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Miscellaneous PHM Pastiches by ketonebodies
Fandoms: Andy Weir's Project Hail Mary - All Media Types
06 Sep 2026
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Summary
Wee pastiches that aren’t long enough to be their own story, but I like writing them.
Chapter One: Riddley Walker
Chapter Two: Up Goer Five
Chapter Three: The Once and Future King
Chapter Four: The Book of Margery KempeBookmarked by bacteriacarbonandlight
10 Sep 2026
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oh, my talking bird by Edgebug
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir
20 Sep 2026
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Summary
"Well," Grace says, reading over the monitor with Mary's full report, "everything looks good. I'm as healthy as a horse. A healthy horse," he adds, getting ahead of Rocky's inevitable logical objection to the phrase.
"Mm," Rocky hums, "no, Grace not as tall as horse. Hair is shorter, also."
"Are those--" Grace plants his hands on his hips. "Are those the main differences you see between me and a horse?"
(In which Grace has multiple crises, breaks his foot, gets his brain microwaved, learns to hate cherry tomatoes, and becomes a celebrity--not necessarily in that order)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 46,490
- Chapters:
- 10/?
- Comments:
- 1,004
- Kudos:
- 798
- Bookmarks:
- 230
- Hits:
- 10,604
Bookmarked by bacteriacarbonandlight
26 Aug 2026
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The Nature of a Fixable Problem by startingatmidnight
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir, Andy Weir's Project Hail Mary - All Media Types
18 Aug 2026
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Summary
Adrian knows that everything is solvable if you break it down into the right sequence of steps.
The abrupt return of their long-dead partner in an alien spaceship has brought with it a series of absurd, worrying and even dangerous problems, but they're confident they can see the solution even if nobody else can.
They just need to make the alien fall in love with Rocky.
Bookmarked by bacteriacarbonandlight
22 Aug 2026
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Summary
Two lonely people, and an interview with Ryland Grace.
Bookmarked by bacteriacarbonandlight
20 Aug 2026
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The Black Knight and the Moon by Waid
Fandoms: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies), Star Trek
09 Mar 2019
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Summary
He’d thought, before, that it would help, knowing that whatever happened, it wouldn’t really be Spock doing it to him.
He hadn’t realised it would be this lonely.
or
Jim makes three promises and Spock makes one. As Spock's pon farr begins, they will both have to learn the cost of keeping them.Elsewhere, Leonard McCoy does not, in fact, deliver the shovel talk.
Bookmarked by bacteriacarbonandlight
20 Aug 2026
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edit me from history by grimark
Fandoms: Andy Weir's Project Hail Mary - All Media Types
17 Aug 2026
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Summary
I parked my car at the trailhead and killed the engine. The strained silence that I’d so far been managing to ignore seemed to expand to fill the space inside.
We sat for a moment. Ryland chewed his gum loudly, but didn’t say anything. I sighed.
“Let’s just get out there and try to have a nice time, okay?” I said.
Series
- Part 3 of xeno jerkoff cinematic universe
Bookmarked by bacteriacarbonandlight
18 Aug 2026
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Summary
"I love you," Harry says on June 25, 51, halfway through a game of cribbage. Cuno has done nothing more notable than tell a joke that made Harry laugh.
Cuno doesn't know what to say. Nobody loves Cuno. Loving Cuno should probably be an interisolary crime. "Gross," he says.
An exploration of those Cuno has lost, those he's gained, and those he can't let go.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 12,950
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 364
- Kudos:
- 3,854
- Bookmarks:
- 1,170
- Hits:
- 30,168
Bookmarked by bacteriacarbonandlight
16 Aug 2026
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THE HIT AND RUN by brawltogethernow
Fandoms: Disco Elysium (Video Game), Death Note (Anime & Manga)
16 Feb 2025
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Summary
Harry hits Light Yagami with his car. (Based on a joke post, taken extremely seriously.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 36,039
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 346
- Kudos:
- 2,503
- Bookmarks:
- 1,039
- Hits:
- 33,538
Bookmarked by bacteriacarbonandlight
10 Aug 2026
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Where Our Eyes Meet by xiaotianism for deervsheadlights
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir
25 Jul 2026
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Summary
"You…" Rocky's voice is uncharacteristically hesitant. It honestly throws me off. "You not like other Rocky's Grace."
I flick my eyes to him. "What?"
"I say, you not like other Rocky's Grace."
"No, I heard you," I go back to playing solitaire in want of something better to do, but I can barely focus on the screen. "Why do you say that?"
"…Other Rocky show Rocky earth media," he starts, and alright, I'm already worried.
OR: So, you meet alternate versions of yourself. Big deal. At least they aren't having nightmares in the same room as you, or anything.
Series
- Part 1 of Divergent Evolution
Bookmarked by bacteriacarbonandlight
25 Jul 2026
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Quantum Entanglement for Dummies by startingatmidnight
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir, Andy Weir's Project Hail Mary - All Media Types
29 Jul 2026
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Summary
Ryland's always been the guy to keep a wall up in his relationships. It's a little tougher to do when his best friend shares his brain now.
Series
- Part 2 of The Astrobiology Immersion Program
Bookmarked by bacteriacarbonandlight
24 Jul 2026
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you should try to do as little harm as you can by peglarpapers for doomedblade
Fandoms: Andy Weir's Project Hail Mary - All Media Types
21 Jul 2026
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Summary
Very soon, it is as if he had never existed outside of his capacity orbiting her.
It is here that the trouble arises.
Eva and Grace in the year before launch.
Bookmarked by bacteriacarbonandlight
22 Jul 2026
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phenomenal nominal nothing by grimark
Fandoms: Andy Weir's Project Hail Mary - All Media Types
26 Apr 2026
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Summary
“Proof of concept,” ♫♬♯♩♩♫ says. “We’ve tested it thoroughly to ensure it fits the specified nutritional profile, and several members of our team have ingested small amounts of it to ensure there were no adverse effects.”
“You ate some of it?” I ask, rudely. I’m too irate to mind my language. Who do they think they are? That meat is for Grace. In a way, that meat is Grace.
“Yes,” ♫♬♯♩♩♫ says. They and the rest of the human life support thrum know better than to be offended by my occasionally strange behaviour. “Obviously we weren’t going to risk the life of Honoured Grace on a completely untested technology.”
That doesn’t mean much. There’s a lot of things that are safe for ingestion by Eridians that would outright kill a human.
Trust Grace, I remind myself. He’ll have thought of all this.
(OR: Grace's meburgers from the book epilogue. Let's talk about those!)
Bookmarked by bacteriacarbonandlight
21 Jul 2026
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Thirteen Ways Of Writing on a Blackboard by ketonebodies
Fandoms: Andy Weir's Project Hail Mary - All Media Types
21 Jul 2026
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Summary
Project Hail Mary, as written by thirteen different authors- Edward Lear, Terry Goodkind, Geoffrey Willans, James Tiptree Jr, HP Lovecraft, Nancy Atherton, Susanna Clarke, PG Wodehouse, John Ringo, AG Swinburne, Sei Shonagon, Charlotte Perkins Gilman, and Charlotte Brontë.
Bookmarked by bacteriacarbonandlight
21 Jul 2026
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dog days by furiosophie for spqr
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir
14 Jul 2026
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Summary
[What does hand flex mean, question?] Rocky asks from where we're huddled together on the floor, watching the 2005 adaption of Pride & Prejudice.
"It's uh—" I hit pause, search for the right word. "Have we had yearning in the vocab yet?"
——
or: two years and seventeen days after reaching Erid's orbit, the climate control in the biodome breaks
Bookmarked by bacteriacarbonandlight
15 Jul 2026
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time for caution by landsat9
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir
22 Aug 2026
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Summary
In the middle of an argument, Rocky accidentally ruptures Grace's eardrums as they head to Tau Ceti E.
Can be read as slash or not.
Bookmarked by bacteriacarbonandlight
10 Jul 2026
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Summary
As he stared down into the lumpy grey goop that was his evening rations, he contemplated whether it was really worth it.
They’d come a very long way just for Grace to give up and die at the last hurdle, both physically and emotionally. The Tau Ceti system was a long, long way away now, and Grace had faced not one but two highly emotional suicide missions. Three, if you counted the time before he was given a military grade roofie and hucked into space without his memories.
Rocky and Grace make it back to Erid! Huzzah!
Now they have to navigate all of... that.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 124,280
- Chapters:
- 11/?
- Comments:
- 1,399
- Kudos:
- 5,610
- Bookmarks:
- 1,511
- Hits:
- 111,903
Bookmarked by bacteriacarbonandlight
02 Jul 2026
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grace2050_cv_FINAL(5) by landsat9
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir
25 Jun 2026
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Summary
Ryland Grace's curriculum vitae (and some articles from the cv). Literally. That's it.
Bookmarked by bacteriacarbonandlight
02 Jul 2026
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Striking a Chord by startingatmidnight
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir, Andy Weir's Project Hail Mary - All Media Types
04 Apr 2026
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Summary
Living on a spaceship with an alien that exclusively speaks in song can really recontextualize karaoke for a guy.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,673
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 283
- Kudos:
- 4,040
- Bookmarks:
- 1,006
- Hits:
- 17,386
Bookmarked by bacteriacarbonandlight
27 Jun 2026
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Summary
“But you said you didn’t have a word for – for forcing someone into reproduction?”
“No. Is different, but equivalent violation. Means, to force to sleep.”
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Or, Dr. Ryland Grace has yet to confront the choices taken from him. Eridian norms, ironically enough, force the issue.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 25,764
- Chapters:
- 7/7
- Collections:
- 7
- Comments:
- 817
- Kudos:
- 3,117
- Bookmarks:
- 966
- Hits:
- 23,350
Bookmarked by bacteriacarbonandlight
23 Jun 2026
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you weren't there that day for the Naming of Things by callmearcturus
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir, Project Hail Mary (2026)
12 Jun 2026
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Summary
"Rocky did not understand human names and titles when we met. Eridian names longer, give information on Eridian's home, associations, skills." For the first time in ages, he positioned two of his arms together, forming the design that Grace thought of like a family crest, a single design bisected.
"You should teach me to read those before we get to Erid, so I can be polite." As Grace considered the linework, already picking up on some vague ideas from the shapes in Rocky's carapace, something else occurred to him. "So… I picked 'Rocky' because your outer shell looks like stone."
"And for inspirational story of athlete who defeats human system of poverty to become great champion. Eye of the tiger."
"Retroactively, yeah." Grace bent at the hips, getting to Rocky's 'eye' level. "So what'd you name me?"
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 13,265
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Comments:
- 411
- Kudos:
- 4,368
- Bookmarks:
- 1,057
- Hits:
- 25,797
Bookmarked by bacteriacarbonandlight
19 Jun 2026
