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The One Where They Play The Pocky Game by im_always_stressed for codesandstuffs
Fandoms: Dream SMP
30 Jul 2025
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Summary
“Okay, so you hold it between your teeth,” Quackity said, around the piece of pocky in his mouth. “And the idea is you take tiny nibbles, movin’ up the stick, until—Holy Fucking Shit, Sapnap, again?” He sat back on his bed, removing the cookie stick from his mouth and waving an exasperated hand at his boyfriend. “Do you put anything in your mouth and immediately fucking bite down?”
Series
- Part 21 of Battleship
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Just To Get A Glimpse Beyond This Illusion by im_always_stressed for these_godforsaken_halls
Fandoms: Hermitcraft SMP
30 Jul 2025
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Summary
Cold autumn wind slipped in through the cracks of this castle, scudding little leaves along the floor as Grian and Scar were marched in chains down the corridor.
It wasn’t like the restraints did much with both of them already admin-locked into adventure mode, but the people on this server did like their little shows of power. Scar held onto Grian’s arm for balance as he walked, concentrating on one foot after another and not tripping over the metal between his feet.
A guard cuffed him on the back of the head. “Hurry up, rogue,” the man said, driving Scar into a stumbling few steps further.
Scar blinked at the guard, words bubbling on the tip of his tongue.
OR: Scar and Grian have ended up the prisoner of a Cubfan who is not very like their Cubfan at all.
Series
- Part 14 of Battleship
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sometimes it's grey, sometimes it's sunny by im_always_stressed for RavenDarkwood
Fandoms: QSMP | Quackity SMP
05 Jul 2025
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Summary
Phil rounded the corner in time to see a plant-hybrid whose right arm ended just above the elbow use a sword in his other arm to stab a guard through the chest. He was wearing the same gown Phil was wearing, and he had a lot more scars than the last time Phil had seen him.
“Goodbye,” Etoiles said, pulling his sword back and kicking the guard away. “No one will miss you because you are terrible.” He whirled, alert for new threats, and took in the man standing in the doorway, pregnant, bloody, and armed. A broad grin crossed his face. “Philipe Minecraft, the GOAT, you are here too! The bros are together again. You look terrible, what have they been doing to you?”
It looked like there had been five guards by this chamber, and they were all now dead. “Thanks,” Phil said dryly. “Didn’t leave any fun for for me, I see.” He gestured to his swollen belly. “They’ve been eggin’ me. Are the kids here?”
Or: Phil is finally escaping, but these contractions chose a really inconvenient time to appear.
Series
- Part 10 of Battleship
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you say you're no good (but you're good to me) by im_always_stressed for CatInTheVoid
Fandoms: Dream SMP
05 Jul 2025
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Summary
It was rarely good when Phil got called into the overseer’s office, but it was usually fewer people to handle, at least. Easier to have to please his owner and the man’s guests than to be passed around the guardhouse again, or to be used as entertainment for whatever group of miners had pleased their bosses best this week. If he navigated things carefully and was lucky, sometimes after he had done his job he got fed tidbits of fancy food—dishes made with spices, or vegetables that hadn’t been cooked to an indistinguishable pulp, or real meat—or got to sit on a cushion in a corner. When he limped into the room, it was with what passed for hope, nowadays, glowing in Phil’s chest.
There was a piglin hybrid there, a tall and muscled man with an enchanted greataxe on his back. He had scars that spoke of a life of violence across his face, and his hands on his weapons were large and blunt. He looked angry already.
“—we don’t have the funds to pay you this week,” the overseer was saying, tone unconcerned. “But we’ve come up with an alternative. The bird’s market value is worth about what we owed you, so we’ll just give it to you and call it even.”
OR: Phil is given to a new owner. He doesn't expect it to go well.
Series
- Part 9 of Battleship
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Maybe I'll Feel This Way Forever by im_always_stressed for mothandflame
Fandoms: Dream SMP
05 Jul 2025
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Summary
Phil stepped inside and closed the door behind him, inhaled, and stiffened. There was movement a rooms-length away, small sounds bouncing off a tile floor. The clink of a spoon against ceramic, the rustle of fabric as a body shifted. He wasn’t alone in this so-called safe-house he was supposed to be hiding from his enemies in, and over his own blood and sweat, he could smell magic. The iron and dust of vampire powers, split wood and wet stone of fae magic, sunlight mingled with crushed grass that wasn’t coming from him—the telltale traces of a dozen different uses were present, but he could only hear one person breathing. At the other end of the hallway, bare feet brushed the floor and a deep voice spoke.
“Bruh, you look terrible.”
There was a wizard in the safe house. Phil bared his teeth. The fact that he couldn’t fucking see was making the hair on the back of his neck rise. “Didn’t ask for your fuckin’ opinion, caster.”
OR: Werewolf Phil takes refuge in a safe house. He is not pleased that there's someone already there.
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Been Pulling Every String (Looking For The End) by im_always_stressed for ace_sinister
Fandoms: Minecraft (Video Game), Crossover Fandom
22 Jun 2025
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Summary
Final speech given, her teacher was packing up her computer after class. Gem hovered a few steps back, unsure what the next move was, exactly. She had her points ready to go, but did she just start talking like this– just go? Surely Professor Minecraft had seen her. Did she wait to be acknowledged? She didn’t have a good script for seducing her college professor– any examples she’d found of how it worked were clearly dumb. Gem scuffed her shoe across the floor, messenger bag pulled to her chest.
Or: the discord said we needed someone to write one more autistic character and I was like GOT you.
Series
- Part 1 of Battleship
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Summary
Amid the dream, Technoblade stood over him in full armour, eyes intent, an ender chest in his hand. “Dream, c’mon. Dream we gotta get out of here, Phil’s waitin’ outside.”
Dream grinned at him, the expression slowly growing over his face as he looked upwards. Techno appeared in his dreams a lot. “Leavin’ so soon? Stay in and I’ll show you a good time, dude.”
A piece of armour thunked into his chest. “Spent my time in here and I wouldn’t call most of it good, really. Let’s get you home and we’ll talk about it. Put that on, we gotta move.”
Dream blinked down at the armour he was holding. Enchanted netherite breastplate, the design with the neck guard and the shoulder pauldrons, part of a full set that was lying on the obsidian next to him. That was new.
And Techno hadn’t told him he was smart and clever and sexy, like he normally did when Dream hit on him in his dreams. This wasn’t going at all like it usually did. Was he—
Or: Techno breaks Dream out of Pandora's Vault. But some wounds will keep hurting you long after they heal.
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the whole world it is sleeping (but my world is you) by im_always_stressed
Fandoms: Dream SMP
20 Mar 2025
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Summary
Snow scraped over the roof and wind tugged at the eaves. Phil was sprawled next to him, taking up an incredible amount of mattress for a small man. Techno settled down into the bed again, curving an arm around his husband and pulling him closer.
Phil made a disgruntled noise at the movement, and then tucked himself into Techno’s side, arm slipping around his waist. “Mmmmm. Mornin’?”
Or: When the weather's gonna be like that, and the man you love is next to you here, sometimes it's really difficult to get out of bed.
Day Five: Winter
Series
- Part 5 of Techza Week 2025
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Summary
r/essempi · Posted by u/birdmandave 2 days ago.
Possible Soulmate Downtown
Was going home from work on friday, and I think I met my soulmate somewhere on the p-train, cause I’ve been seeing in colour since then, which has been wild as fuck, turns out apples are all different, it’s way easier to tell them apart now that I can see that. Anyways I was looking at my phone, so I didn’t realize until I was getting off, lmao. And then there was the sunset, stared at that for a while. Honestly had kinda figured I didn’t have a soulmate cause it’s been a while so this has been a surprise, lol.Rail was late (cause of course it fucking was) so it was a train somewhere between 6:30 and 7:10 I think, on the prime line, and I travelled from pandora to community, so I guess we were on the train together in that time? If you are also seeing in colour since then, let me know, I guess?
Edit: It was fucking 36 degrees with humidity on friday, yeah I had my sleeves pushed up. So did everybody else on the train, it was a FUCKING HEAT WAVE.
Or: a post on r/essempi's relationships tab
Day Three: Soulmates
Series
- Part 3 of Techza Week 2025
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Summary
It felt like it had taken almost as long to get here as it had taken to get to the world in the first place, but they’d made it to the land, Techno had claimed it, and they’d successfully made a base. He was managing everything okay. “Okay, that’s good.” Techno exhaled, shoulders dropping. “And I’m goin’ to bed.”
“We have to eat supper though, right?” Phil glanced at him. “You can’t go to bed with no fuckin’ food, you’ll get sick.”
That just wasn’t true. “No you won’t, you just can’t do it every time. Just once is fine. I go to bed with no supper all the time,” Techno told him.
Phil pressed his lips together. “Well I don’t think we should start off in our new house with no food.” He patted his pockets. “I have some apples, you can eat an apple. I have meat, too.”
OR: AE duo is 11, and married for paperwork, and spending the first night in their new base.
Day Two: Cooking
Series
- Part 2 of Tiny Antarctic Empire Adventures
- Part 2 of Techza Week 2025
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Summary
“Oh, you’re done.” The brute stood up. He gestured behind him, to the double bed covered in a slippery padded comforter. There were pillows on it, and he wasn’t used to sleeping with those either. “Bed’s here, you can go to sleep.” He rubbed a hand over his mouth. He’d been clenching his jaw. “We’ll plan what to do next in the morning, but we should probably just go to bed.”
The hawk looked at him, and then behind him, hands moving restlessly where they were hidden by the folded towel. “I’m in the bed?” He tipped his head to the side, expression giving nothing away. He was shorter than the brute, and had to look up at him with intent blue eyes.
“Well, yeah,” the brute said. “We’re both in the bed.” A comforter, pillows, someone else—that would all be different from a thin mattress pad over concrete. But they had escaped and were going to be people now. They should sleep in the bed.
“Or I sleep on the floor,” the hawk suggested. He raised his eyebrows very slightly, considering. “But you need me in the bed?”
Or: Techno and Phil are dehumanized weapons who've broken out of captivity, but there is only one bed. And sharing a bed comes with— expectations.
Day One: Bed
Series
- Part 1 of high in the sunlit silence
- Part 1 of Techza Week 2025
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Summary
The first time Phil hugs him, he doesn’t know what to do. They have broken out of the Vault and Techno is covered in his shadows, and Phil isn’t afraid of him. Phil puts his arms around him and presses his face into his shoulder, and it’s like having his shadows crowd close, but better. Phil is warm, and Techno can feel his breathing, and he doesn’t have to stay close to Techno like the shadows do, but he does it anyways. Techno curls his arms around his friend and holds him, and then they hold hands when they walk into the city as free men. They eat junk food and Phil laughs with a smudge of orange dust on his cheek, and Techno thinks that he wants to see Phil laugh every day of his life.
Or: Technoblade and the man he loves, and learning what their love looks like.
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Summary
Techno forced a smile, even though he felt more like closing himself into a dark room where no one could look at him. “So we’ve got to get more roommates, or find a new lease. And I was thinkin’, we’re pretty good friends, right? Do you want to get a place together?”
Phil glanced at the jewellery, and then up at Techno again. “You got me earrings to ask about movin’ in together?”
OR: Techno and Phil become Emduo.
Day Four: Emeralds
Series
- Part 4 of Phil + Techno Week 2024
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Summary
“Hi,” the person in the next seat said. Techno turned to look. A kid shorter than him was next to him, sitting forward on the seat to leave room for his fuzzy grey wings. “I’m Phil.”
OR: Travelling alone is hard if you're a kid. But what if you didn't have to be alone any more?
Day One: Childhood.
Series
- Part 1 of Phil + Techno Week 2024
- Part 1 of Tiny Antarctic Empire Adventures
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Summary
Philza nodded again. He took off his hat absently, ran a hand through his hair, and then plopped it back on his head again. “Mind if I keep you company?”
“Oh, of course not.” Missa shook his head. He eyed his husband, lit in the circle of illumination from the torches he had scattered around his enchanting basement. The avian looked exhausted, eyes sunken and tension in the lines of his body. “You are always welcome, you know that.”
Philza smiled briefly at him— and Missa firmly squashed down how that made his heart skip a beat— and stepped closer, carefully stepping across the redstone lines on the floor of Missa’s enchanting space. He paused, looking at Missa. “Do you mind if I warm ya up as well?”
Missa blinked at him. It was a chilly night in his basement, but he was dressed for it. “¿Que?” He tilted his head to the side.
__Written for the Kinktober prompts Cockwarming/Tender
Series
- Part 13 of 2023 Kinktober
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Summary
Philza had found what he was looking for and was holding a length of leather. A collar. He grinned ruefully at the other man. “I’m not so sure about that, I get fucked up pretty bad sometimes.”
“The details, they are unimportant,” Etoiles told him. He held very still as Philza approached with the collar. Etoiles’ heart sped up at the sight of it, dangling from Philza’s hand. He wanted that, he wanted this. “Philza is always prepared when it counts,” he told him, eyes flicking between Philza’s face and the leather in his hands. “You are blocking, you are parrying, you have high cpm.” He swallowed. “Please?”
Philza held out the collar. “You want this?” He raised his eyebrows, and then at Etoiles’ eager nod he continued. “You want to put it on or I put it on you?”
“You,” Etoiles told him, tipping his head to the side to expose his neck. “Please.”
__Written for the Kinktober prompt Petplay
Series
- Part 12 of 2023 Kinktober
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Summary
Techno looked at him, level consideration in those red eyes, and Phil looked miserably back. He still had blood on his cheek from where a chip of stone had nicked him, he was pretty sure, and slime had gotten in his hair when he’d snuck in through the sewers. He probably looked like a disaster. Techno looked fine, as always, more than fine. Seven feet of muscle and pink hair and tusks, even with some mud and blood on him from the fight.
Techno drained his water and held out a hand to Phil. “C’mere.”
Unsure what was happening, Phil took the proffered hand, his dwarfed by Techno’s.
Techno tugged him towards the bathroom. “C’mon, let’s take a shower.” He dropped Phil’s hand and rooted around under the sink, coming out with a disk of something he dropped in the shower. He turned on the water and gestured to Phil. “Clothes off, unless you wanna get that stuff wet.”
__Written for the Kinktober rompts Praise Kink/Shower Sex
Series
- Part 10 of 2023 Kinktober
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Long Night (Rolling In Each Other's Arms) by im_always_stressed
Fandoms: Philza Hardcore - Fandom
17 Oct 2023
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Summary
Philza gasped upright at the centre of the clearing, redstone and charcoal smeared up his arms. There was another person who looked just like him pushing himself upright next to him, and another beyond him, and another. “Oh jesus fuck, it worked,” Philza said.
The nearest figure who looked like him sat upright and raked a hand over his face. He was wearing an outfit very similar to Philza’s robes and hat, but in red. He glanced around the clearing and his lip curled into a smirk. “What, we all fuckin’ colour-coordinated?”
“Hey, yellow’s a good colour,” someone said indignantly, at the same time as someone else protested that “I like blue,” and “Pink’s a fun colour.” and “You got a problem with purple?”
“What’s wrong with green?” Philza said. He raised his eyebrows. “Looks like you went so fuckin’ hard into red that you’ve got a decorative edge on your dagger there.”
The red guy sneered at him. “It’s blood.”
Philza snorted. “It isn’t.”
__Written for the Kinktober Prompts Ritual/Double Penetration In Two Holes/Cloning & Selfcest
Series
- Part 9 of 2023 Kinktober
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Summary
“I happen to know that of your roommates–” Wilbur counted on his fingers. “Skeppy is staying over with Bad for the end of the week, and Calvin’s going to Seattle for the break.” He smiled hopefully. “So you have the apartment to yourself.”
Techno dumped some of the markdown pumpkin spice creamer Calvin had bought the house into his coffee and sipped at it. The adrenaline focus that had gotten him through the last hour was levelling out. He felt loose-limbed. “You gonna do somethin’ with that, or you just break in to be annoyin’?” He raised his eyebrows over the edge of the coffee cup.
“I will have you know,” Wilbur retorted. “Skeppy told me where the spare key was when I told him that I was your emergency contact, I entered this building perfectly legally.”
Techno stared at him, and Wilbur threw up his hands.
“Yes, fine, I wondered if you wanted to have sex.”
__Written for the Kinktober Prompts Vibrator/Overstimulation/Sensory Deprivation
Series
- Part 8 of 2023 Kinktober
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Summary
The blond man’s eyes crinkle over the top of his mask, but pink-hair– Techno’s– eyebrows go up. His eyebrows aren’t pink. He pulls out a communicator and looks at it, then at Sapnap. “This is room 204, right? We have a reservation.”
“Oh yeah, you’re here for the full week cause you’re coming in from Boreal Sector.” Sapnap nods. A pause stretches out, with both of them looking at each other. “I come with the room,” he offers by way of explanation.
The blond guy cough-laughs into his hand. Techno looks down him. “Phil?”
Phil spreads his hands. “This place was the cheapest! I didn’t– they said it came with room entertainment–” (“That’s me,” Sapnap contributed.) “--but I thought they meant like a fuckin’ media station or some shit, not a guy.” He pulls off his coat and looks around for a place to hang it. He’s not as built as his friend, but he’s got angles and lean muscle Sapnap wouldn’t mind getting his hands on.
__Written for the Kinktober prompts Sex Work/Tattoos.
Series
- Part 7 of 2023 Kinktober