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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Shane Hollander has a secret life. No, not the one where he's hiding his trysts with his rival.

    He's a pseudonymous hockey romance author under the alias Jane Dutch.

    And the Metros WAGs have just picked up his first release for their book club...

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    51,000
    Chapters:
    17/20
    Collections:
    11
    Comments:
    9,288
    Kudos:
    7,618
    Bookmarks:
    2,323
    Hits:
    164,416

    19 Jul 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Metros Updates️ @metrosupdatesmlh
    After the Metros only barely made it into the playoffs this season, rumours suggest that Shane Hollander is considering leaving the team. His contract is up at the end of the season and the captain hasn`t re-signed with the team yet. 

    leo @h0ckeyrules
    Replying to @metrosupdatesmlh
    hollander is like the most loyal player in the mlh, he wouldn`t leave them for anything

    Sel @metrosmausi
    Replying to @metrosupdatesmlh
    istg if we loose hollander, we`re done. Who should score goals for us? Pike??? 

    Oliver @centaurspro
    Replying to @metrosupdatesmlh
    call me delusional but i say hollanders signing with the cens and he and roz are gonna make up the most dominant duo in hockey ever 

     

     

    or: Shane`s contract at the Montreal Metros is ending and after marrying Ilya a year ago they both decided long-distance is not for them anymore. Now Shane has to tell his homophobic team that he is leaving them to play with his husband (that they don`t know of yet) while said husband is being a menace on twitter in preparing their coming out.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,759
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Comments:
    159
    Kudos:
    1,106
    Bookmarks:
    232
    Hits:
    19,789

    18 Jul 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Then like an anomaly in one of his datasets, a green OPEN tag appears next to one of the restaurants. Shane squints his eyes, having difficulty seeing properly without his glasses.

    Irina's Kitchen
    4.02 stars
    3 reviews

    Shane doesn't bother reading them. He taps on the website and waits for it to load. Only to be met with error.

    Sighing he exits the page and keeps on scrolling. Nothing that is open catches his interest and the rest are closed. He's wondering how stale celery would taste dipped in pickle juice when his eyes land on Irina's Kitchen once more.

    There's a phone number under the address. Shane bites his lower lip and wonders if he should call.

    A woman with an accented voice picks up after the 5th ring.

    “Hello?”

    “Uh, hey, are you guys still open?”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    41,453
    Chapters:
    11/16
    Comments:
    2,240
    Kudos:
    6,472
    Bookmarks:
    2,008
    Hits:
    109,222

    18 Jul 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    @ russianbear clove 

     roz is so fucking funny man had two seconds to process and he spent them thinking about how to get that ass

    @ icemenace Ro - he's so real

    @ shaneybugbug Libby - oh he's been WAITING for this 

    @ iwant81 Abbie - he was so obviously joking oh my god 

    @ russianbear clove  - ummmm i don't think so

    @ iwant81 Abbie - rozanov likes girls english just isn't his first language so he accidentally made it look like something you freaks are taking advantage of

    @ russianbear clove - so he's joking or it was an accident??? Istg at least chose one

     

    or - Shane Hollander comes out and Ilya loses his mind

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    45,057
    Chapters:
    13/23
    Collections:
    5
    Comments:
    3,936
    Kudos:
    15,138
    Bookmarks:
    4,403
    Hits:
    320,907

    14 Jul 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Several MLH players have their phones hacked.

    Most people find embarrassing photos.

    Ilya Rozanov accidentally leaks five years' worth of sex reviews.

    -

    You know that TikTok trend where people rate how good the sex was in front of their partner?

    Yeah. It's that.

     
    📢📢📢
    UPDATED: (second chapter) July 12, 2026

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,045
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    894
    Kudos:
    22,425
    Bookmarks:
    4,135
    Hits:
    173,567

    13 Jul 2026

  6. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Léa Martin @MrsLéaMartin92
    Shane Hollander is TAKEN !?

    Clara @mrsshanehollander4ever
    Shane Hollander has a BABY????

    Léonie @LeonieGagnon27328
    Is this officially the NHL’s cutest baby?

    Lily @BostonLily1991
    DOES THE BABY HAVE FRECKLES?

    Charlotte @charlottefromquébec
    Replying to @BostonLily1991
    what?

    One month before the tuna melt incident, pictures are posted online of Shane and Hayden’s outing to the aquarium.

    Within minutes, the internet is convinced that Shane Hollander has become a father, and people everywhere are mourning the fact that the NHL’s most eligible bachelor is off the market.

    “People everywhere” includes Ilya Rozanov.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,352
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    217
    Kudos:
    6,598
    Bookmarks:
    1,069
    Hits:
    66,941

    04 Jul 2026

  7. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    What do you do when you’re getting married in six months and you have 22 guys whose literal jobs are to do whatever you tell them?

    The Ottawa Centaurs are conscripted to pull off their captain’s wedding. The fact that they still don’t know who he’s marrying is entirely beside the point. (All the signs are there. All of them.)

    UPDATE: Chapter added at the end. The real story is chapters 1-5 (about 13k) with a bonus chapter 6 (about 12k all on its own)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    26,280
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    212
    Kudos:
    1,459
    Bookmarks:
    294
    Hits:
    15,142

    02 Jul 2026

  8. Public Bookmark *

    Words:
    82,013
    Works:
    5
    Bookmarks:
    2,169

    20 Jun 2026

  9. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    The hot mic incident was just the beginning.

    Now the internet watches in real-time as Ilya’s Spotify playlist gets leaked (with NOTES), Shane attempts subtlety (narrator: he fails), they bicker about boy bands on late night TV, someone admits to having a ring for six months ON TWITTER, and approximately 20 different social media platforms collectively lose their goddamn minds.

    Featuring: journalists having breakdowns, Reddit threads that require moderator intervention, TikTok compilations with 1.2M views, brand partnerships from Skittles, a plague of engagement speculation, and two hockey players who cannot stop being chaotic disasters on main.

    The fandom was writing fic about them. Turns out reality is messier, queerer, and somehow MORE unhinged.

    [or social media reacts to the week following the Hot Mic Incident™, told entirely through tweets, Reddit posts, Instagram stories, podcast transcripts, and the world’s most romantic Spotify playlist]

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,067
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    727
    Kudos:
    19,254
    Bookmarks:
    2,551
    Hits:
    171,075

    19 Jun 2026

  10. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    During the All Star break in 2016 (in between the two Montreal cup wins), Shane Hollander’s life is upended when a rumor spreads through the league that he has a twin sister he has never talked about publicly. A twin sister named Jane. A twin sister named Jane who is dating Shane’s biggest rival, Ilya Rozanov.

    Or what would have happened if the Boston team, with their hockey brains, knew that Rozanov had a girl named Jane and spotted a text where he referred to "her" as Hollander so they jumped to the wrong conclusion?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,910
    Chapters:
    11/?
    Comments:
    100
    Kudos:
    663
    Bookmarks:
    175
    Hits:
    16,254

    02 Jun 2026

  11. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Hayden took a bite, chewed pensively, then asked, “So, where are you going?”

    Shane felt his lips twitch into a small smile. “New York.”
    ---
    OR: Instead of Ilya moving to Ottawa, Shane moves to New York. Now that he's playing with Scott Hunter, Shane finds himself more involved in the queer scene and on the fast-track to another MLH Cup final. Since he stays in Boston, Ilya's still at the top of his game, setting records as he leads his team straight through the playoffs. What happens when being closer together, means their rivalry is stronger than ever?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    69,284
    Chapters:
    19/?
    Comments:
    1,500
    Kudos:
    5,889
    Bookmarks:
    1,769
    Hits:
    159,386

    02 Jun 2026

  12. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    5+1

    5 times the Centaurs and other GC friends think Ilya is being a pushy or bossy twat to Shane, and one time they see Shane's true colors.

    Aka, that one time Shane walked Ilya like a dog in front of the Cens and they all had to recalibrate their opinion of their captain's relationship

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,203
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    728
    Kudos:
    11,537
    Bookmarks:
    1,700
    Hits:
    77,935

    29 May 2026

  13. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “We do not say anything about the Hollander situation,” LeClaire tells them even though it sounds like he’s already resigned to what he knows is going to happen.

    After all, Roz gets extremely mad whenever it’s brought up. Not that Cliff can blame him, he’s pretty sure that Roz liked Hollander before this (wouldn’t chirp him half as much if he didn’t). Finding out that he’s such a bastard must sting.

    Not to mention that Roz does not mess around with people that disrespect girls. Or women. Or kids. Or dogs. Or the elderly (excluding Scott Hunter). Or really anyone, if it’s for petty stupid reasons.

    “Of course,” Cliff agrees for both of them since Roz is still too busy texting someone.

    It’s apparently not good enough for LeClaire because he asks, “Roz?”

    “Just one second,” he answers without raising his eyes from his phone or stopping his typing. “Need to get my Jane to agree with something. She’s very stubborn.”

     

    Or. My take on the 'their text leak and now everybody thinks that Shane is an abusive bastard' premise. Featuring Ilya giving a presser, Marly realizing in real time who 'Jane' is and the internet reacting to the craziness.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    24,602
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    1,276
    Kudos:
    16,618
    Bookmarks:
    3,573
    Hits:
    195,420

    27 May 2026

  14. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Cardiac tamponade: pressure on that heart that prevents it from filling and beating adequately.

    Shane thought he knew two things: his move to Ottawa would cause chaos, and that the Ottawa Centaurs were nice.

    As it turned out, he only knew one of those things.

    (Or: the Cens are still a team of professional hockey players. They're going to fuck up.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    32,502
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    3
    Comments:
    1,784
    Kudos:
    10,122
    Bookmarks:
    3,212
    Hits:
    121,711

    26 May 2026

  15. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    [Jane has requested your location on Find My Friends]

    or

    Shane and Ilya's texts and location sharing throughout their relationship post-cottage

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,636
    Chapters:
    11/?
    Comments:
    332
    Kudos:
    3,285
    Bookmarks:
    651
    Hits:
    53,003

    25 May 2026

  16. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Emmy: When did you first hook up with him?
    Jane: 2010
    Caro: WHAT
    Megan: GIRL
    Tia: SEVEN YEARS??
    Megan: My jaw is borderline unhinged rn

    Or: In 2017, Shane finds a place where he can talk about his sex life...a group chat for girls who have slept with Ilya Rozanov

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,618
    Chapters:
    8/12
    Comments:
    7,438
    Kudos:
    31,105
    Bookmarks:
    6,335
    Hits:
    438,793

    24 May 2026

  17. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Ashley: but seriously if not at his place then where do you meet?
    Jane: We hook up in hotels, mostly
    Vanessa: He doesn’t come to your place in Montreal?
    Jane: No
    I bought another building where we can meet discreetly
    Madeleine: YOU BOUGHT A SEX CONDO???

    alternate title: shane hollander befriends boston wags surprisingly fast

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    79,190
    Chapters:
    15/?
    Comments:
    1,572
    Kudos:
    7,343
    Bookmarks:
    1,731
    Hits:
    151,019

    17 May 2026

  18. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Ilya Rozanov is in love, closeted, catastrophically lonely, and apparently incapable of referring to Shane Hollander in present tense.

    The Centaurs come to a- given the circumstances- reasonable conclusion.

    Or:
    Five times the Centaurs thought Ilya Rozanov was mourning his dead wife, and the one time they discovered his wife was actually Shane Hollander.
    Shane, for the record, is alive and really confused.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    31,294
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Collections:
    3
    Comments:
    1,576
    Kudos:
    20,098
    Bookmarks:
    4,254
    Hits:
    239,329

    09 May 2026

  19. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    an impulsive decision to snoop through ilya's phone for jane's contact leads to cliff marleau forming one of the closest friendships with someone he's ever had. unbeknownst to him, his new best friend is actually shane hollander.

    a canon divergent in which cliff marleau befriends jane, and accidentally forms the friendship of a lifetime ;-)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    157,205
    Chapters:
    44/?
    Comments:
    3,629
    Kudos:
    8,290
    Bookmarks:
    2,566
    Hits:
    253,414

    06 May 2026

  20. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “Hello,” Ilya repeats, still kind of stuck on those freckles.

    “Hi?” the man says.

    “Hi,” Ilya says—again.

    Oh god, he's said hello three times now. He should literally say anything else. His name, probably. His phone number, preferably.

    “Hi,” Ilya says again, because he can’t help it. “I am—”

    “Are you Nick?” the man asks, and it comes out as a breathless sound.

    OR: Shane gets stood up on a blind date, and Ilya comes to the rescue, and proceeds to make a series of questionable decisions.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    64,878
    Chapters:
    12/12
    Comments:
    3,803
    Kudos:
    12,447
    Bookmarks:
    3,948
    Hits:
    238,581

    05 May 2026

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