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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Ilya let out a quiet laugh, shaking his head. “I want to be perfect for you, Shane. To make up for all the time we lost.”

    “I don’t want perfect,” Shane said quietly, stroking Ilya’s cheek. “I want something real. Something that we fight to make work, because we want it so much. Because being together is so much fucking better than being without each other.”

    ***

    Ten years ago, Shane and Ilya loved each other in secret and let each other go anyway.

    Now Shane, captain of the Ottawa Centaurs, is a single dad to four-year-old Ollie, and good at pretending he doesn’t think about the man he lost when they were younger and terrified of the fallout of being caught. Then one chance meeting turns into drinks, lingering looks, old feelings, and suddenly Ilya Rozanov is everywhere again.

    Some things, it turns out, never really leave you.

    As Shane and Ilya fall back into each other’s lives - and into something softer, steadier, and openly theirs this time — they realise maybe they’re finally ready for the life they used to dream about.

    Or: two hockey players who were each other’s first love reconnect ten years later and slowly build the family they always wanted.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    104,069
    Chapters:
    15/16
    Comments:
    2,115
    Kudos:
    3,577
    Bookmarks:
    1,377
    Hits:
    117,905

    14 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Shane and Ilya meet as first-year students at The Juilliard School of Music. What started as a bit of fun competition in the violin section turned into something more - until Ilya disappeared the summer after Freshman year.
    10 years later, Ilya returns to New York City as the Assistant Conductor for the New York Philharmonic. What he doesn’t expect is to see Shane Hollander sitting first chair violin.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    44,024
    Chapters:
    9/?
    Comments:
    178
    Kudos:
    147
    Bookmarks:
    100
    Hits:
    5,313

    14 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Conductor Ilya, Concertmaster Shane

  3. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    "Anya," Shane said. The firm voice. The one that meant sit, wait, leave it. "Easy."

    She did not sit.

    She did not leave it.

    She knew what leave it meant. She had left many things in her life—shoes, food on low tables, interesting dead things on walks, and she had done so because the rules were the rules and she was a creature who respected them. This was different. Leave it applied to objects.

    This was a breach of territory. This was a matter of pack safety.

    The rules, she felt certain, had not accounted for this.

    Post-TLG: Five times Anya battled to protect her pack, and one time she simply stood watch (like the good girl she is).

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,035
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    237
    Kudos:
    1,225
    Bookmarks:
    252
    Hits:
    12,117

    12 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    ANYA POV!!!

  4. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “Why the fuck do you care what happens to Rozanov?”

    Shane doesn’t answer.

    He’s already running for the Raiders’ locker room.

    ⎯⎯⎯

    Or, Ilya has a panic attack in the Raiders' locker room after getting a phone call from his brother telling him about his father’s death.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    47,057
    Chapters:
    17/?
    Comments:
    2,535
    Kudos:
    18,945
    Bookmarks:
    5,752
    Hits:
    411,224

    08 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Starts with Ilya panic attack, they come out to Marly, Sveta, and Hollanders sooner, chapter 16 is hospital after Shane’s injury.

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    No serious hockey fan or sports commentator worth their salt would have considered record-breaking Boston superstar Ilya Rozanov to be Shane Hollander’s rival exactly, but sleeping with a man who had a specific offense-related vendetta against him and a wrist shot like a jet engine to back it up was probably ill-advised just the same.

    Or, Shane is a goalie. Ilya can’t score.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    148,928
    Chapters:
    18/18
    Comments:
    8,522
    Kudos:
    20,511
    Bookmarks:
    8,307
    Hits:
    648,303

    06 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Goalie Shane!

  6. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    ~And from your lips, he drew the Hallelujah

    Ilya Rozanov leaves Boston and signs with Ottawa, trying to fight a slow slide into emptiness and find meaning in his life again. Shane Hollander is a lonely, struggling artist who lost his spark. When they meet by chance, they both have to decide what's worth living for.

    Or…Shane never gets the chance to become a pro hockey player, so they meet a little later in life. Basically, they’re both sad boys, but the healing will be worth it. More baggage, fewer hangups.

    ~You see I used to live alone before I knew ya.

    ——————————————————

    “So maybe we would have played together,” Ilya said.

    “Yeah. Maybe we would have been rivals,” Shane said, and that got a grin out of him. He couldn’t quite imagine it, but he thought that would have been fun, facing off against Ilya Rozanov. In another life.

    Ilya nodded slowly. “And yet here we are, meeting anyway. Maybe we were meant to.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    120,745
    Chapters:
    16/16
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    1,466
    Kudos:
    2,934
    Bookmarks:
    1,275
    Hits:
    73,639

    05 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Shane is a painter.

  7. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    The NHL keeps a Central Registry of every team’s Emergency Backup Goaltender, or EBUG, an individual who must be prepared to play for either the home or visiting team should both goalies be taken out of commission. When the Registry was digitized in the mid 90’s a clerical error was made, and David Hollander has remained on file as Montreal’s EBUG. When Boston plays a preseason game in Montreal at the beginning of the 2017/2018 season, both of their goalies are taken out and David Hollander suddenly finds himself in the net in Boston black and yellow.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,731
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    381
    Kudos:
    4,271
    Bookmarks:
    1,101
    Hits:
    28,077

    28 May 2026

  8. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    After the longest season of his career, Ilya retreats to the cottage with Shane, expecting rest, recovery, and a month of stolen peace. Instead, exhaustion lingers. Small things feel wrong. And the body that has always carried him through pain begins to falter in ways he can’t explain.

    As concern grows and outside eyes begin to notice, the life Ilya and Shane have carefully built—careers, borders, futures—starts to feel fragile. When a medical crisis shatters their summer before answers arrive, love is no longer something they protect quietly. It becomes something they fight with.

    A story about what happens when the body speaks before you’re ready to listen, and the people who refuse to let you face it alone.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    55,266
    Chapters:
    30/30
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    635
    Kudos:
    5,944
    Bookmarks:
    2,070
    Hits:
    172,192

    16 May 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Ilya beats cancer.

  9. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    One delayed flight. One closing airport bar. One truth or dare game that gets significantly out of hand.
    Ilya Rozanov came to his ex-girlfriend's wedding to prove he was over it. Shane Hollander came to his best friend's wedding to prove he was fine. They were both lying, but they didn't know that about each other yet.

    Then they had to share a room.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    82,028
    Chapters:
    8/8
    Comments:
    2,398
    Kudos:
    6,660
    Bookmarks:
    2,891
    Hits:
    201,479

    12 May 2026

  10. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    4 times Shane was strict with Ilya and the 1 time he wasn't ft Ilya having an emotional crisis over it.

    OR: inspired by the tweet: ilya actually love having a strict boyfriend. like no his bitch do not let him have friends NO he not allowed to be out past 11 and NO U CANNOT SIT HERE!!!

    Translation in Russian and Mandarin!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,451
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    838
    Kudos:
    42,392
    Bookmarks:
    8,617
    Hits:
    361,733

    01 May 2026

  11. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Welcome to my conspiracy theory that there is an alternate timeline to the Great Tuna Meltdown of October 2016. What would have happened if Shane *had* stayed the night? This is a look at the evening and morning that could have been.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    26,107
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    890
    Kudos:
    8,105
    Bookmarks:
    2,061
    Hits:
    75,903

    01 May 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Tuna Melt Fixit!!!

  12. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    2014: Ilya Rozanov shocks the world and breaks Shane Hollander’s heart by disappearing without explanation, and without a goodbye kiss.

    2024: A devastating injury forces Shane to retire early, so he moves to a small town to coach girls hockey and figure out what the hell to do with the rest of his life.

    When recently divorced Ilya Rozanov walks into the rink with his twin girls, Shane has to decide if he’s brave enough to risk a second chance on a broken heart, and a rekindled romance with the first and only boy he ever loved.

    ***

    “So.” Ilya cleared his throat. “Should we tell the girls their Papa and their coach used to date?”

    “We didn’t date. We hooked up a few times, then you disappeared.” Shane looked away to hide his heartbreak as he lied, “It doesn’t even matter. It’s not like I loved you or anything.”

    “No, of course not.” Ilya tried to smile through a lie of his own, “I didn’t love you either.”

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    296,453
    Chapters:
    18/?
    Comments:
    8,911
    Kudos:
    18,395
    Bookmarks:
    7,071
    Hits:
    958,724

    21 Apr 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Twin dad, baker Ilya; Coach Shane.

  13. Public Bookmark *

    Words:
    34,570
    Works:
    4
    Bookmarks:
    513

    19 Apr 2026

  14. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    At eleven years old Ilya Rozanov's class is given an assignment:

    They will be randomly paired with a student at another school in Canada via email. In order to get full credit on the assignment, they must send at least five emails back and forth and gather enough information to write their project.

    After seven years, Ilya is pretty sure he's done enough for 100%

    or

    Shane and Ilya sending emails throughout the years. What happens when they meet?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    67,472
    Chapters:
    21/21
    Comments:
    8,915
    Kudos:
    40,473
    Bookmarks:
    11,407
    Hits:
    768,537

    19 Apr 2026

  15. Public Bookmark *

    Summary

    Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov fell in love in 2008. Just because their love story has to remain behind closed doors, doesn't mean they have to pretend it's not happening.

    a fix-it from the beginning, where they actually get their cute romance.

    Words:
    138,469
    Works:
    13
    Bookmarks:
    3,673

    19 Apr 2026

  16. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Shane is still learning that he doesn't have to be perfect in his own relationship. Ilya is still learning the rules of Shane's bad days. So when Shane tries to push him away after a crushing loss, it leads to a tense argument. But ten years of rivalry are no match for Shane’s tears; the second he starts to cry, Ilya folds like a house of cards.

    Or: Shane tries to starve himself as punishment for losing, Ilya tries to feed him, and it turns into a very soft night of pampering because Ilya is legally incapable of staying angry at a crying Shane.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,607
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    712
    Kudos:
    23,089
    Bookmarks:
    5,943
    Hits:
    253,126

    16 Apr 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Ilya cares for Shane after sensory breakdown and does it PERFECTLY.

  17. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Immediately following the events of Episode 6, Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov return to the cottage and spend the next number of days talking, fucking, and sharing secrets about their relationship the other person doesn't know.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,850
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1,394
    Kudos:
    10,625
    Bookmarks:
    3,180
    Hits:
    127,582

    06 Apr 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Exactly what I needed. They TALK about Tuna Meltdown and Rose and Russian love confession. This is restorative fiction.

  18. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Cliff Marleau gets assigned to keep the new Russian rookie out of trouble. Fifteen years later, he gives a speech at Ilya's wedding.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,275
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1,671
    Kudos:
    17,926
    Bookmarks:
    4,162
    Hits:
    141,875

    02 Apr 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Cliff Marleau is a good fucking friend.

  19. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Yuna’s entire body aches, and it would appear that her instincts were right— Rozanov is small, and he’s vulnerable, and he’s tired, and he needed somewhere safe to rest.

    And Yuna can’t help the weird sense that she’s honoured— her home was somewhere for Rozanov to go, even if she and David knew nothing about any of it, even if they still don’t, Shane knew it would be safe for Rozanov here. Shane told him to come home.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,378
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    705
    Kudos:
    16,572
    Bookmarks:
    3,989
    Hits:
    136,986

    01 Apr 2026

  20. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Ilya knows firsthand that the world isn’t comfortable. It’s loud, bright, demanding, a harsh place in direct opposition to everything he’s recently learned about autism.

    Is it so wrong that he wants Shane to feel safe here? To carve out a space where, even if only for a few hours, he doesn’t have to grin and bear anything? He can just be?

    Or: Ilya Rozanov has a lot of good ideas. Telling his fuck buddy that he should consider getting an autism diagnosis isn’t one of them.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,094
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1,217
    Kudos:
    18,860
    Bookmarks:
    3,862
    Hits:
    101,737

    01 Apr 2026

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