1 - 20 of 131 Bookmarks by loserturtles
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Dean has been procrastinating on his suicide for a long time.
It's been years now, he thinks. Like yet another apocalypse that's been happening silently in the background of all the others the Winchester brothers keep surviving. But this one, this special apocalypse is his own, personal, intimate one.
Mary died a year ago, already. At forty-one, Dean's body has been broken so many times he can't hunt anymore. His relationship with Sam is slowly dying out and Cas only visits once every few weeks.
He's alone.
So he tries to blow his head off. He misses, of course, like the failure he is.
But Cas comes back into his life when he's the most needed. He tends to his wounds and tries to help Dean exhume what's been buried for decades: himself.
What if Dean actually likes talking about his feelings? What if he doesn't want to lie anymore? What if he's not straight? What if he's not who he thought he was?
What if there's still hope?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 62,498
- Chapters:
- 30/30
- Comments:
- 387
- Kudos:
- 1,002
- Bookmarks:
- 233
- Hits:
- 19,683
Bookmarked by loserturtles
01 Dec 2025
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Dean is perusing the cereal aisle for his favorite breakfast box, and he runs into Mary and John Winchester.
But the thing is, Dean hasn't seen them since he took Sammy and the Impala and left town. So to say he's on edge is a little bit of an understatement.
Bookmarked by loserturtles
01 Dec 2025
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“But the sneaking around and the fact my brother has the emotional maturity of a fruit loop has got me thinking that Dean’s doing his usual pretending he has no feelings thing. And Cas…who knows.”
“Men,” Donna grumbles. “Guess it’s worse when there are two of ’em.”
“Hey, I take offence to that,” Sam chuckles. “I’m a man.”
“That why you’re not just talking to Dean about this?”
“Fair point.”
“So you really wanna put the screws to him?” Donna asks, mischief in her eyes. “Isn’t that a bit mean?”
“Listen, Dean’s my brother and I love him. But he’s also my big brother and I have a duty to exploit every opportunity I have to fuck with him.”
“Well, I can’t argue with that,” Donna shrugs. “You really think Dean’ll fall for it? Me putting the moves on him?”
“Well, it’ll make him squirm, that’s for sure.” Sam glances from the road to Donna. “You got a better idea?”
“Oh, you betcha.”
Series
- Part 5 of Sing a Song of Sex Puns
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,081
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 142
- Kudos:
- 2,304
- Bookmarks:
- 156
- Hits:
- 19,657
Bookmarked by loserturtles
01 Dec 2025
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Matt Pearson's life as told through the stories behind each one of his scars. And, man, does that clumsy boy have a lot...
(Based on S1E9 when Serena notices the scar on Matt's arm. I think we all thought it was hot asf)
Bookmarked by loserturtles
01 Oct 2025
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if you were church, I'd get on my knees by dealwiththedevil
Fandoms: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
25 Dec 2021
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Ronan arched an eyebrow, a hand going to trace the cross at his throat, "Careful there. I'm a devout man, now. What would God think?”
"You know I'm not religious, Father." Adam said, and he couldn't disguise the slightly flirty tone in his voice.
Something flashed in Ronan's eyes, and Adam feared for a moment that he may have overstepped. That their past meant nothing. That they were practically strangers now. That Ronan couldn't be swayed from his overwhelming holiness.
But then Ronan put a large hand on the small of his back, and said, "You should really come to confessional after dark, Mr Parrish. All the nuns have gone home by then, and we'll have a nice, quiet place to talk over your sins.”
With those words and a surreptitious wink, Ronan strode out of the church.
[AKA years after they depart, Adam comes back to find out that Ronan is a priest, and confesses his sins in the confessional booth. Sexy times ensue]
Series
- Part 3 of TRC one shots
Bookmarked by loserturtles
15 Sep 2025
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It's 1990. Two years ago, Bobby Singer saved Jody's life by helping to kill her husband and son when they turned into zombies. Now, Jody's responding to a panicked call from a kid at Bobby's house. She finds a lot more than she bargained for.
or, Jody Mills adopts the Winchesters as kids.
Bookmarked by loserturtles
12 Sep 2025
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Build Me A Place (we'll call it home) by SpiritsFlame
Fandoms: DCU (Comics), Justice League - All Media Types, Batman - All Media Types, Superman - All Media Types
08 Oct 2019
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Summary
Kryptonians are not human. It’s easy to forget, even for Clark. That being an alien means more than his powers. There are traits rooted into the DNA, coming out in the subconscious, until not even Clark notices. Kryptonians, among other things, build Bowers for their mates, beautiful homes to settle into. It’s more than a tradition, it’s a way of life.
When Clark begins to redecorate, he doesn't know why it matters so much to him. And why it matters even more when Bruce doesn’t even care.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,905
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 12
- Comments:
- 331
- Kudos:
- 11,808
- Bookmarks:
- 2,435
- Hits:
- 69,964
Bookmarked by loserturtles
25 Aug 2025
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Community Theatre AU where Dean gets roped into taking Sam to audition for a modern interpretation of Into the Woods, and ends up being cast as Little Red Riding Hood opposite Castiel as the Wolf.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 56,674
- Chapters:
- 27/?
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 1,138
- Kudos:
- 755
- Bookmarks:
- 151
- Hits:
- 12,759
Bookmarked by loserturtles
18 Aug 2025
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When one of Cas’ old I.D.’s gets rejected, Sam and Dean tell him afterwards it’s because his picture is outdated—but this doesn’t make any sense, Castiel explains; Angel vessels don’t age.
Dean has to break it to Cas that he doesn’t look like he’s in his 20’s anymore.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,783
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 132
- Kudos:
- 1,557
- Bookmarks:
- 271
- Hits:
- 8,010
Bookmarked by loserturtles
18 Aug 2025
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Summary
Or, a year in the life of Dean Winchester
Dean’s bi: sexual and polar. He’s got a string of hospitalizations under his belt. He’s a felon. He’s got a secret. And he just might have a crush on the wry, socially awkward, and devastatingly handsome artist who lives in the apartment below his. But Dean doesn’t have friends, and he certainly doesn’t have relationships. He has what his therapist Pam calls “impulsive, reckless sexual interactions.” His attempts at meaningful connection have resulted in ruined friendships, broken hearts, restraining orders, and lifechanging ramifications. Dean’s too focused on holding down a job and relearning how to live by himself after years of being babied by his little brother to worry about romance, right? Right.
Series
- Part 1 of silver linings
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 257,988
- Chapters:
- 50/50
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 1,627
- Kudos:
- 1,843
- Bookmarks:
- 556
- Hits:
- 68,554
Bookmarked by loserturtles
18 Aug 2025
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Castiel wakes up from the empty once again, Delirious, hurt and heaving.
Dean is going into a downward spiral quickly, struggling with suicidal ideation and self harm.
“Dean is begging. He’s shaking so hard it’s like a machine gun is going off in his body, rattling the man to his core. Castiel can’t make it out. He can’t figure out what he is praying to. Who is he praying to?
He can’t make it out, because there’s darkness clouding his mind all over again. It’s desperate, pulling and ripping its way through until it makes that specific vision go away. But Dean is praying.”
“I love— fuck. I love you, Cas. Castiel. I love you, fuck, please. Jesus, I can’t- Fuck. Please, I can’t.
He’s swung himself up so quickly into the real world that he can’t catch himself. It’s still dark, but he’s awake. Really awake. He’s no longer trapped in the nightmare. He can see his hands, oh, Jesus.”
Little snippet !
UPDATE SOON ❤️
Bookmarked by loserturtles
12 Aug 2025
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Summary
Locked away in a mental hospital with agitating fear and turmoil all around him, Dean finds it difficult to stay sane. Though when he meets the new patient Castiel, a young schizophrenic who dreams to do nothing more than to fly, Dean falls in love and the two begin a compassionate romance. However, when tragedy strikes, Dean is pushed to go to great lengths in order to keep Castiel safe.
Paper Flowers is a story of gentle benevolence surrounded by darkness and hostility. At its core, this story shows the dangerous depths of human nature and how far a person will go in order to protect the ones they love.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 42,345
- Chapters:
- 12/12
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 40
- Kudos:
- 131
- Bookmarks:
- 69
- Hits:
- 4,114
Bookmarked by loserturtles
12 Aug 2025
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Summary
What does John see when he looks at Cas?
Cas doesn’t look like a monster.
But neither does Dean.
John stands, slow. He holds out a hand. Calloused like Dean’s hands are calloused. Scarred the same way that Dean’s hands are scarred. There’s the smell of him in the air too. Earthy and dark, slightly sour around the edges. The room feels suddenly choked with it. Claustrophobic.
Cas probably smells like the fabric softener they buy in bulk at Costco, but so does Dean so he can’t tell.
John says, toneless, “I hear you’ve been driving my car.”
. . .
The closer you are to what you want—
Dean's twenty-nine year old mother, his undefined relationship with Cas and their small family. Some kind of impossible reconciliation with John Winchester. Michael, out of his head, without destroying the world. His father's approval. To see the Grand Canyon.
—The more vulnerable you are.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 70,910
- Chapters:
- 12/12
- Comments:
- 528
- Kudos:
- 742
- Bookmarks:
- 244
- Hits:
- 15,477
Bookmarked by loserturtles
12 Aug 2025
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Summary
Post "Nightmares and Names".
Left behind from what Dean and John thought was a dangerous hunt, Sam finds himself caught by a far more dangerous foe than any beast: people. Specifically, Child Protective Services.
Or: Why promises are so important to the brothers, and why Dean doesn't trust people.
Dean is 13, Sam is 9.
Series
- Part 5 of Raising a Big Brother
Bookmarked by loserturtles
10 Aug 2025
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Summary
Dean hasn’t eaten in eight days by the time he passes out in the middle of his Literature class.
Bookmarked by loserturtles
10 Aug 2025
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Summary
All Miss Bennett wanted was to meet Sam Winchester's father once.
So, she couldn't understand why Dean was always there in his place.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,893
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 41
- Kudos:
- 3,031
- Bookmarks:
- 502
- Hits:
- 14,856
Bookmarked by loserturtles
10 Aug 2025
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Summary
n. A view or opinion that is incorrect because it is based on faulty thinking or understanding.
AU of 14x13. Instead of rushing to get John back to his own time, they decide to let him stay a little longer. Time won't completely collapse with one night with their dad, so what harm can him staying do?
For Sam, a lot of harm. John believes something about his sons and he's determined to set all the blame at his youngest's feet, revealing painful secrets that Sam would've preferred to stay hidden, things he feared anyone finding out, things John feels are wrong.
Too bad for John that Mary and Dean don't feel the same way and are more than ready to back Sam.
NOT WINCEST in the SLIGHTEST, but John sure thinks so.
Two-shot.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 14,954
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 145
- Kudos:
- 2,964
- Bookmarks:
- 716
- Hits:
- 34,413
Bookmarked by loserturtles
10 Aug 2025
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Summary
It took Sam a while to notice it. Longer than he’d like to admit. But to be fair to himself, he had been watching for impulses of a more murder-the-world kind, not whatever was going on now.
It all really boils down to this: Dean styles his hair. Which Dean has always done, and Sam has always known. But the hair gel is no longer tucked away in the bottom of his duffel bag; it stays out in the open of the shared bathroom of the Bunker, and Dean doesn’t hide what he’s doing if Sam walks in.
“Heya Sammy,” Dean greets happily, running a hand through his hair.
“Hi,” he says back, nervously watching Dean’s actions.
He’s looking in the mirror, and it’s not until he stopped that Sam realizes Dean’s always flinched at his reflection.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,879
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 138
- Kudos:
- 3,982
- Bookmarks:
- 679
- Hits:
- 22,256
Bookmarked by loserturtles
10 Aug 2025
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Summary
Cas dies. The world disappears. Dean stops eating.
Cas dies. The world comes back. Jack leaves. Dean stops eating.
Cas dies, and Dean stops eating, and he keeps on dreaming.
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(“You’ll be gone by the time I come back,” Cas says sadly.
Dean smiled at him, content and serene, and slowly signed, rusty from lack of use, “I can’t stop.”)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,953
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 54
- Kudos:
- 1,069
- Bookmarks:
- 228
- Hits:
- 10,102
Bookmarked by loserturtles
09 Aug 2025
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Summary
When Dean takes the brunt of a spell intended to evict Castiel from his vessel, his mind fractures and it falls to Cas and Sam to put him back together—not knowing how many pieces of Dean there are, or which part will come out next. Will it be the innocent child who remembers that angels are watching over him? The Hell-tortured adult who believes he’s not worthy of rescue? The angry hunter who has been betrayed one too many times? Or the lover who no longer has a reason to hold back?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 36,710
- Chapters:
- 18/18
- Collections:
- 5
- Comments:
- 678
- Kudos:
- 4,082
- Bookmarks:
- 1,025
- Hits:
- 51,706
Bookmarked by loserturtles
07 Aug 2025