potatoes_tomatoes
Fandoms
- Looney Tunes | Merrie Melodies (6)
- South Park (5)
- Space Jam (Movies) (2)
- Rayman (Video Games) (1)
- Invader Zim (1)
Recent works
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Summary
Twitter writing suggestions, I’ll add chapters and tags as I finish them.
ch 1: Jealousy
Kyle has some reservations on Cartman’s recent excursions outside their little friend group. It’s only out of the goodness of his heart and concern for this kid’s well being that he goes off of his way to investigate.ch 2: kyman week day 1– Kindergarten
Eric Cartman goes to school for the very first time… five months into the school year, no thanks to Liane. Better late than never! Eric Cartman, however, thinks it sucks major balls, especially because of the green hatted kid’s nagging!! -
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Summary
A lot can happen over a bloody nose.
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When Life Dicks You Down, Don't Make Lemonade by potatoes_tomatoes for numbknee
Fandoms: South Park
19 Nov 2022
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Little Kyle Broflovski is on his deathbead over a matter of not getting cool prizes for a fundraiser. It's the principle of the thing, really.
A whole month of aggressive sales, scrutinous calculations, selling until their asses fell off, and all Stan, Kenny, Cartman and Kyle got were glow in the dark wristbands and a Fortnite sippy cup. They reached the quota, but the prizes ultimately went towards the highest seller.
They were beaten by one snickerdoodle pack. Nathan and Mimsy won all three prizes.
Kyle sees there's no reason to go on in life. Cartman just wants Kyle to snap out of it so the guys can go get some Denny's.
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Clyde Frog is concerned about his friend Eric's well being after being yet again, rejected from attending Kyle's birthday party. But also, fuck Kyle! Who needs a stupid birthday party anyways when you have a cool tea party?
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He first assumed that being so heavily involved with Cartman became part of his daily routine, and Kyle was, in Kenny’s words, a slut for constants. Kyle preferred the term “sticking to what’s familiar”.
Or perhaps it went deeper than that, something Kyle couldn't articulate, but knew was there.
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Or, Kyle's feelings for Eric Theodore Fucking Cartman.
Recent series
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An egotist and a diva walk into a movie set… by potatoes_tomatoes
Fandom: Looney Tunes | Merrie Melodies, Space Jam (1996), Space Jam (Movies)
24 Dec 2021
Summary
A collection of fics centered around the unconventional relationship between two of America’s favorite mascots, who, unfortunately, aren’t accustomed to romance and seriousness.
- Words:
- 13,248
- Works:
- 6
- Bookmarks:
- 40
Recent bookmarks
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Summary
JEW BOX
Kyle stopped and just blinked in bewilderment. As far as he was aware, there was only one Jew that Cartman knew and could have a box dedicated to. Curious, he forgot about the pencil and dragged the box out from under the bed instead. It was quite hefty. He crouched over it on his knees, and he could see on the top, written across the lid in the same thick black marker as the writing on the side, was a warning.
DO NOT OPEN, ESPECIALLY IF YOU ARE A JEW, OR I WILL KICK YOUR ASS
Kyle checked over his shoulder. Cartman wasn't back yet, and Kyle couldn't hear his returning footsteps either. It was probably okay to take a quick peek inside then, just a little one…
Kyle opened the box.
*~*~*~*~*~*
When Kyle finds a curious box hidden under Cartman's bed, he thinks he knows what to expect from it. Though once he opens it, he rethinks everything he ever thought he knew.
(Title comes from the lyrics to Obsession by OK Go.)
Bookmarked by potatoes_tomatoes
02 Oct 2025
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Cartman never hits Kyle. Kyle doesn't know how to feel about that.
(Title comes from the lyrics to Ammunition by Krewella.)
Bookmarked by potatoes_tomatoes
13 Sep 2025
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One Saturday morning, somewhere at the playground, a ball hits the brick wall, bounces back against a boy's head, and then the boy's body hits the ground, motionless.
At any other place, that would be just another emergency, of course. A local case of a local family and local network of relatives and friends and doctors.
In South Park, that is a spark that lands on dry brushwood and old grass. A domino piece that falls on the row of other dominoes. You take it from there.
A boy loses his memory, a town loses its sanity, and Kyle Broflovski cannot make his goddamn mind.
Bookmarked by potatoes_tomatoes
08 Sep 2025
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“Like, stop getting into fights, dude.” Kyle sighed. “I mean, look at yourself. You look like fucking shit right now.”
Cartman blinked slowly. “Kyle.”
“Hm?” Kyle slid the needle easily.
“You’re the one that beat the shit out of me.”
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Cartman is pretty sure his dreams are windows into the future.
In them, he can see a fifty-year-old Kyle that has given up on him.
On top of that, when Cupid Me starts getting involved in his personal affairs of the heart, all hope seems lost.
Could he change the tides of fate?Bookmarked by potatoes_tomatoes
06 Aug 2025