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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Alastor doesn't care for his second gender--second genders in general. He doesn't like not feeling in control of his body, his mind.

    Needing things.

    He has had one rut, and that was all he was ever going to have as far as he was concerned.

    Lucifer on the other hand is extremely confident in his second gender, and knowing creation inside and out, sees everyone's instincts as necessary....everything is just...biology. How they were created. So, why is Alastor so against it all?

    TAGS WILL BE UPDATED AS WE GO.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    229,040
    Chapters:
    30/30
    Comments:
    963
    Kudos:
    1,875
    Bookmarks:
    396
    Hits:
    58,456

    16 Feb 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Alastor makes it a grand total of thirteen days before collapsing in the lobby. It’s an abjectly humiliating experience for the split-second he’s cognizant of what’s happening before everything goes utterly black.

    In which Alastor returns to the hotel and an olive branch is offered over coffee. It’s all very unexceptional.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,744
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    114
    Kudos:
    1,276
    Bookmarks:
    284
    Hits:
    9,219

    30 Jan 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    The thing about Alastor was, despite his ‘international man of mystery’ vibe, he wasn’t above being the one manipulated if a person knew how and Lucifer was one in the know. This wasn’t amateur hour here, he was Lucifer, thank you, and his manipulation techniques were top notch.

    The best way to get anyone to do something for you was making them believe it was their idea in the first place

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,251
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    116
    Kudos:
    2,515
    Bookmarks:
    374
    Hits:
    14,323

    25 Jan 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    "You passed your interview!"

    "How quaint." Alastor clicked his tongue. "I believe there were other steps you missed."

    The devil waved a hand. "What questions would I bother with? Availability? Past experience? Should I give you a written test for why you want this position?"

    Alastor leveled him a flat stare.

    or

    Alastor made a reckless decision to summon a demon from his mother’s old book of suspicious rituals as a means to get power and vengeance. He didn't know he would summon the King of Hell himself. After dying, falling to Hell, and catching Lucifer's eye, Alastor finds himself spending his afterlife essentially being a secretary to the King of Hell and occasionally nannying a naive Princess of Hell. Alastor is trying to fulfill his contract, but for some unholy reason, her father keeps trying to figure Alastor out

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    391,000
    Chapters:
    60/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    2,641
    Kudos:
    3,561
    Bookmarks:
    785
    Hits:
    136,676

    05 Jan 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Lucifer has always kept his distance from sinners. It's what keeps him (relatively) sane — if he gets too close, he is haunted by visions of the tragic mortal lives that landed them in Hell.

    But in his new life at the Hotel, it is more difficult than ever to stay away — and when it comes to light that his daughter's insufferable facilities manager is gravely wounded, it falls to Lucifer to deliver his soul from Death.

    In so doing, he falls headfirst into the sins, past lives, and heartbreaks of the one human whose contradictions he is powerless to resist.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    58,531
    Chapters:
    15/15
    Comments:
    767
    Kudos:
    3,072
    Bookmarks:
    759
    Hits:
    54,226

    01 Jan 2026

  6. Public Bookmark *

    Summary

    It starts with a single gift. A gift that turns a relationship based on hate fucking to something else that neither are willing to name.

    Join Lucifer as he navigates through his terrible, horrible, no good, very bad relationship with Alastor and learns maybe it isn’t as bad as all that.

    Words:
    672,877
    Works:
    62
    Bookmarks:
    1,439

    19 Dec 2025

  7. Public Bookmark 96

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    Summary

    Where is he?!

    Alastor blinks rapidly, forcing himself back to more coherent awareness than whatever misplaced drivel had momentarily overtaken him. It takes a few beats for him to shake the layers of uncharacteristic grogginess away to confirm that he can definitely see the glow of said city in the windows above him.

    The massive, high-arched panes that stretch far beyond human architecture are casting shadows upon a bed that most certainly isn’t his own.

    Panic trickling down his spine, Alastor blinks again, bringing his reflection into focus.

    Or, rather, theirs.

     Aka - the long (sorry) awaited morning after fic for Wicked game. Planning to have this update out before s2 and to continue writing around what happens in the upcoming season! <3

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    31,404
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    100
    Kudos:
    832
    Bookmarks:
    96
    Hits:
    11,967

    10 Dec 2025

  8. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “We argued. Extensively. In front of his daughter. There were so many buttons to push. He’s so easily ruffled, it’s simply delightful!” He sets his monocle back in its rightful place, choosing instead to fidget with his microphone. “Of course, I do understand that, even with my lack of experience, this is not, exactly, ideal… So, I’ve come to you, my dear friend, in hopes of hearing your thoughts and getting your expert advice in this matter so I may make him my own.”

    It was quiet in the shop for several long moments, Alastor’s static feedback getting gradually louder as he became more agitated from her lack of response.

    He lifts his eyes when he feels Rosie’s hands cover his own on top of his microphone, ceasing their inane movements that were so unlike him. She looked genuinely taken aback by his confession, but not horrified, which was a good sign.

    “Alastor, I’ve gotta admit, you’re really giving me a run for my money,” she tells him softly.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,010
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    537
    Kudos:
    4,860
    Bookmarks:
    740
    Hits:
    71,654

    09 Dec 2025

  9. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    He hadn’t even managed to put on shoes when Charlie’s loud, desolated groan at the other end of the hotel had made him rush out of his room, and his slippers and the hems of his pyjama bottoms were slowly getting soaked through. Why the fuck had he even bothered to change? He loved Charlie (see constants no. 1-4), but even he had to admit his current discomfort was solely the result of the list of healthy bedtime rituals she’d organised for him when, allegedly, the bags under his eyes had started developing a gravitational pull.

    In which Lucifer has insomnia, the hotel is moderately alive, and Alastor is in over his head.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    43,929
    Chapters:
    8/8
    Comments:
    837
    Kudos:
    4,166
    Bookmarks:
    1,330
    Hits:
    68,636

    02 Dec 2025

  10. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Draco Malfoy thought he had reasonable expectations for his mandatory Eighth Year at Hogwarts, where he would be confined to the grounds as part of his probation. Isolation, hatred, and passing his NEWTs were really all he had in mind.

    What he wasn't anticipating:
    1) Having a small firstie latch onto him like a bloody koala
    2) Said firstie adopting an erkling as if they didn’t feed on children.

    To protect his little nuisance, he’ll have to seek help from uncomfortable places, including the Swottiest Witch of Her Age. Joy of all joys.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    50,035
    Chapters:
    12/12
    Collections:
    37
    Comments:
    1,675
    Kudos:
    12,365
    Bookmarks:
    4,613
    Hits:
    307,063

    13 Oct 2025

  11. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Aziraphale is trapped in a time loop, reliving the days since Gabriel arrived.

    What he has to fix? It's a mystery

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,475
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Collections:
    3
    Comments:
    644
    Kudos:
    3,612
    Bookmarks:
    806
    Hits:
    40,620

    07 Sep 2025

  12. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “It’s just,” he continued, “I’ve noticed that humans—some humans, anyway—they use that word, angel, as a…well, as a sort of…endearment.”

    “Do they?” said Crowley, who had invented using the word as an endearment in the 13th century AD.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,520
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    4
    Comments:
    478
    Kudos:
    9,852
    Bookmarks:
    2,000
    Hits:
    68,187

    02 Sep 2025

  13. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    "And what happens if we don't carry out the dare? What's the penalty?" If he was going to contract with a demon, he had to be sure of terms. After all, Crowley could ask for… anything...

    Crowley smiled, all sharp eye teeth. "Knowing the other one won."

    ***

    Crowley and Aziraphale play truth or dare through the centuries.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,411
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    98
    Kudos:
    496
    Bookmarks:
    112
    Hits:
    3,722

    15 Mar 2025

  14. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Crowley hosts a late night comedy talk show. Aziraphale hosts a feel good morning talk show.

    When Crowley is asked to present Aziraphale with a lifetime achievement award, everything goes a bit skew-whiff.

    -----

    Normally when I don’t get something that everyone else seems to be mad on my first point of call is the wonderful world of the internet, but we’ve had a falling out you see, the internet and I. Despite my many years as late night show host meets investigative journalist meets comic genius meets veritable sex god (though Wikipedia only acknowledges the first of these accomplishments, despite my many attempts at editing the listing) they have turned on me.

    I’m a gif. And a meme.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    31,481
    Chapters:
    10/10
    Collections:
    6
    Comments:
    439
    Kudos:
    999
    Bookmarks:
    297
    Hits:
    14,295

    17 Feb 2025

  15. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    After Aziraphale returns from Edinburgh (end of S2 Ep4), a mysterious downpour from above sends Crowley back into the shelter of the bookshop, forcing him to look into his angel's eyes and attempt to admit that they are made for each other.

    But, the course of true love never did run smooth. Hijinks and vavoom-ing and angst ensue through the Season 2 canon and beyond.

    ...

    Aziraphale turns around. Crowley’s glasses are off and his eyes are blown wide with something like an answering craving to Aziraphale’s own. And also fear. Definitely fear.

    “Right. Ok. Mmmm. I think it’s now or never, angel.”

    Aziraphale can only stare. But Crowley seems to be waiting for an answer, for permission to proceed. They stand there together, their gazes locked, on the edge of the precipice they’ve been dancing along for 6,000 years. Water still drips from the hems of Crowley’s clothes and onto the floor in a quiet, hypnotic rhythm.

    Aziraphale manages to take a shaky breath. And then he nods.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    42,109
    Chapters:
    14/14
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    196
    Kudos:
    630
    Bookmarks:
    160
    Hits:
    11,917

    19 Jan 2025

  16. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    The image of Aziraphale — his bowtie undone and his coat long abandoned, his shirtsleeves rolled up to his elbows — with a newborn tucked snugly in the crook of his arm like some sort of angelic nanny will stay with Crowley long after this world is nothing but a smoking crater.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,569
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    254
    Kudos:
    1,669
    Bookmarks:
    608
    Hits:
    13,027

    18 Jan 2025

  17. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    The Apocalypse has come and gone, and Aziraphale knows it's finally time to tell Crowley how he really feels. Only, finding the perfect time to confess is proving to be more difficult than he anticipated...

    Or, 5 Times Aziraphale Almost Confessed His Feelings + the 1 Time He Finally Did.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    34,250
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Collections:
    3
    Comments:
    223
    Kudos:
    838
    Bookmarks:
    247
    Hits:
    11,187

    22 Nov 2024

  18. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    "Confidential journals,” Aziraphale calls them. Well, if he’d been so concerned with keeping his precious diaries safe from prying yellow eyes, maybe he shouldn’t have abandoned said eyes alone on Earth and fucked off back to Heaven.

     

    A story about the following, in no particular order: boxing up old memories, unpacking even older ones, lots and lots of red wine, Muriel trying on sunglasses they're not supposed to, neatly looping cursive, Crowley getting his groove back, and an angel and a demon who are figuring love out.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    105,772
    Chapters:
    11/11
    Comments:
    762
    Kudos:
    1,237
    Bookmarks:
    426
    Hits:
    23,594

    12 Mar 2024

  19. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “But you admit it! You did tempt me!”

    “I offered you warm food during a storm,” Crowley argues. “If you call that temptation, I’d hate to see you talk to an innkeeper.” Aziraphale scowls some more. Crowley shrugs. “Besides, no harm done. You seem to be enjoying yourself.”

    He has Aziraphale there. “Still,” he says, spreading his hands wide. “It has to be said—” He glances up to the sky. “—for anyone listening, that I am not at fault for my appetite.”

    “Never said you were,” Crowley says. “Just said you liked the oysters.”

    or, an examination vis-à-vis food and forgiveness

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    29,115
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    252
    Kudos:
    1,888
    Bookmarks:
    708
    Hits:
    23,284

    26 Feb 2024

  20. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “What are you,” Crowley drawled, “the patron saint of queer kids?”

     

    A series of lost souls over the centuries who prayed, whether they knew it or not, to the Angel Aziraphale.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,263
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    111
    Kudos:
    1,562
    Bookmarks:
    374
    Hits:
    8,938

    10 Nov 2023

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