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Fine, do you want the honest truth? People don’t think of him as smart, but Nandor knows a lot more than he lets on.
For example, Nandor knew almost right away that Guillermo wasn’t cut out to be a vampire.
Post-Season 5 finale.
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When you took a job as a familiar in a vampire household, falling in love was the last thing you expected—especially with Nandor the Relentless, a centuries-old warrior vampire with a flare for dramatics and a surprising tenderness beneath his armor.
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An account of the events that took place at Panera Bread, Staten Island, circa 2009
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How Guillermo de la Cruz became a familiar to Vampire Nandor the Relentless
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The year is 2009, twenty-year-old Guillermo de la Cruz is toiling away at Panera Bread when he's introduced to the hottest new dating app on the market.
Is this the start of something beautiful?
Knowing Grindr, probably not.
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Laszlo Cravensworth, an up and coming film director, hires recent film school graduate Guillermo de la Cruz to shoot his next project, a documentary about a series of small town murders and the local vampire legend surrounding them. Joining them are Laszlo’s long time collaborators: his wife, Nadja Antipaxos, a stellar editor with a penchant for perfection, and his best friend, Nandor Jahan, a keen-eyed cinematographer with his own reasons for taking a back seat on this project. Rounding out their team is studio man Colin Robinson, in charge of keeping their budget balanced and ascertaining risk.
As the investigation kicks into high gear, the crew finds themselves entangled in a dark mystery spanning the whole course of the town’s history, uncovering secrets about foul truths that lurk within the heart of Coventry, truths that may have been better left buried. And it’s not just the town that has skeletons; the crew members have their own secrets that could threaten their careers, their relationships, maybe even their very lives.
One thing’s for certain: no one escapes Coventry unchanged. Whether for good or ill all depends on how far you’re willing to go to reveal the truth, and what - or who - you believe in.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 159,765
- Chapters:
- 41/45
- Comments:
- 566
- Kudos:
- 379
- Bookmarks:
- 97
- Hits:
- 13,007
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The Big Bloody Bake-Off by IKeepForgettingMyLines for hmjorts, returnofthelu
Fandoms: What We Do in the Shadows (TV)
20 Jan 2023
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Guillermo De La Cruz and Nandor “The Relentless” are two intense hobbyist bakers, facing off against each other and five other (not quite as) passionate and culinarily-inclined locals in a fierce competition (aired on local cable TV, no less). After a full week of baking challenges, they’ll see who among them can make the most crave-able confectioneries themed around the spookiest season.
Will the heat of the kitchen prove too much for our competitors? Will affection bloom between bakers as they hash out rivalries in between rounds of baking cookies? Will our hosts manage to stop flirting long enough to interview even a single contender? All this and more, in The Big Bloody Bake Off!
COMPLETE!
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 75,116
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 95
- Kudos:
- 173
- Bookmarks:
- 40
- Hits:
- 2,921
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You can’t seem to hold me, can’t seem to let me go by dreamingofmemo
Fandoms: What We Do in the Shadows (TV)
04 Nov 2025
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“Wait, so you asked the genie-
“The djinn”
-to make it so that Marwa liked what you liked?”
“That is what I just said!”Guillermo spoke slowly and with trepidation, fiddling with his hands.
“Okay, so if you liked… someone, Marwa would like them too?
“Guillermo, it is early and I wish to slumber. Please close the lid and get out of here.”
-and if you wanted to kiss someone, Marwa would also want that?”
“What is your point here?”Or: Guillermo confronts Nandor about Marwa’s advances after the wedding. It does not go well.
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Nandor’s not great at talking about his feelings. Luckily, every time he screws up a confession, he just makes Guillermo forget it. He’ll get it right eventually.
There’s just one minor problem with this plan: Guillermo, unbeknownst to him, has developed an immunity to mind wiping.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,237
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 115
- Kudos:
- 4,673
- Bookmarks:
- 549
- Hits:
- 31,340
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The household begins to plan their coup against The Counselor and adjusts to the arrival of Nandor's sister, Ziba.
Series
- Part 2 of The Missing Seasons
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نحوه نگارش مزخرفه
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Set 6 months after the end of season 4, this is my personal prediction/hope for how season 5 could go, written as if they were real episodes. Some are comics brought over from my other socials (episodes 1 and 8), and the rest are in script format. Also, some episode plots (episodes 4 and 6) are based on vague leaks from the set, but the rest of it is purely my own speculation and/or headcanon!
Newly turned into a Dhampir, Guillermo returns to the mansion and finds it in disarray; Nadja is flipping burgers and avoiding the Guide's requests to help with the council, Laszlo is throwing himself into research to try and explain Colin's life cycle, and Nandor, having spent the last half year cooped up in the library, is eager to write his own memoir. But all Guillermo cares about is gaining the respect he believes he now deserves.
Series
- Part 1 of The Missing Seasons
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Bookmark Notes:
To read list
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Bookmark Notes:
What season 5 should've been smh
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I Love You More Than I Meant To by warmheartseek
Fandoms: What We Do in the Shadows (TV)
19 Sep 2022
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Guillermo doesn't understand why Nandor had a problem with Guillermo being happy--Nandor shows him exactly why.
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Nandor has been unlucky in love for years, seeking solace in his friends and coworkers at the occult apothecary he's been working at since his divorce nearly a decade ago. He feels his luck change, however, when he begins falling hard for his anonymous romantic pen pal - lovingly referred to as his "Dear Friend".
That is, until he finds out that his Dear Friend is actually the stubborn, frustrating, brilliant, beautiful new employee, Guillermo de la Cruz - and Nandor has no idea what to do about it. Good thing he's got his coworkers to help him figure it all out.
She Loves Me/WWDITS AU!
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 30,729
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 58
- Kudos:
- 160
- Bookmarks:
- 31
- Hits:
- 1,851
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For a Chance to Dance With You by vampireshmampire (thekumquat)
Fandoms: What We Do in the Shadows (TV)
30 Mar 2023
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After being turned by the Baron at Nandor's wedding, Guillermo is vampire royalty. It can be lonely at the top, so the Baron throws a masquerade ball, inviting all vampires (of suitable status, of course) to try and win the hand of Guillermo de la Cruz.
Guillermo wants to be loved for himself, not fought over by vampires angling to use a relationship for power and prestige. Surely there's someone here who understands that?
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"Guillermo couldn’t see Nandor’s shit-eating grin, because of the whole vampires-not-reflecting-in-mirrors thing, but he could feel his mouth curling up at the corners. Arrogant dick. "
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Guillermo & Nandor visit the gym
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wwdits kinktober day 19: stuck kink - obedience training - size difference
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8,873
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 5
- Kudos:
- 23
- Bookmarks:
- 2
- Hits:
- 333
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Bookmark Notes:
Mmmmm, emotionally constipated vampires
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or, Five Times Guillermo Fails to Have Sex with Nandor + One Time They Make Love
Series
- Part 2 of take courage
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drag me to death like a lit cigarette by LizLimone998
Fandoms: What We Do in the Shadows (TV)
12 Oct 2025
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A remarkable new phase of development by LizLimone998
Fandoms: What We Do in the Shadows (TV)
11 Oct 2025
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What happens in the underground crime-fighting lair
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Guillermo had always been fun to mess with.
Something about him just invited fuckery. All that repression with a glimmer of something fiery and fierce under the careful layers of composure and constructed subservience. Nandor greatly enjoyed chipping at the psychological armour, teasing out the hothead that lurked within.
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Nandor makes a happy misjudgement
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This was all it was, Nandor reasoned with himself. Just one moment of weakness. Except that it kept happening. Time meant very little for an immortal but before he knew it, he couldn’t imagine a life without Guillermo by his side.
Or: three times that Nandor revealed he cared for Guillermo more than what was proper for a vampire.