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  1. Public Bookmark 26

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    Ex was tired. He was tired, and he kind of missed the void. But nooo, some weird god thing had pulled him out, throwing him into some other strange plane of existence for a ‘second chance.’ A second chance that was starting to make him feel more vengeful than years in the void ever had. Seriously, they hadn't gotten more than a couple hours of rest in days. They were cranky, and more than anything they were tired.

    Whatever this attempt at rehabilitating them was, it was obviously going wrong. He was pretty sure that the work here was supposed to be monotonous and annoying, maybe mirroring how it was for other people to deal with his nonsense back in his brother’s server, but he didn’t think it was supposed to leave him in a perpetual state of exhaustion and dread. No, that was the Hermits’ fault.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,598
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    12
    Kudos:
    145
    Bookmarks:
    26
    Hits:
    1,076

    02 Jul 2024

  2. Public Bookmark 15

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    “DOC, WE HAVE BEEN IN THIS SEASON FOR TEN DAYS. WHAT DO YOU MEAN 'MY KILL SATELLITE'S GONE HAYWIRE!?'”

     

    Or: Right at the start of season ten, things go completely off the rails. The Hivemind's not responding to Doc's calls, and they've got a superweapon bolted to their satellite. Figuring out why the Hivemind aren't talking is going to take a crack team of the brightest Hermits they've got on deck...

    ...which is why it's a shame that Iskall and Skizz are the only ones fit for the mission.

    Armed with Tango's old space suit, a pressurized fishbowl, and half a clue, the two wayward astronauts are blasting off into an interplanetary nightmare...

     

    EDIT NOVEMBER 24TH, 2024:

    This fic was completed before the evidence against Iskall came to light. All chapters were finished and in a postable state prior to then. They have been dumped all at once for the sake of completeness. They are unedited beyond that.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    48,734
    Chapters:
    27/27
    Comments:
    135
    Kudos:
    192
    Bookmarks:
    15
    Hits:
    3,524

    02 Jul 2024

  3. This has been deleted, sorry!

    27 Jun 2024

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    (Scattered AU)

    The new server turns out to be a death trap.

    Grian is very aware of this, given it's his death messages filling up their broken chat. When he's finally saved from his glitched spawn, it becomes rapidly clear that none of them will remain the people they started as.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    25,471
    Chapters:
    11/?
    Comments:
    202
    Kudos:
    754
    Bookmarks:
    106
    Hits:
    13,798

    27 Jun 2024

  5. Public Bookmark 5

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    Summary

    Martyn somehow breaks into the Hermitcraft server, and is looking for a certain goat/creeper hybrid that might've pissed him off a little.

    It really doesn't go well

     

    Based on Martyn saying 'So apparently Ren and Doc are canonically married now? That pisses me off' and ‘I’m gonna fight Doc for Ren’ a few days ago 💀

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,369
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    109
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    910

    25 Jun 2024

  6. Public Bookmark 15

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    Summary

    Ever since he first ate someone’s soul, Mumbo has felt… off. Taking his chances, he goes to ask a certain Evil Hermit for advice.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,133
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    78
    Bookmarks:
    15
    Hits:
    333

    06 Jun 2024

  7. Public Bookmark 17

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    Summary

    Zedaph is the assigned reaper for Hermitcraft. It’s in his contract that no other Reapers should touch his turf. So when a mysterious figure armed with a twisted scythe appears in pursuit of his friends, Zed’s got his hands full trying to stop them.

    Doc may be marked for death, but this other reaper’s got murder on the mind. Uncovering what’s gone wrong is going to lead Zed down a path that puts the entire afterlife in question…

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,997
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    52
    Kudos:
    204
    Bookmarks:
    17
    Hits:
    1,309

    04 Jun 2024

  8. Public Bookmark 23

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    Summary

    Xisuma has taken his final bow, in the silence and solitude of his towers.

    But what if he doesn't make that call? What if he listens, instead, to the words left for him, by worried friends?
    What if it draws another jungle-dweller, to sit and share a final sunset?

    When the Hermits gather for another Blue Creeper, will it be enough to soothe old hurts, or will they bear witness to the culmination of a wounded, breaking heart?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,182
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    27
    Kudos:
    243
    Bookmarks:
    23
    Hits:
    3,076

    03 Jun 2024

  9. Public Bookmark 12

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    Summary

    Evil Xisuma had long since lost his name, his reputation, and now even his freedom, all in his brother's shadow. Now he is locked in nothingness, never to be seen again.

    -

    Xisuma had pushed his brother out of sigh and out of mind. Now his brother has gone missing from his prison, and it is all his fault.

    -

    or... brothers learn to forgive each other from a weighty past

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,471
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    81
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    683

    30 May 2024

  10. This has been deleted, sorry!

    30 May 2024

  11. Public Bookmark *

    Summary

    A science fantasy AU about a species of body-snatching aliens attempting to take over the Earth and the ragtag bunch of misfits trying to stop them. Based on the Lifeline series of mobile games.

    Words:
    324,806
    Works:
    8
    Bookmarks:
    208

    29 May 2024

  12. Public Bookmark 54

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    Summary

    So, Tango isn’t dead. That’s a good thing, because if he’d gone through all that trouble to die now, he needn’t have bothered with all the effort. What’s less good is that he’s trapped somewhere beyond a black hole, with no way home and no idea what to do. Oh, and the aliens. The aliens are here too.

    Pearl isn’t dead. Which is weird, because she’d rather thought she would be, and she’s not really sure what to do now that she isn’t. She’s also trapped on the other side of a magical portal with no way to get back—but maybe that isn’t so much of a bad thing. Or, at least, it wouldn’t be, if it weren’t for the fact that this place is riddled with demons.

    Impulse is tired of waiting for a message. It’s time to send one of his own.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    177,573
    Chapters:
    31/31
    Comments:
    1,798
    Kudos:
    738
    Bookmarks:
    54
    Hits:
    15,828

    29 May 2024

  13. Public Bookmark 9

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    Summary

    Becoming an alien would have been confusing enough by itself. Once you include the accidental murder of one of his friends, the hell dimension he's somehow found himself thrust into, his new allies and their uncanny ability to just accept the mixed-up version of reality they live in, and the former friend trying to kill him at every turn? Yeah, Ren's way past the point of confusion. He needs answers, but his search for them only brings him more questions and darker conclusions, and at the end of it he's left to wonder: what is the point of all this?

    And is there any way to stop it?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,601
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    49
    Kudos:
    185
    Bookmarks:
    9
    Hits:
    1,242

    28 May 2024

  14. Public Bookmark 85

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    Tango is an astronaut who has crash-landed on a distant moon far from home. His ship is destroyed, his crew is gone, and he has no way out of here alive. All he has is gritty determination, a healthy amount of sarcasm, and a radio that can only reach one person who isn’t any more prepared to deal with this crisis than he is.

    Impulse is an engineer who’s been getting into radio tech lately on the urging of his best friend and personal annoyance, Skizz. He can’t seem to get his radio to work, however—at least, not until it starts picking up a distress signal from the other side of the galaxy. Honestly, he probably shouldn’t be getting involved in this, considering he has no idea what he’s doing, but it sounds like this guy really needs help. And who is Impulse to turn down someone in need of help?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    44,099
    Chapters:
    11/11
    Comments:
    336
    Kudos:
    671
    Bookmarks:
    85
    Hits:
    11,652

    25 May 2024

  15. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    The world is divided in two halves--the human half, and the monster half. The only thing keeping the two sides from clashing is a perilous mountain range, known to the humans as the Edge of the World. A small town called the Roost overlooks the wilds from the peaks; it's known for being cold, dangerous, and full of people who don't belong anywhere else.

    Doc is one of those people. He failed, once, and now he has placed himself into exile at the furthest reaches of the human world. The Roost is in need of a new doctor--their last was presumed eaten by werewolves. However, Doc's respite from society quickly turns sour as the werewolves strike again... and a horrible illness reappears out of his past, along with someone who was once a friend.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    74,568
    Chapters:
    24/24
    Comments:
    537
    Kudos:
    758
    Bookmarks:
    108
    Hits:
    16,359

    25 May 2024

  16. This has been deleted, sorry!

    24 May 2024

  17. Public Bookmark 8

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    Summary

    “Well, probably not everyone, I could imagine Gem and Pearl haven't had the chance. But most hermits,” the look Etho gave him was beyond suspicious, “are you pulling a Grian? He's been at it in season six. Shattered X’s visor, it was a huge argument.”

    “I'm not going to break his helmet! I'm just trying to get him to take it off.”

    ~
    Joel made it his challenge to catch Xisuma without his helmet

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,270
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    163
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    931

    29 Apr 2024

  18. Public Bookmark 49

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    Summary

    “Your first task. What is it?” Scott asks.

    “The Red King of Dogwarts.” Martyn answers with a large smile, licking his fingers.

    “Damn, for real?” Scott frowns, his spoon stopping half way up “That’s a big one!”

    “I know! Something weird happened while I was choosing it-” he whispers, still fearing that the spell will break “Like, I was hearing something and the scroll changed out of nowhere, right in front of my eyes!”

    “And that’s not normal? You can never know with you Watchers.”

    “No. BigB didn’t even recognize it. I dunno, it’s a mystery.” Martyn mumbles, scraping his claw on his fang “But yeah, I’m going for the Red King.”

    “Dogwarts, huh...” Scott hums, getting up from the table and heading towards his bookshelves “That’s on Hermitopia.” it doesn’t take long for him to find what he’s looking for, a rolled map “The most mysterious land of them all. You're in for a treat, Martyn.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    173,883
    Chapters:
    32/?
    Comments:
    203
    Kudos:
    354
    Bookmarks:
    49
    Hits:
    10,061

    25 Apr 2024

  19. Public Bookmark 30

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    Summary

    It had been a while since Martyn visited the Hermits, and it seemed like a good idea to visit them again for fun.

    Everything was fine when he joined their world, and everything was fine when he saw his surroundings, although the place seemed a lot quieter than usual.

    As he finally stumbles across one of his oldest friends, it wasn’t until Martyn made eye contact with them when he figured out something was terribly wrong.
    -----
    Updates around every 2 weeks - a month but may be inconsistent

    !!! ON HIATUS, undergoing reconstruction. When it's done being rewritten I'll post the next chapter !!!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,431
    Chapters:
    13/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    68
    Kudos:
    256
    Bookmarks:
    30
    Hits:
    4,955

    31 Mar 2024

  20. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Tango has never really kept his robotic nature a secret from anyone. He just kind of assumed Impulse and Zedaph would figure it out. Maybe he overestimated them.

    Or, five times Impulse and Zedaph are oblivious to the signs that their friend is a robot, and one time the evidence is impossible to miss.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,223
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    115
    Kudos:
    1,219
    Bookmarks:
    143
    Hits:
    6,484

    16 Mar 2024

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