Stede goes through. And finds himself on a journey towards new places, new people, and a new purpose ...
Bookmarked by Roberta Seaport (Deepdarkwaters)
02 Sep 2025
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Summary
Edward Teach moves into an old converted Victorian house because the rent his cheap, he figures he's in for a lot of annoying oddities in the place. However, he hadn't planned on a tiny man in his wall. He hadn't planned on falling in love.
Series
- Part 7 of Twitfics/Skyfics
- Part 1 of Little Stede, Big Adventures
Bookmarked by Roberta Seaport (Deepdarkwaters)
19 Jul 2025
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Podfic of "The Man In The Wall" by KalansPhantom by happydaiz_pod (1happydaiz)
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
24 Jun 2025
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Summary
Edward Teach moves into an old converted Victorian house because the rent his cheap, he figures he's in for a lot of annoying oddities in the place. However, he hadn't planned on a tiny man in his wall. He hadn't planned on falling in love.
Bookmarked by Roberta Seaport (Deepdarkwaters)
19 Jul 2025
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Podfic of The Space Between us by 1happydaiz by Baby_kraken for 1happydaiz
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
02 Jun 2025
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Summary
Edward Teach arrives at his AirHotel to find it's the fanciest house he's ever seen. The host has left him all kinds of luxurious treats, including the most comfortable pair of slippers.
The more he finds out about his absent host, Stede Edward Harcourt Bonnet, the more bewitched he becomes.
When he accidentally stumbles across Stede's favourite sex toy one evening, a whole new world of self-discovery is opened up for both of them from across the globe.
They do their best to navigate the unexpected situation they find themselves in, and learn to accept themselves as they accept each other.
A beautiful and unique story, I’ve loved podficcing this.
Please note it gets very EXPLICTCover art by me
Link below is to the full playlist of 13 chapters
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 5
- Kudos:
- 11
- Bookmarks:
- 1
- Hits:
- 250
Bookmarked by Roberta Seaport (Deepdarkwaters)
05 Jun 2025
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Podfic of "The Era of Tightness" by dance_across by Kninjaknitter
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
15 Mar 2025
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Summary
“You’re buying those jeans, right?”
Stede’s lips make a shy little almost-smile. “I’m… considering it. Do you think they look all right?”
Fuck it, Ed decides. Time to go for broke. “Look, mate, what I think is that anyone who sees you in those jeans is immediately gonna start wondering how fast they can get you out of ’em.”- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 15
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 13
- Kudos:
- 17
- Bookmarks:
- 3
- Hits:
- 185
Bookmarked by Roberta Seaport (Deepdarkwaters)
16 Mar 2025
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Summary
For day 26, Real Story, of Janu-au-ry.
Ed is a sailor with a broken rudder; the response to his distress call is nothing he expected.
He waits. The radio crackles into life.
“Pan-pan,” the voice on the other end says. Male. Kiwi. Bit odd, in this part of the world. A bit nervous, but then, maybe that’s not surprising. Not an everyday thing, even when it’s not a more urgent Mayday call.
“La Concorde QAR-1, La Concorde QAR-1, La Concorde QAR-1.
This is the sailboat Revenge SBT2, Revenge SBT2, Revenge SBT2.
Received, pan-pan.
Would you like a tug? Over.”
Ed grins. “Never been one to say no to that, Revenge, over,” he drawls down the radio.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,083
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 210
- Kudos:
- 292
- Bookmarks:
- 66
- Hits:
- 1,405
Bookmarked by Roberta Seaport (Deepdarkwaters)
27 Jan 2025
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Summary
It's the late 90s. Stede, a senior in high school, takes a job at a local fast food franchise to earn some cash, hoping to make it out without his father's help. His trainer at work, Ed, wants to escape too. Maybe together they can get somewhere. Anywhere is better.
They'll get out, sure. But they have a whole lot to learn.
Childhood friends to lovers who don't talk about it to strangers to lovers, basically. Some angst, but hopefully balanced.
Thrilled to say this has been podfic'd by Lindie, the best who ever done it. Link here.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 85,932
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 1,134
- Kudos:
- 764
- Bookmarks:
- 216
- Hits:
- 16,692
Bookmarked by Roberta Seaport (Deepdarkwaters)
14 Aug 2024
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Summary
Stede draws his attention back to the head massage, alternating pressure from the kind of bruising that’s enough to knead a migraine away, to gentle, delicate strokes through his hair. He grows almost meditative with it, forcing his eyes away from Ed’s face and simply enjoying the feeling of body heat and cool, damp-silk hair against his palms. Truthfully, he could do this for hours, rather than the usual three-to-five minutes that’s usually afforded to customers when they…
When…
It’s been longer than three-to-five minutes.
A quick glance at the clock reveals it’s been far, far longer than three-to-five minutes.
Stede doesn’t mind, obviously. And Ed doesn’t seem to be about to question it. But the snide little Lucius-like voice in the back of his mind points out that almost twenty fucking minutes is maybe a bit of an overkill.
Stede yanks his hands away from Ed’s hair like it’s covered in bleach.
“Okey-doke!” Stede manages, voice shrill and a little strangled.
From across the salon, the real Lucius snorts.
(OR: Stede's a hair stylist. Ed shows up for an appointment. And shows up. And shows up. And shows up...)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 106,256
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Comments:
- 2,160
- Kudos:
- 1,158
- Bookmarks:
- 345
- Hits:
- 22,185
Bookmarked by Roberta Seaport (Deepdarkwaters)
11 Aug 2024
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the first time as tragedy, the second time as farce by veeagainst
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
17 Jan 2023
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Summary
Ed's a time travelling soldier from the 22nd century. Stede's a gay nightclub owner in 1934 Berlin. They're about to fall for each other like a ton of bricks.
Also Spanish Jackie invented time travel, and Izzy's up to something bad, as per usual.
As Wee John would say, ‘Does it even make sense?’
Written for JanuAUry, day 16, prompts - time travel, 20th century
PLEASE read the notes for some content warnings before you read the fic.
Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 25,265
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Collections:
- 5
- Comments:
- 422
- Kudos:
- 554
- Bookmarks:
- 175
- Hits:
- 5,894
Bookmarked by Roberta Seaport (Deepdarkwaters)
09 Jun 2024
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Podfic of "Up, Down, Turn Around" by Shearwater by Kninjaknitter
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
15 Apr 2023
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Summary
Ed is possibly having a small midlife crisis. He's dealing with it pretty well, until he meets this blond guy outside the library.
Part One run time is 2:50:42
Series
- Part 1 of Temptation 'Verse
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 57
- Chapters:
- 5/5
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 32
- Kudos:
- 34
- Bookmarks:
- 5
- Hits:
- 985
Bookmarked by Roberta Seaport (Deepdarkwaters)
26 May 2024
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Summary
It takes a few tries for Ed to get what he wants.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 20,749
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 86
- Kudos:
- 202
- Bookmarks:
- 57
- Hits:
- 3,383
Bookmarked by Roberta Seaport (Deepdarkwaters)
19 May 2024
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Summary
“You know I’d be perfectly glad to give you a crack at it, Ed. I’d…it’s always me. And of course, I thoroughly enjoy a…a good round of cards. But if you’d like a turn, I–I think I’d actually rather enjoy giving you the reins for once.”
And why the fuck does his voice sound so pitchy and anxious and tight?
It’s…it’s fucking solitaire.
“Just don’t think I’ll be as good at it as you, love,” Ed murmurs truthfully.
“I think–” Stede confesses quietly. “I think you’d be very good, if you were willing to give it a shot. Methodical. Careful. Gentle.”
Ed frowns. He tilts his head to try and catch Stede’s gaze, but Stede quickly looks away.
“Do you,” Ed begins, hesitant and feeling strangely wrongfooted, like there’s a conversation happening in Stede’s head that he isn’t a part of. “Do you need to be particularly gentle with playing cards?”
(OR: Stede is not talking about solitaire. A post-canon romp about quality time, communication, sex, and being brave enough to ask for the things you want.)
Bookmarked by Roberta Seaport (Deepdarkwaters)
16 Apr 2024
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Summary
The not-so-great side-effects of being a… really pretty famous rockstar, if he’s honest, only come to him after a while in the business, a few not-so-awesome headlines that nearly derailed his career.
It’s really tough to get laid.
or:Ed is a famous rockstar who uses Grindr and anonymous online hook-ups for his needs in order to maintain his image.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 89,248
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Collections:
- 8
- Comments:
- 1,059
- Kudos:
- 2,997
- Bookmarks:
- 783
- Hits:
- 52,343
Bookmarked by Roberta Seaport (Deepdarkwaters)
03 Mar 2024
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Summary
Post S1, pre-S2 release OFMD fics. Arranged in chronological order, not the order where they're spit out from my brain
- Words:
- 34,364
- Works:
- 9
- Bookmarks:
- 67
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A Series of Cases of Penetrating Stab Wounds of the Abdomen by bizarrelittlemew
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
05 Jun 2023
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Summary
A Series of Cases of Penetrating Stab Wounds of the Abdomen by Roach & Spriggs, L. (1717)
Abstract: We present five cases of penetrative stab wounds of the abdomen (all involving the same two patients) and the care and interventions that led to successful recovery (and reconciliation).
To cite this paper: Roach & Spriggs, L. (1717). A Series of Cases of Penetrating Stab Wounds of the Abdomen. Republic of Pirates Medical Journal, 1(1), 29-31.
Bookmarked by Roberta Seaport (Deepdarkwaters)
19 Jan 2024
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Mending by MissingLeftSock for Roberta Seaport (Deepdarkwaters)
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
11 Dec 2023
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Summary
SET IN THE SEAGLASS-VERSE! If you haven't read any of those this will make NO SENSE!
Stede repairs a tear in Ed's stocking and uses it as an excuse to be a little shit. Ed suffers. Lucius is collateral damage.
Bookmarked by Roberta Seaport (Deepdarkwaters)
11 Dec 2023
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Summary
“So first you come out here to spy on me,” she says, and shit, it’s looking more and more likely that Jack might get her ass kicked tonight. “And then you contradict me.” She’s barely looked at Jack this whole time, and Fang only offers her an afterthought kind of glance now, like she could be talking to anyone. Jack’s cunt throbs. Fang grins like she knows it, throws the butt of her smoke into the gutter. “Someone oughta teach you some manners before you find yourself in trouble.”
Day 21 of OFMD Kinktober: Public/semi-public, “over my knee”
Series
- Part 21 of RoughWinds OFMD Kinktober 2023
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,650
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 11
- Kudos:
- 58
- Bookmarks:
- 7
- Hits:
- 604
Bookmarked by Roberta Seaport (Deepdarkwaters)
22 Oct 2023
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Come on, baby, light my plausible deniability by halfeatenmoon
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
14 Oct 2023
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Summary
"Anyone ever tell you that's a filthy habit?"
Izzy and Lucius have a smoke together and talk about self-acceptance and being big old queers, and then Lucius burns Izzy with his cigarette.
Bookmarked by Roberta Seaport (Deepdarkwaters)
18 Oct 2023
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Summary
Ed's minding his business when the new neighbor's kid comes around holding a human puppet. It's creepy as hell, but as soon as the kid's father rounds the corner, Ed doesn't mind.
ETA: Podfic available here from Kninjaknitter my darling dearest
“Hello,” says the strangest voice Ed’s ever heard, jolting him out of his reverie, sending his heart speeding into chaos.He opens his eyes and he’s staring straight at a stuffed animal in the shape of a human person. It is bald with a tiny hat and too-big eyes and it wears a blue shirt and a name tag that says Jeffy in the sort of scrawl normally reserved for words written in blood.
A puppet, he realizes several seconds beyond when it would have been appropriate to respond.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 83,773
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Comments:
- 1,644
- Kudos:
- 1,733
- Bookmarks:
- 584
- Hits:
- 32,379
Bookmarked by Roberta Seaport (Deepdarkwaters)
15 Oct 2023
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Podfic of "not pickles" by smallestchurch by Kninjaknitter
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
01 Dec 2023
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Summary
Podfic run time is 10:13:52
The music used in this podfic is "in my life" played by Jason Lumenhttps://spotify.link/2sR6LYcjIDb
Ed's minding his business when the new neighbor's kid comes around holding a human puppet. It's creepy as hell, but as soon as the kid's father rounds the corner, Ed doesn't mind.
“Hello,” says the strangest voice Ed’s ever heard, jolting him out of his reverie, sending his heart speeding into chaos.
He opens his eyes and he’s staring straight at a stuffed animal in the shape of a human person. It is bald with a tiny hat and too-big eyes and it wears a blue shirt and a name tag that says Jeffy in the sort of scrawl normally reserved for words written in blood.
A puppet, he realizes several seconds beyond when it would have been appropriate to respond.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 119
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 72
- Kudos:
- 66
- Bookmarks:
- 14
- Hits:
- 1,748
Bookmarked by Roberta Seaport (Deepdarkwaters)
15 Oct 2023