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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Ilya Rozanov's life takes an unexpected turn when a deadly plane crash in 2021 takes his life, right after a fight with his long-time partner, Shane Hollander. Though instead of the afterlife, Ilya is sent back to December 2008, just before his NHL career began, on the very day that he first met Shane. He finds himself in a familiar world, with knowledge of both the future and knowledge of the man he loves and the friends he holds dear.

    As Ilya navigates this new reality, he rebuilds his relationship with Shane, who is still finding his path in both hockey and his identity as a gay man. With their rivalry blossoming into a different experience than the one Ilya experienced the first time around, the two face challenges around acceptance, family pressures, and the struggles of being openly gay and lovers in the sports world. Throughout their journey, Ilya contemplates his first life, cherishes the present, and strives to alter the course of their futures (and the futures of their friends) for the better.

    Or, Ilya Rozanov discovers first hand what the butterfly effect is, and how it can drastically alter the future.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    67,594
    Chapters:
    11/11
    Comments:
    1,178
    Kudos:
    8,586
    Bookmarks:
    3,386
    Hits:
    169,416

    22 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Read

  2. Public Bookmark 30

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    Summary

    Shane's out of a few household items. He's been reluctant to completely acquiesce to Ilya's way of life, and he's held onto his beloved Costco runs.

    Ilya's never been to one. Shenanigans ensue.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,731
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    38
    Kudos:
    291
    Bookmarks:
    30
    Hits:
    2,390

    21 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    WIP up to ch 2

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane has married Ilya, a known chaos monster, with a penchant for fast cars and designer clothes. Shane has spent his life making sure he was financially responsible. Now it's time to merge these two different approaches to money management; It does not go the way Shane thinks it will.

    They had been married for 32 days.

    And now was the big conversation: estate planning, their assets, and what combining them would look like.

    Shane had found a financial planner. Had set the appointment.

    He was, after all, Shane Hollander; he had approached his financial future with all of the key characteristics of a Hollander. His mom had guided his career, negotiating sizable contracts for him, and his father worked for the Treasury. It was in his blood.

    Ilya, meanwhile, had approached today's meeting with the same organizational energy he brought to most things in his life, except hockey: confident, yet chaotic, and generally not stressed out about whether things would work out in his favor.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,050
    Chapters:
    10/10
    Comments:
    290
    Kudos:
    2,559
    Bookmarks:
    448
    Hits:
    32,800

    21 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Read

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Thank you for being parents to me today. Was nice to not feel scared and alone. Love being part of Hollander family. ❤️

    “My god, even I never get a heart emoji from you,” Shane laughed, handing the phone back to Ilya, who quickly sent the message. “It must be love.”

    “It is,” Ilya said as his phone pinged again, a message from Yuna lighting up the screen.

    And we love you, Ilya. We're here for you and Shane, always. Thank you for letting us take care of you. ❤️

    *****

    Life for Ilya Rozanov hasn’t always been easy.

    It's a good thing that Shane, Yuna and David have decided he’s theirs now.

    A series of firsts with Ilya's chosen family.
     

    Or: the found family fic where Ilya finally gets the love he deserves.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    26,302
    Chapters:
    8/8
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    194
    Kudos:
    2,010
    Bookmarks:
    645
    Hits:
    42,098

    21 Jun 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    When Shane takes a hard hit on the ice, he wakes up three days later to find his reality has been shattered. But the truth is, it wasn’t reality at all. Just an elaborate set of false memories conjured by a brain injury. 'False memory syndrome' they call it. Shane calls it a nightmare he couldn't have imagined.

    Or

    Shane doesn’t have amnesia. Instead, he wakes up wanting his boyfriend only to realize his brain concocted a bunch of fake memories of a nine year situationship and Shane has no idea how to live in his actual reality that Ilya hasn’t been a part of. Luckily, Ilya is…curious.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    63,617
    Chapters:
    11/11
    Comments:
    1,420
    Kudos:
    10,168
    Bookmarks:
    3,363
    Hits:
    210,538

    20 Jun 2026

  6. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Cliff watches him squeeze the phone between his cheek and shoulder, lifting the jersey over his head as he continues to talk, a bit distracted now by the multitasking.

    “And was good practice, you know, for when I am your husband."

    Immediately, the locker room goes dead silent. And so does Rozanov, in fact.

    In which Ilya accidentally calls himself Shane's future husband in the middle of the Bears locker room. Worse still, they're not even dating yet.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,942
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    178
    Kudos:
    2,572
    Bookmarks:
    535
    Hits:
    15,957

    20 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Read Ilya being a loverboy

  7. Public Bookmark *

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    The plane carrying the Voyageurs home from Houston crashes just after take-off.

    Shane is on board.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    143,937
    Chapters:
    17/17
    Comments:
    2,155
    Kudos:
    8,229
    Bookmarks:
    2,776
    Hits:
    184,059

    19 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Tbr

  8. Public Bookmark *

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    "Shane," Bood says firmly. And it sounds so wrong, because Bood never calls him Shane. Shane is always Hollzy. And Bood's voice is supposed to be loud and steady, not shaky. And Shane finally, finally becomes aware enough of his surroundings to feel the trembling of Bood's hands against his waist. "Shane, please. They're working on him. We need to give them space so they can—so they can make sure he's okay."

    "He's my husband," Shane chokes out, not quite managing to choke down the sob that's been building up long enough to boil over. Bood makes a similarly choked noise at that. "You need to let me go. He's my husband."

    OR

    Ilya gets injured on the ice during Shane's first season with the Centaurs. Shane loses his mind, a bit.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,016
    Chapters:
    2/3
    Comments:
    89
    Kudos:
    418
    Bookmarks:
    168
    Hits:
    6,785

    18 Jun 2026

  9. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    "I think we should start gaslighting everyone.” Shane looks at Ilya to see his reaction.

    “I don’t understand.”

    “No statements, no plans, of course we’re still doing the charity, but let’s just act like we already came out to everyone.”

    Ilya smirks. “Gaslight them?” Shane nods.

     

    or Shane comes up with the idea of gaslighting everyone into thinking they already came out. Ilya and Shane proceed to go out to lunch, and go on first dates slowly gaslighting their friends and the world.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,851
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    388
    Kudos:
    8,869
    Bookmarks:
    1,345
    Hits:
    74,657

    18 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Read

  10. Public Bookmark *

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    “You never forget?”

    “No,” Shane breathes out. “No, I never forget.”

    Except Ilya does.

    He forgets his wedding ring.

    And Shane notices.

    Or: Shane gets stuck inside his own head when Ilya forgets his wedding ring.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,296
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    328
    Kudos:
    13,827
    Bookmarks:
    2,857
    Hits:
    134,832

    18 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Read

  11. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    In the early hours of Saturday, the Hockey world was ablaze with the news that Ilya Rozanov was dead. Killed in a tragic car accident leaving behind a slew of devastated fans and a grieving husband still reeling in shock.

    The news also came as an incredible shock to Ilya when he awoke that same day, hungover and bleary, but very much alive. 

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    26,385
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    2,355
    Kudos:
    40,595
    Bookmarks:
    9,591
    Hits:
    458,938

    18 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Read

  12. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Shane Hollander was the number one draft pick and is now captain of the Boston Raiders. Ilya Rozanov quit hockey after his mother died and now owns a bookshop in Boston. When Shane moves into a new apartment down the street from One Good Memory, he finds more than just a convenient place to grab a new book.

    Or...Shane is lonely and closeted and reads a lot; Ilya is charmed and quotes books at him.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    53,700
    Chapters:
    7/?
    Comments:
    1,377
    Kudos:
    1,934
    Bookmarks:
    1,040
    Hits:
    51,182

    18 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    WIP

  13. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “Good, well then that brings me to the real topic of conversation.” Another sigh from Coach Wiebe, “As I’m sure you’ve already guessed, those highlighted names have been offered rookie contracts and they’ve each expressed interest in living with a vet for their first year.”

    Ilya felt his heart fall into his stomach, afraid of the next words to come out of his Coach’s mouth.

    “We asked the rookies who they’d like to live with and, well, LaPointe wanted to board with you, Chouinard. And Young with you, Bood,” Wiebe then turned to Ilya who had frozen on the spot, “And Roz, Haas wants to live with you.”

    Bood and Chouinard chuckled as they watched Ilya’s eyes widen in horror.

     

    OR

     

    Luca Haas was drafted 2nd overall by the Ottawa Centaurs in 2018. Two years later, he anxiously moved halfway across the world to play his rookie season with the team. He requested to live with Ilya Rozanov and they slowly became family.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    141,854
    Chapters:
    30/?
    Comments:
    1,986
    Kudos:
    7,679
    Bookmarks:
    2,114
    Hits:
    270,273

    17 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Wip

  14. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Everyone in the NHL wants Shane Hollander. Maybe that should make Ilya feel proud, accomplished, even. Because he's the only one who has ever really had him. The only one who will.
    But really, it only seems to piss him off. Make him possessive.
    Shane kind of likes that.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    48,992
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    613
    Kudos:
    6,747
    Bookmarks:
    1,975
    Hits:
    141,621

    17 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Read

  15. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    A stray kitten breaks into the Hollander house on Christmas Eve and steals a butter tart. Shane texts Ilya about it. This is a love story, somehow.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,904
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    263
    Kudos:
    2,031
    Bookmarks:
    203
    Hits:
    11,701

    17 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Read

  16. Public Bookmark 47

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    Summary

    I will always come back to you.

    Ilya made that promise to Shane as their plane fell from the sky. He meant it with every fiber of his being.

    For four days, Ilya fights through a frozen wilderness, driven by one purpose: save Shane. Save his teammates. Get help. Come back.
    He fires the flare. The helicopters come. He keeps his promise.

    He came back.

    An alternate ending to "I Will Always Come Back."

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    37,339
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    58
    Kudos:
    215
    Bookmarks:
    47
    Hits:
    5,437

    17 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Read

  17. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    The Ottawa Centaurs' flight goes down somewhere over the Canadian wilderness, and Shane wakes up with metal in his leg and Ilya's name on his lips.

    Four days. That's how long they're stranded—fighting injuries, infection, freezing temperatures, and the creeping despair of a rescue that may never come.

    When Ilya disappears into the wilderness to find help, Shane is left behind with nothing but fever dreams and the desperate hope that his husband will keep his promise to come back.

    "I will always come back to you. No matter what."

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    22,202
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    92
    Kudos:
    1,087
    Bookmarks:
    287
    Hits:
    20,458

    17 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Read

  18. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    On a Monday morning in October, Shane Hollander drops a mug of coffee and doesn't get back up.

    Ilya is upstairs with the twins. He hears the sound — not the mug breaking, but the body. The thud of the person who holds it all upright. He puts the children down. He goes to the kitchen. Shane is on the floor, looking at Ilya, trying to say everything, but nothing comes out.

    Stroke. Left hemisphere. Thirty-eight years old.

    Shane spends six weeks in a hospital bed learning how to say his children's names. Ilya spends six weeks splitting himself into three people — the husband in the chair, the father in the nursery, the hockey player on the ice

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    101,504
    Chapters:
    10/10
    Comments:
    68
    Kudos:
    456
    Bookmarks:
    156
    Hits:
    16,801

    17 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Tags:
    Bookmarker's Notes

    Read - shane stroke

  19. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    @shanehollander24_hockey✅
    It's true.

    ➤ @shaneybaby
    SIR WHAT IS TRUE????

    ➤@shanehollander24_hockey✅
    I'm engaged.
    @shaneybaby
    TO WHOM??
    ➤@shanehollander24_hockey✅
    t's for you all to figure out.

    OR

    @svetlana_v_✅

    ilya domestic ERA

    ➤ @ilyaaaaax81✅

    🤫

    @mlh_puckrabbit

    SIR CARE TO ELABORATE?

    @ilyaaaaax81✅

    no.

    @iloverozzyyy

    WHAT?

    @ilyaaaaax81✅

    no.

     

    exactly what the title says, followed by pure calculated chaos

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    33,237
    Chapters:
    15/?
    Comments:
    1,129
    Kudos:
    4,538
    Bookmarks:
    971
    Hits:
    82,704

    16 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    WIP PICTURES read up to chapter 15

  20. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “Can’t hang out tonight, Hayd. I have plans.”

    “Bullshit,” Hayden responds. “You never have plans.”

    Objectively, this used to be true. Nowadays Shane has many, many plans, between his nightly plans to look at Ilya’s penis through Skype and his various long-term plans laid out helpfully in his notebook, Canva (For Ilya’s sake. He is a visual learner), and more recently, Excel. Shane loves that excel sheet. He’s colour coded it.

     

    In 2017, Shane Hollander spirals and proposes to his boyfriend of 4 days (or 7 years, or 9 years, or not his boyfriend at all, depending on how you look at it), which leads to a lot of plans, weird theories in the Montreal Voyageur locker room, some Twitter drama, and Ilya Rozanov entering his WAG era.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    118,812
    Chapters:
    8/8
    Comments:
    5,029
    Kudos:
    28,017
    Bookmarks:
    9,996
    Hits:
    810,296

    15 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Read has pictures

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