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How was he supposed to explain that sometimes, his head belonged to another, two anothers, perhaps even three, and they're all trapped inside is fraying sanity like glowing fireflies in little glass jars; that sometimes he was a marine soldier who liked to hurt himself – purge himself of sin, of insubordination; sometimes he was a chick who sounded like the warmth of his mother; and sometimes he was a kid that wanted building blocks and french lullabies and to eat crayons.
Or Dean has dissociative identity disorder.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,871
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 9
- Kudos:
- 454
- Bookmarks:
- 69
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- 5,036
Bookmarked by Non_Linear_Equation
08 Mar 2021
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"This little light of mine; I'm gonna let it shine.
Let it shine, let it shine, let it shine.
Won't let no devil blow it out..."Or
One where Dean tries so hard to be hopeful in spite of the darkness around him. He tries to shine, but there's a Devil around every corner... waiting to blow that little light out.
Also
One where Sam tells himself that maybe he can save the damaged boy in his class. Only, Sam wonders if he is just another devil.
Bookmarked by Non_Linear_Equation
08 Mar 2021
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“Do you trust me, Dean?”
“You know I do,” Dean answered, his voice carrying resignation and sadness. He knew Cas was right. This was the only way if he wanted to help save his brother. He had to do it, even though everything in him wanted to fight it. But he trusted Cas with his life. And now he was going to show him just how deep that trust ran.
Dean fell to his knees in front of the angel, bowing his head forward as he was fitted with the extraordinarily heavy collar. Castiel’s fingers caressed his skin when he closed the clasp of the sign of slavery; the symbol that gave Dean’s life over to the angel’s mercy. Dean suppressed the urge to close his eyes.
~
We know good people go to Heaven and bad people go to Hell, but where do the medium people go? Welcome to Limbo, a fourth plane of existence, ruled by angels and built upon the servitude of the humans enslaved to them.
While on a routine salt n’ burn, the Winchester boys encounter a garrison of angels. Sam ends up being taken to Limbo; leaving it up to his brother, Dean, and the angel, Castiel to infiltrate the plane in order to rescue him.
Series
- Part 1 of Broken Reflections Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 196,710
- Chapters:
- 20/20
- Collections:
- 6
- Comments:
- 1,329
- Kudos:
- 3,349
- Bookmarks:
- 1,302
- Hits:
- 135,551
Bookmarked by Non_Linear_Equation
08 Mar 2021
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Dean Winchester is a 21 year old watching his 17 year old brother while their father is away on a hunt. When the brothers get bored they decide to check out what looks like a haunting in the small town they are staying in. Dean gets raped and finds out that is isn't a hunt at all. This is much scarier and now he is one of the victims. When Sam insists on calling Bobby, Dean had to work double time to hide the damage that was done to him.
~Timeskip~
Dean Winchester is older now, and going to check out what his brother thinks might be a hunt in the same town that Dean was raped in all those years ago. This time Dean has his boyfriend, and resident angel, Castiel with him. When bad turns to worse and Dean realizes that this is the same man that raped him how will he hande it? Did he ever really deal with the trauma from his early adult years? Is this going to put a wedge in his and Castiel's relationship, or make them stronger?Bookmarked by Non_Linear_Equation
04 Mar 2021
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Dean and Castiel are kinda-actually-pretty different, but even if they express it in different ways, they have a lot more in common than they think as they get to know each other. And still a whole lot of different, too.
Bookmarked by Non_Linear_Equation
04 Mar 2021
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Bookmarked by Non_Linear_Equation
04 Mar 2021
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What really happened to Dean in Hell? After thirty years, why did he finally break?
Series
- Part 1 of Dean's Hell
Bookmarked by Non_Linear_Equation
04 Mar 2021
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Dean Winchester, formerly Mary Deanna Winchester, doesn't understand why bad things happen to him. Traumatized because of John Winchester, Dean fakes his death so he can escape John's wrath after Sam applies to Stanford. He takes the Impala and high-tails it out of there only to meet Charlie Bradbury. This story answers the age-long question of what happens when a lesbian and a bisexual walk into a bar.
Basically a retelling of Supernatural but I only reference the episodes because I don't hate myself enough to rewrite exact episodes. Just pretend each chapter or part is a season. I'll try putting it in the chapter names but no promises that I will remember. This will be done when it gets done. I forgot I have a job lmao
Edit 10/7/2022: look...I will finish this at some point so I'm putting this on hiatus for now. I am just a lil guy getting pummeled by life
Bookmarked by Non_Linear_Equation
04 Mar 2021
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In which Dean is forced to deal with his trauma and come to a reckoning with himself. Also, Cas is there.
See notes for more specific Content Warnings.
*** *** ***
"No one hates you as much as you do," Crowley told him once. That's Dean's whole M.O. right there. His two fundamental truths are that it is his job to save everyone, and that no matter how many people he saves it will never change the fact that he is 90% crap.
Dean knows who he is. Yeah, he's done some good for the world, okay, he gets that. But deep down? The person he is inside is still worthless. Dean will never be good enough, never be any kind of role model. He's never going to shake that, so if that's what this whole seven trials angelic bullshit is about, then he and Cas might as well hold hands and drive off the cliff now.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 37,212
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 314
- Kudos:
- 2,595
- Bookmarks:
- 855
- Hits:
- 34,705
Bookmarked by Non_Linear_Equation
04 Mar 2021
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Alternate Universe;
The day you wake up as 18 is the day you will find writing on your body. The first words your soul mate will speak to you that day. And the day Dean wakes up on his 18th birthday, he finds his words.Suddenly he is cast into a melee of mysteries that all lead back to one person. Will he be able to save them, or will it ruin everything he's ever known?
Bookmarked by Non_Linear_Equation
04 Mar 2021
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Original prompt: I really want to see a fic where Sam, Dean, and Mary end up working with this hunter on a case. And Dean is acting weird. And they find out at some point that it's because this hunter used to work with John too and had raped Dean either when he was a teenager or when Sam was at Stanford. I just basically want to see how Sam and Mary react to figuring this out. That's what I'm looking forward to
Or,
The one where karma is a bitch.
Bookmarked by Non_Linear_Equation
04 Mar 2021
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Band AU.
In a time between the heat blasted through in waves— like the calm waves of the lake Lawrence, Kansas impossibly had— and, cold crashed through ruthlessly like a storm in the middle of the night, a story about love was formed through healing Dean Winchester— a member of the famous band, Angels and Demons— and teaching Castiel Milton— a home-schooled boy who struggled to become what his parents wanted him to be, the things in life he can't get from reading texts and observation.
In this story, love was an instinct, destiny— one might say— that they both can’t deny.
Bookmarked by Non_Linear_Equation
04 Mar 2021
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Dean and Sam Winchester are on a hunt in Utah, and the whole thing flips when Dean gets raped and attacked outside a bar. Sam and Dean struggle how to get through the traumatic event, and it causes Dean to open up about his past. After Sam learns of this event, and of his brothers horrific past, he wonders if his brother will ever be the same again.
( I TRY to post every week too, btw)
Any polite criticism in the comments is greatly appreciated!Bookmarked by Non_Linear_Equation
04 Mar 2021
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*TRIGGER WARNING!!!!!!!!! IF SUICIDAL OR DEPRESSED, DON'T READ!!!!*
Dean Winchester is a man of many secrets. There are some secrets that just need to be shared before he does the one thing he promised himself he would never do.Bookmarked by Non_Linear_Equation
03 Mar 2021
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Dean and Sam Winchester are ordinary high schoolers with the very open secret that John Winchester is an abusive parent. Castiel Novak is Dean's boyfriend, the youngest child of Wentzville's very own crime family. When, just before the first day of his senior year, Dean is beaten badly by John, Cas has to choose between abiding by the rules of his family or enacting justice for his boyfriend and deal with the ramifications of that choice.
This fic is a rewrite of my Young Blood Chronicles series, including all three fics in one, posted as I rewrite the chapters.
Bookmarked by Non_Linear_Equation
03 Mar 2021
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It takes a long time for Dean to find peace in himself.
"The first is sophomore stone eyed Idelle Mehta, who blushes at Dean under the bleachers, and when she tells him how pretty he is in between kisses as Dean's hands are learning how to undo her bra, he feels himself wilt away under what she probably had considered praise. He moves his mouth to her throat, and works her till she forgets her name. When he looks in the mirror, later, after Sam has conked out on his bed cuddled up to Catcher in the Rye, he looks his reflection in the eye and tells himself he is not pretty."
Bookmarked by Non_Linear_Equation
03 Mar 2021
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AU:Dean is a senior in high school and still doesn't have the courage to tell his father he doesn't want to take over the family business, let alone that he has a boyfriend.
Warning again: Rape/non-con
Bookmarked by Non_Linear_Equation
02 Mar 2021
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Dean took Sammy and ran away from their abusive dad. Dean's worked as a mechanic his entire life in order to support Sam's dream of becoming a lawyer. Then someone catches Dean doing advanced math and wants to know more about Dean's life and who he is.
Something bad happens and Dean needs help. He needs to face his fear and go to court again. He doesn't want to burden Sam, who can he call? Will Dean be able to stay sober?
Bookmarked by Non_Linear_Equation
02 Mar 2021
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Castiel stumbles into a local café in order to avoid the rain, and during the process he meets a very attractive barista by the name of Dean Winchester. It doesn't take long for Castiel to fall in love with Dean's wit and charm.
Too bad that Dean has a boyfriend.
a coffee shop au no one asked for
Series
- Part 8 of Destiel deserves better
Bookmarked by Non_Linear_Equation
02 Mar 2021
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“Dad, I can’t believe it!” Sam said as he grabbed John in a hug. John hugged him back but over Sam’s shoulder was watching with narrowed eyes as Dean faltered in his shock and wobbled but found himself caught by Cas who wrapped an arm around Dean’s waist from behind to steady him and give him comfort.
Sam pulled away and Dean stepped forward unsure what to do. Did he hug his dad? Play it cool?
Run for his life?
John comes back to life just as Dean and Cas admit their feelings and agree to try a relationship. Forces try to drive them apart as new and old enemies come after Dean. Will Dean finally be able to stand up to his father and stop the abuse? Will he and Cas be able to salvage their relationship with others trying to tear them apart?
Timeline for this is a sort of mashup between season 8 and season 9 (purgatory, Abaddon, MOC). The angels did not fall, the trials and Gadreel never happened but Crowley and Abaddon are still in competition for hell.
Tags and characters to be added. Like most of my stories, this is a dark fic with a very dark John and Dean suffers. Underage is for references to past abuse.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 84,717
- Chapters:
- 41/41
- Comments:
- 863
- Kudos:
- 1,287
- Bookmarks:
- 274
- Hits:
- 49,949
Bookmarked by Non_Linear_Equation
02 Mar 2021