Chapter Text
(Y/N) curled up in a ball bitterly, mumbling curses and angry rants under your breath in hopes of appeasing your bad mood. You had been in such a good mood this morning and now you were in a clusterfuck mess of emotions. You didn't see this happening to you when you woke up this morning and now you wish you could go back and make sure you avoided it altogether. You were currently hiding from your best friend Amelia, desperately locating yourself in a place she would never be able to find you. You and Amelia have been friends for a long time, practically inseparable from one another. Since the day you had met each other you were rarely seen apart from one another, she was your close confidant, your better half. You loved her to pieces and you told each other everything. Well so you thought anyway, but recently you had started to avoid her, keeping your distance intentionally until this mess all blew over.
You know that mushy plotline in every movie where two best friends fall in love with each other and everything was supposed to be magical. Yeah, that sort of thing had never happened to you. You ended up with a rotten apple instead of the happiness everyone else got. You fell under the spell of an evil witch instead of finding that happy ending everyone dreamed of. She lured you in and tricked you into a false sense of security and then left you. The magical fairy tale ending had been tempted to you and then proven to be fake all along. But luckily you had a best friend to help you back out of that mess, until you found yourself in a new one entirely. Life really seemed to enjoy screwing you over consistently.
God what you wish that you brought your earbuds so you could have been listening to music, yes you would have gotten into trouble with a teacher but so what? It would be worth it to be none the wiser about the conversation you overheard. Rumours amongst classmates was not uncommon, you found it everywhere you went, it was ingrained into society. But you had heard around from college classmates that Amelia had a crush on you. Though people joked about you being a couple all the time, something you were long since used to. You really just believed they were kidding, but you later learned that in fact it was true. You tried to laugh it off at first, not trying to take it seriously and just forget about it like nothing had changed. But the longer you left it, the worse it got, stewing away at the back of your mind like a slow burning fire until it grew out of control. You wondered how long she had been holding these feelings for you, when her crush on you had started and for what reason she had never told you about her crush.
You couldn't act normal around her, you couldn't help but wonder if small miniscule things friends did together somehow meant more to her. The stupid things that you notice more about someone when you have a crush on them. It only made you feel worse inside, like a poisonous leech feeding on your insecurities. You want to love her, you wanted to return her feelings more than anything. But you didn't want to ruin everything, you were so happy together, you were platonic soulmates and did everything together. But most of all, you knew you wouldn't be able handle being hurt all over again. Remembering how happy you had been back then and how easily everything had been torn from under your feet. You had once loved your (Ex GF/Crushes name) so deeply you thought you were soulmates. You seemed perfect for each other, like it was fate for you to have met. But then they betrayed you, ripping out your beating heart and stomping it under their heel. They broke your heart, they betrayed your love to them. They took advantage of your feelings and trust, taking away a piece from you as they did so. They selfishly broke you and while they went on with their life, they left you scared to love. No matter whom swayed your feelings, whom became the new object of your affections, the past trauma of hurt made you afraid to open up to someone else ever again.
You had cried over every small thing, somehow they were all you could think about. Asking why it happened, why they did that to you, how they could do that. Questioning everything and even unable to go through the day without spacing out. But Amelia had been right by your side the whole way, distracting your misery and making you smile again. Without her you would have been a mess, so how could she betray you like this? How could she have fallen in love with you and make you feel so confused all over again. You wanted to be mad at her, but you couldn't. You were mad that everything felt ruined now.
Amelia was honestly the most wonderful girl you had ever met, like a dream could true. Which is what scared you, when a person seemed too good to be true they often were in your case. She was protective, enthusiastic and optimistic, forever looking out for you, always eager to try new things and always looking on the bright side. But she had a habit of being naive and dealing with her problems using violence and honestly her hot-headed temper often got her into trouble. But she was still your best friend, you knew that she was harmless and a total softy underneath it all. She was one of the most popular girls in school, she was able to befriend anyone she came into contact with, that or get into a heated rivalry due to her sometimes obnoxious attitude or lack of self aware. But you still cared about her, she was really important to you. You would rather stay friends and allow your heart to heal, you wouldn't allow yourself to love Amelia and fall into another heartache.
She never let you feel alone or insecure, she always stood up for you when others tried to harass you. She was always trying to find buddy activities for you to go together, if you couldn't come she would tell you all about it afterwards. However, you would always tease her when she was clueless or when she got too carried away, but it was always in good fun. Amelia didn't have a bad bone in her body, her personality just clashed with others is all. But she never let her popularity get the better of her, she was never one of those bitchy girls. But that was something you had always admired about her. Which made you feel worse about hiding.
But you couldn't sit out here forever, you had to move sometime. When you were sure it was safe and you didn't have to hide anymore, you tried to sneak out inconspicuously. Wanting to remain as quiet as possible as to not get caught, that way you could avoid any awkward confrontations about questions you would rather avoid. But most of all so you wouldn't run into Amelia, you just wanted to go home and forget. Wait this out until people stopped gossiping about it. Deep down, you knew you could be happy with Amelia, she would treat you like a princess. But you couldn't risk it, you didn't want to fall in love only for your heart to be broken all over again.
It was better this way, it was safer this way. Things staying the way they always had, just the two of you against the world and being besties. Purely platonic and it would stay that way no matter what. Romance was out of the question and it had to stay that way. Falling in love with each other would be a mistake and only end badly for you in the long run, you didn't think your heart could handle it a second time around. The consequences were not an option.
You were so sure you would get away, until a familiar voice broke the silence. "(Y/N) there you are! I've been looking all over for you!" Amelia called in relief. You were really good at playing hide and seek. You must have practice at sneaking around so nobody found you, it took hours for her to find your hiding place. She had been tempted to ask England, Japan and even Germany to help find you, she had thought of every possible place you could be until she finally found you. She sure didn't want to play this game again any time soon.
You panicked, your body instantly turning rigid like an animal being hunted by a predator. Like a deer in the headlights of an oncoming truck, the fear welling up inside of you. You peaked out of the corner of your eye to see the worry in her big blue orbs. She knew you had been you'd been avoiding her and you could see the hurt on her face. You shifted awkwardly under her gaze, guilt welling up inside of you. You swallowed nervously, mustering up the courage to find your voice "Sorry Amelia I... I gotta go" you babbled anxiously. You really just wanted to forget about this whole thing, you wouldn't risk your friendship over a stupid crush. She meant too much to you to lose, she had helped you heal after your ex, which you were so grateful for.
You could laugh this whole situation off later, lie about the whole thing. Say it was a prank or something bad had been going and you needed time alone. Anything but the truth about you knowing she was in love with you. You just couldn't accept that. Hell, part of you was sure this was a crazy dream and you had fallen asleep and you would soon wake up. This just couldn't be happening to you, it just couldn't, nothing good ever happened to you when it came to love.
Amelia worried expression turned to a pained one, hurt now showing more blatantly. Why were you acting so weird, why were you pushing her away like this so suddenly? It made no sense at all. What did she do wrong to make you hate her so much? Why wouldn't you talk to her? Weren't you supposed to be best friends? They told each other everything. She hated to use force for any reason at all, but you wouldn't talk to her any other way. She gripped her hands into balled fists. "Damn it (Y/N), talk to me! Why are you avoiding me? Don't lie, I'm not stupid. Tell me the truth! she demanded her voice filled with pained anger. You used to be so close, always together no matter what. But lately you'd been acting so cold and sulky towards her, she didn't understand what caused the abrupt shift in your personality.
You stiffened, the walls you put up now shattering under your feet like glass. The emotions you held back so bravely now pooling out like a tidal wave upon the sand. Tears welling up in pools, your eyes now carrying the reflection like glass. Why did this have to happen again? Wasn't once already bad enough? "I heard... classmates. You... you love me" you babbled in a broken voice. Trying so hard to hide the fact that you were crying. You had tried to hard to be brave, to hide, to ignore it all but you couldn't anymore.
Amelia blushed, her cheeks darkening like a strawberry. How did you find out about that? Prussia or France must have been gossiping again, she was going to kill them for this. "Shit..." she cursed under her breath. She had wanted to tell you how she felt for so long, not for you to find out like this. But she couldn't do anything about it now, she had to face the music. She took a deep breath "I know your ex hurt you (Y/N). It's hard to love someone again when you've had your heart broken by someone else. But I was there when you were broken, it's my job as the heroine to save you, right? So I thought hiding my feelings until you were ready would be best. But all I did was push you away".
She remembered how you couldn't stop crying for weeks, anything would set you off into uncontrolled sobs. How every little thing reminded you of them, how you spaced out. How your eyes were so dead, empty and full of sadness. She remembered it all and how much it hurt to see you like that, how long it took to bring back a smile to your face. Because she had been right by your side, hating to see the girl she loved feeling like that because of someone else.
You felt your cheeks heat with embarrassment, Amelia really cared about you. The sincere tenderness in her voice said it all, those big blue eyes of hers were so full of love for you. She was such a kind person sometimes it hurt. You knew Amelia was the girl who would make you smile and laugh. "B... But I.... I don't know... I'm scared... you're my best friend Amelia. If.. If I lose you... I'll lose my best friend, not just my girlfriend" you sniffed tearfully. You didn't know where this road would lead and you worried it would end badly for you both.
Amelia softened, now it all made sense. Now she understood why you had tried to run away from her, she loosened her grip on you. "(Y/N) look at me" she replied her tone nearly begging you. She wanted you to feel safe, the only thing she had ever wanted was for you to be happy again. She knew she could be that person. Yes, she was your best friend which is why she knew you best of all, why you were perfect for each other.
You hesitated, before turning to look her in the face, stunned when she pulled you into an abrupt bear hug. Pressing your face into her chest so you couldn't see the uncool facial expression she was making. She had never been good at this sort of mushy stuff, but she had never cared about another person like she had you before. "I'm no good at romance, mushy stuff isn't my forte. But whenever I see you laugh or smile, my brain turns to mush. When you started to avoid me, I went crazy worrying about you. I dunno... I just... shit I sound so uncool".
God, if you hadn't been blushing already. You swore despite being outside it suddenly felt much warmer than it did before. You'd never seen Amelia act this uncool around anyone before, it was admittedly pretty adorable. Seeing her all flustered and embarrassed, you couldn't help but start to smile. A small laugh escaping your lips. You nuzzled affectionately against her, the scent of her lynx deodorant and hot dogs on her. She had always preferred men's deodorant. "We were both stupid, but at least we have no secrets now" you chuckled.
Amelia sighed and smiled bashfully, she had to agree there. Honestly it had been so long since you were together like this, she had missed it like crazy. But it felt so right holding you in her arms like this. "Stupid in love" she mumbled. The two of you stood there together, just hugging. Your arms wrapped tightly around each other as if letting go would suddenly cause you to spontaneously combust or something crazy like that. Amelia didn't know what to do with herself, she was pouting but happier than she had been in a long time. You were still crying a little, you couldn't help it. There were so many emotions running through you right now, it was hard to handle. But you knew one thing, you were happy and it was getting harder not to laugh.