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Protective Factors by Milenia452
Fandoms: Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types, Heated Rivalry (TV)
28 Jun 2026
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Following a near-fatal suicide attempt, Ilya Rozanov is admitted to Calder Ward. He speaks almost exclusively Russian, refuses interpreters, and answers most questions with shrugs or silence. Staff struggle to establish even the most basic details of his life. Why he attempted suicide, who he left a note for, and what he has lost remain mysteries.
Across the ward, Shane Hollander is fighting a different battle. Intelligent, anxious, and trapped by an eating disorder, he attempts to maintain rigid control over food, exercise, and his body even as his health deteriorates. Despite increasing concern from staff, he struggles to recognise the severity of his illness.
As clinicians search for answers, the story reveals that recovery is rarely driven by dramatic breakthroughs. Instead, it emerges through trust, routine, patience, and human connection.Told entirely through clinical documentation, ward notes, emails, assessments, and multidisciplinary discussions.
Bookmarked by FicAddict88
29 Jun 2026
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Pushing it Down and Praying by mar1p0sa_papp1l0n
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
13 Mar 2026
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Ilya's stepmother dies during Shane's second year in Ottawa. That's when the nightmares start. And in the nightmares, there's something heavy and tight sitting on his chest. Something cold, something he's felt before. In the nightmares, he's thirteen and shivering and willing himself to fall asleep, to teleport one day further away from everything. He’s thirteen and someone’s lips are wet and cold on the shell of his ear. He’s thirteen and he's completely frozen. Someone’s standing over him and he needs to move, needs to get away, needs to hit and kick and scream, but his pants are coming off and he can’t hit her, can’t kick her, and the scream is dead in his throat. His mother raised him to never hit a woman, and so in his nightmares he closes his eyes, grimaces at the light that seeps through anyways, and waits.
________________________________________________
A death brings unwanted memories back. Ilya struggles to remember, then struggles to forget. Shane struggles to get through to Ilya before it's too late.Bookmarked by FicAddict88
28 Jun 2026
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That Old Black Hole by begonias
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
30 Jun 2026
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Galina makes it a point to remind Ilya that people aren’t mind readers, and unfortunately, if there’s something wrong, he has to actually communicate this. He's aware of this. He is. Even though it's always been so much easier said than done, even on a good day.
But when the unthinkable happens, Shane ends up seriously injured, and Ilya can't bring himself to reckon with his role in it all, or how they'll move forward.
Now it's all the more impossible to communicate the weight of his guilt, the feelings of inadequacy, and the all-consuming fear that Shane might not survive.
Alternatively, life as everyone knows it falls apart when Shane takes a bullet that was meant for Ilya.
Bookmarked by FicAddict88
27 Jun 2026
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And yeah, Shane knew that Ilya hadn’t been okay last time he was in Russia, but Ilya had had the very real excuse of a funeral to blame things on. Ilya had downplayed it as much as he could, and Shane hadn’t been there, he’d heard the fatigue and he’d seen Ilya’s tired smile, but he hadn’t felt the way Ilya’s hands were cold the entire time he was there, hadn’t seen through the screen the way Ilya dropped eight pounds in three weeks, hadn’t kept time when there were twenty hours in Ilya’s day instead of something closer to sixteen. Or, on the flip side, for the week or two after, when there had been approximately ten conscious hours in a day.
It was one thing to see something. It was another to feel it in your hands.
Ilya and Shane are so, so happy for their first year married. They’re playing in Ottawa together, they’re fucking winning, they’re together and out.
So now, after a year, Ilya should be fine. He should be great. He should not be flinching at small noises or nearly punching people off the clock or feeling like he’s drowning whenever he’s not on the ice.
Or: Ilya Rozanov, meet your PTSD.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 50,093
- Chapters:
- 11/11
- Comments:
- 492
- Kudos:
- 1,005
- Bookmarks:
- 423
- Hits:
- 25,879
Bookmarked by FicAddict88
23 Jun 2026
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“Shane is playing the best season of his career in Boston. I’ve stepped away from hockey to focus on my therapy. We have a mare, a goat, a home, and on paper- everything should be perfect, yes? So why am I not okay?”
or: A direct continuation of the first part “That’s My Line.”
non-linear healing progress that moves forward, slips backward, and often feels chaotic and examines the tension between the desire to get better and the fear of falling apart.Series
- Part 3 of Between the Lines
Bookmarked by FicAddict88
21 Jun 2026
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"Is this your first time with a man?"
"Yeah. Yours?"
"Oh—no."
"Really?"
"Really."
"Who, another player?"
He stopped. He hesitated.
"no, my coach's son back in russia."Just as they begin to believe in something stable and lasting, a scandal erupts: a former Russian national team coach is exposed as a serial abuser, and images from Ilya’s past begin circulating in the media.
Series
- Part 1 of Between the Lines
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 107,765
- Chapters:
- 32/32
- Comments:
- 1,140
- Kudos:
- 3,341
- Bookmarks:
- 894
- Hits:
- 109,707
Bookmarked by FicAddict88
21 Jun 2026
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your presence has gone through me (like needle through a thread) by GatheringBlue
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
25 May 2026
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"We're setting you up with a billet situation," Fletcher continued. "It's pretty common for first-year players, especially international guys. Gives you a chance to settle in, learn the city, have someone looking out for you."
"Okay," Ilya said slowly, not entirely sure what a billet was, but not wanting to admit his ignorance.
He could guess from the context – he’d heard of rookies being assigned to live with older single players, veterans who could show them the ropes. Maybe that was what Fletcher meant. Connors maybe, he was probably a handful of years older than Ilya. Or perhaps Becker. Ilya just hoped it was someone who–
"You'll be staying with Nikolai Petrov and his family."
The words hit Ilya like a punch to the gut. For a moment, he forgot how to breathe.
"Petrov?" he managed, his voice coming out strangled.
__________________________________________________________________The Bears decide that Ilya should be set up with a billet for his first season. The idea of spending a year living with a man that Ilya is sure hates him is completely terrifying. And yet, it ends up being the best thing to ever happen to him.
Series
- Part 2 of heated rivalry fics
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 103,460
- Chapters:
- 12/?
- Comments:
- 2,624
- Kudos:
- 8,600
- Bookmarks:
- 3,134
- Hits:
- 241,143
Bookmarked by FicAddict88
16 Jun 2026
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Ilya gets the flu and his fever spikes high enough that he starts slipping into Russian, reliving memories of being punished for showing weakness as a kid. Shane doesn't understand the words, but he can hear the fear—and has to keep Ilya grounded while the fever works its way through his system.
Series
- Part 6 of heated rivalry sickfics
Bookmarked by FicAddict88
15 Jun 2026
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It was supposed to be a simple hookup. Shane drives to Pittsburgh after a road game, texts Ilya, expects the usual. Instead Ilya opens the door looking like death and refuses to admit anything is wrong. Neither of them know how to handle this because this isn't what they do.
Series
- Part 1 of heated rivalry sickfics
Bookmarked by FicAddict88
14 Jun 2026
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i need closure by pinkwallflowers
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
21 Jun 2026
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When allegations against a youth coach begin circulating online, most of the league treats it like a joke.
Ilya Rozanov laughs along with everyone else. Nothing bad happened to him, at least that’s what he's always believed.
Or, a look into Ilya Rozanov’s childhood and how it shaped him.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 87,996
- Chapters:
- 14/15
- Comments:
- 418
- Kudos:
- 1,255
- Bookmarks:
- 330
- Hits:
- 32,912
Bookmarked by FicAddict88
09 Jun 2026
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“You look terrible,” Shane says bluntly when he greets Ilya at the stairwell. “Are you hurting?”
Ilya shrugs. He is hurting, actually. The adrenaline from the win wore off somewhere between his texts with Shane and the medic’s second consult. His face feels swollen and it hurts to speak when he says, “I am not wilting daisy, Hollander. I can handle getting hit at hockey game.”
“Well, I’m glad you’re okay.”
A strange pang hits Ilya’s chest then, unassuming and small. Ilya chooses to think nothing of it.
////
Or Ilya Rozanov on pain, love, and family throughout the years.
Bookmarked by FicAddict88
07 Jun 2026
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Shane Hollander loves a plan. Unfortunately, all of his are falling apart, and on the day before hockey camps are set to start.
Series
- Part 1 of Moving Forward
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,327
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Comments:
- 104
- Kudos:
- 2,021
- Bookmarks:
- 312
- Hits:
- 24,236
Bookmarked by FicAddict88
30 May 2026
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it was the fever by Rozalov
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
28 Dec 2025
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Ilya has a stomach bug... the day of a game against Montreal
Bookmarked by FicAddict88
23 May 2026
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“I don’t think I really have an eating disorder, if I’m honest. I haven’t really had the uhm, you know, the thoughts that people get?” The need to control everything. Nick’s never had that urge.
“Then why are you here?”
“Because my rugby coach said it might be good for me?”
Dr. Walker hums, “But you don’t think you have an eating disorder?”
“Not… really, no. My boyfriend has anorexia or– had it? He’s in recovery now but…”
“That must have been difficult for you,” she says, breezing over the fact that Nick said boyfriend.
“It was,” he admits, “But we made it out the other side in one piece and he’s doing a lot better now. I’ve seen up close what disordered eating behaviors look like and how the thought patterns manifest, I guess.”
Her expression softens, “Anorexia can look different from person to person.”
Nick doesn’t know what to say to that. He just knows his body weight is too high to get diagnosed with it.
or
Nick develops a severe ED his second year at uni and there isn't enough googling in the world that will fix him.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 76,401
- Chapters:
- 24/24
- Comments:
- 147
- Kudos:
- 494
- Bookmarks:
- 101
- Hits:
- 21,688
Bookmarked by FicAddict88
08 Dec 2025
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made it out alive (but i think i lost it) by GoldenAvenger02
Fandoms: Heartstopper (Webcomic)
15 Nov 2024
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It hadn't occurred to him that he had never seen the visible reminder year nine had given Charlie.
And maybe, that was why the voice of Charlie's mother full of sniffling accompanied by a shaky, "Nick? I need to speak with your mother" caught him so off guard.
Bookmarked by FicAddict88
10 Aug 2025
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Hold Me (Don't Leave Me) by Franklyfrank
Fandoms: Heartstopper (TV), Heartstopper (Webcomic)
26 Nov 2024
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Nick is clinging on for dear life.
How I imagine that the whole of the Halloween party went in S3 E4.
Bookmarked by FicAddict88
10 Aug 2025
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mistaking candles for headlights by yell0wjacket for Impala_Chick
Fandoms: Generation Kill
23 Dec 2020
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you meet people you love them and then you lose them and you never see them again. and it's inevitable and it happens to everyone and there's nothing you can do about it— someone has to leave first. it’s a very old story, and there is no other version of it.
Heavy Artillery Holiday Echange 2020
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,385
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 5
- Kudos:
- 73
- Bookmarks:
- 6
- Hits:
- 779
Bookmarked by FicAddict88
01 Feb 2025
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He remembers everything, the way the flies buzzed in the hot air, fat and lazy from gorging themselves on the decay that festered in the streets, the way the heat made the packed earth shimmer, the way Nate had smiled ever so slightly at the morning’s brief, lips curling back over his teeth, and he knows what will come.
Series
- Part 2 of ballad of a dove
Bookmarked by FicAddict88
01 Feb 2025
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Death Cancels Everything But Truth by Kahtya Sofia (KahtyaSofia)
Fandoms: Generation Kill
18 Jan 2011
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During Bravo Two’s second tour of Iraq, the unthinkable happens. Brad is right there when it does.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,912
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 4
- Kudos:
- 133
- Bookmarks:
- 14
- Hits:
- 3,703
Bookmarked by FicAddict88
22 Jan 2025
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Brad loves little in life, but he loves his job the most, and he is useless in everything else. The threat of losing that...what was a little misery compared to finding himself without purpose?
Bookmarked by FicAddict88
22 Jan 2025
