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After a strange encounter, Kyle ends up a vampire and, through a twist of fate, he finds himself in an unusual symbiotic relationship with Cartman. It's unsustainable, though, and Kyle is forced to accept the fact that he'll need to regularly kill to survive. Cartman has a plan, however, and the two of them form an unlikely duo and, together, they hunt down and kill deviants such as pedophiles, sexual predators, and neo-Nazis.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 99,898
- Chapters:
- 32/32
- Comments:
- 511
- Kudos:
- 3,445
- Bookmarks:
- 492
- Hits:
- 91,072
Bookmarked by GoldenFlowdd
10 Oct 2023
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Bookmarked by GoldenFlowdd
10 Oct 2023
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Summary
"What's the first rule of improv?"
"Never say no!"
((AKA: After Craig's risky decisions land him a spot in theater class, he starts to understand the importance of empathy.))
Series
- Part 2 of Three Sides
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 79,645
- Chapters:
- 64/64
- Comments:
- 473
- Kudos:
- 1,260
- Bookmarks:
- 132
- Hits:
- 38,246
Bookmarked by GoldenFlowdd
31 Aug 2023
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saltwater in the afternoon by bonesandthebees (bonesandcacti)
Fandoms: Minecraft (Video Game), Dream SMP
21 Jul 2021
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Summary
“So, like, how much did this entire getup run you?” Tommy asked, glancing up to the guy’s face again. “This looks like big movie budget level makeup or something. It couldn’t have been cheap.”
The guy clenched his jaw. “It’s not a fucking costume,” he grit out between his teeth.
“Look, I’m not an idiot, pal,” Tommy scoffed. “It’s a little weirdchamp that your only hobbies seem to be dressing up like a mermaid to swim around at night, and trying to convince random teenagers you meet that you’re a real fucking mermaid.”
or, Wilbur's first time meeting a human doesn't go as expected
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 22,706
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Collections:
- 21
- Comments:
- 143
- Kudos:
- 5,625
- Bookmarks:
- 911
- Hits:
- 44,811
Bookmarked by GoldenFlowdd
22 Feb 2023
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Summary
Death has followed Tommy ever since he was a child.
After spending years being trained to be a ruthless killer, Tommy works as an assassin, killing targets without mercy or hesitance. After all, death is a much kinder fate then struggling to survive in l'Manberg's failing economy.
Most of the time, they deserve it. Tommy kills those who hurt others, those who swindle and cheat and kill. He ignores the irony in this.
Tommy has performed exactly 352 jobs, all of which successful. No matter who the target is, no matter the morality of it, he kills quickly, calculated, like he was trained to do.
This all changes when he accepts a job with Prince Technoblade as his target.
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probably most likely abandoned.Series
- Part 1 of Theo’s Minecraft Men Writings
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 66,046
- Chapters:
- 16/?
- Collections:
- 4
- Comments:
- 484
- Kudos:
- 3,124
- Bookmarks:
- 589
- Hits:
- 83,775
Bookmarked by GoldenFlowdd
21 Sep 2022
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A series of events that might go wrong (Please don't go wrong) by lostandfoundhobii
Fandoms: Dream SMP, Minecraft (Video Game)
19 Dec 2021
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Summary
"Come sit down with me, Tommy." Sam says.
He speaks in that serious voice, letting Tommy know that this isn't something he can get out of.
Tommy does as told, and sits down with Sam in the empty classroom.
Sam leans forward on his elbows. He takes a deep breath and looks Tommy in the eyes.
"Is someone hurting you at home?"
Tommy's entire world comes to a stop.
// this is part of a series and is not meant to be a standalone //
Series
- Part 4 of What the hell is wrong with you
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 51,241
- Chapters:
- 20/20
- Comments:
- 771
- Kudos:
- 3,649
- Bookmarks:
- 306
- Hits:
- 63,837
Bookmarked by GoldenFlowdd
28 Aug 2022
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Summary
Prince Tommy is an enigma—underestimated, unknowable, self-assured, and powerful.
Until, one day, he isn't.
A story about familial love, friendship, manipulation, magic, breaking rules, kicking ass, an ancient legend, an unholy sacrament, and a secret that will someday make the Beginning indissociable from the End.
(OR: The one where Prince Tommy elaborately pretends not to be the intelligent little BAMF he really is, and ends up getting bit in the tail for it.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 147,515
- Chapters:
- 26/28
- Collections:
- 6
- Comments:
- 1,664
- Kudos:
- 1,624
- Bookmarks:
- 362
- Hits:
- 47,292
Bookmarked by GoldenFlowdd
08 Aug 2022
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Summary
People had called him many things throughout his life; thief, scum of the earth, a useless little piece of shit-
Those were the words of stupid men.
Tommy is Borrower; the greatest, most magnificent supervillain in L'manberg, who is running the whole city, hell- the whole country amok with his glorious powers!
Tommy is also number eleven on the most wanted villain list. Which needs to be updated, immediately.
.
.
.
Or; Tommy is a villain called Borrower who can steal powers for a limited amount of time. This is his journey through becoming the number one villain, finding himself a family, defeating a brainwashing Egg, and overthrowing a corrupt Government for one of his acquaintances, while also running the adored Waffle House of the city at sixteen years old.Not in that order.
Series
- Part 1 of Pantomime Villain Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 273,444
- Chapters:
- 42/61
- Comments:
- 1,570
- Kudos:
- 3,964
- Bookmarks:
- 656
- Hits:
- 135,472
Bookmarked by GoldenFlowdd
01 Aug 2022
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Bookmarked by GoldenFlowdd
01 Aug 2022
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okay, guess we're doing this now by visceralzzz
Fandoms: Minecraft (Video Game), Dream SMP
23 Jan 2022
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Summary
“...You don’t feel any different about vigilantes than heroes and villains, I assume?”
Tommy shakes his head immediately, jabbing a thumb to his chest. “Yep, I don’t want anything to do with politics and shit. Kinda makes me want to trip on a landmine, land on my ass, roll over, just to drop into a conveniently open manhole, and then bash my skull into a random detonated landmine.”
“Oddly specific, any reason?”
“Duh, because Tubs’ has done it to me once before and I’m unskilled in dying any other way.”
Sam raises an eyebrow, electing to say nothing despite his many justified concerns.
or:
The day Tommy finds his life smack in the middle of a convoluted game of hot potato played by heroes, villains, and vigilantes alike, is the day he'll apologize for all prior sins and attempt to prevent himself from getting killed by this madness.
That is... If it doesn't kill him first.
(or, or: just a silly crack fic where tommy wants nothing to do with any of this, but he ends up getting wrapped up in just about everything, anyway.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 24,852
- Chapters:
- 4/13
- Comments:
- 104
- Kudos:
- 1,391
- Bookmarks:
- 205
- Hits:
- 29,921
Bookmarked by GoldenFlowdd
27 Jul 2022
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tommyinnit's clinic for supervillains by bonesandthebees (bonesandcacti)
Fandoms: Minecraft (Video Game), Dream SMP
17 Jan 2022
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Summary
“W-What do you- I mean can I- are you here to rob us?” The person managed to stammer out.
Siren snorted. “No. I’m just here to order some food.”
“Wh-What about him?” The cashier asked, glancing at Tommy. “Did you- did you kidnap him?”
“I mean… yeah, let’s go with that in case this ends up on the news,” Siren shrugged, looking back at Tommy. “I kidnapped you, right?”
“Yeah, sure,” Tommy agreed, knowing that if they said he was kidnapped, it would keep people from getting suspicious of why he was seen in public with Siren. “Anyway, can I get the chicken nuggets happy meal, with a coke?”
or, how Tommy—who is not a hero, or a villain, or even a vigilante—saves the life of one of L'Manberg's most feared supervillains, and accidentally ends up becoming the resident doctor for every supervillain in town (and maybe gets a family along the way too).
Series
- Part 1 of the world of clinic
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 188,572
- Chapters:
- 26/26
- Collections:
- 24
- Comments:
- 10,562
- Kudos:
- 71,266
- Bookmarks:
- 12,464
- Hits:
- 2,516,822
Bookmarked by GoldenFlowdd
27 Jul 2022
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waves crashing over your head by bonesandthebees (bonesandcacti)
Fandoms: Dream SMP, Minecraft (Video Game)
01 Aug 2022
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Summary
“You- You’re Wilbur Soot,” Tommy stammered, gaping at his childhood hero.
Wilbur grinned. “You’ve heard of me?”
“Heard of you?” Tommy let out a breathless laugh. “You were, like, my favorite surfer when I was a kid! You’re the whole fucking reason I went pro in the first place!”
...
Suddenly, Tommy’s eyes widened as he realized what Wilbur was saying.
“Are you asking me if I want to try surfing big waves here?” Tommy asked, frowning at Wilbur.
Wilbur nodded. “I can teach you.”
or, there's quite the difference between normal surfing and big wave surfing. Tommy gets to learn that firsthand.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 19,695
- Chapters:
- 2/3
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 77
- Kudos:
- 904
- Bookmarks:
- 152
- Hits:
- 10,485
Bookmarked by GoldenFlowdd
26 Jul 2022
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Summary
Tommy continues shuffling forward, just being able to see the exit doors that are wide open from between the legs of the food stands that hold the vegetables such as potatoes and onions.
He's just about to shuffle across to the potatoes when he's stopped abruptly by something falling from the sky and crushing the produce.
Well, he's glad he wasn't under that thing but still, the poor potatoes.
It's a moment later, after he hears the low groan of a very human person, he realises someone fell on the potatoes, not something.
The person slowly picked themselves up and pink hair fell from their shoulders to their back.
Oh fuck, Tommy knows who this is.
It's the Blade.
One of the top 3 leaders of the Syndicate.
Or
Tommy, while on a shopping trip, accidentally gets caught in a villain vs hero fight. The building collapses and he's trapped under it. At least he isn't alone in this.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8,232
- Chapters:
- 2/?
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 38
- Kudos:
- 925
- Bookmarks:
- 143
- Hits:
- 8,011
Bookmarked by GoldenFlowdd
06 Jul 2022
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Tommy's Fashion Fairytale by thetoyboxs
Fandoms: Video Blogging RPF, Minecraft (Video Game)
03 Sep 2022
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Summary
“Sunshine, Honey look.” a small whisper echoed in his ears, encouraging him enough to slowly look up to see his mom, her hair splaying down and seemingly acting as a curtain to the rest of the world. “Are you ready to see the world?”
Tommy remembers thinking that’s stupid, he already saw his world in his family. But he nodded along, and his mom smiled her signature smile, and he smiled back.
“Okay Tommy, show them who you are, the world’s watching.”
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Ever watch a Barbie movie? No? That's alright because throw that image right out and instead take Tommy as an anonymous Fashion Designer, being invited to the worlds most popular fashion show. With Tubbo and Ranboo as his main helpers he's doing everything he can to prove himself runway worthy.
Or is it not enough to say Good Alive Parent Kristin and watch as the readers roll in.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 18,876
- Chapters:
- 8/?
- Comments:
- 199
- Kudos:
- 1,231
- Bookmarks:
- 245
- Hits:
- 20,030
Bookmarked by GoldenFlowdd
27 Jun 2022
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Summary
Wilbur stared up at the boy that challenged the sun in front of him, blue eyes shining brilliantly and hair riffling in the wind like fields of golden wheat on a farm field, feeling as if he was about to be blinded.
A few years after Tommy's former mentor and guardian, Sam, dies in a tragic accident in the midst of the zombie apocalypse, he finds himself held at gunpoint by a curly-haired man with a guitar strapped to his back. Begrudgingly, the two become partners - and end up getting mixed into something much deeper and dangerous than the undead.
or, the fic in which tommy and wilbur accidentally get themselves into a bunch of shit.
Series
- Part 1 of wasteland
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 90,383
- Chapters:
- 20/20
- Comments:
- 931
- Kudos:
- 2,444
- Bookmarks:
- 571
- Hits:
- 63,204
Bookmarked by GoldenFlowdd
15 Jun 2022
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Bookmarked by GoldenFlowdd
15 Jun 2022
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Summary
But Wilbur is a ball and chain in the middle of the sea, slowly but steadily dragging himself down to the ocean floor with Tommy unknowingly trapped inside his cuff. It’s unfair that Tommy has had to drown with Wilbur for so many years, desperately trying to swim both of them back to the surface. It’s fruitless, and Tommy wonders sometimes if it would be better to just cut the chain that binds them together. To let Wilbur sink on his own, while Tommy heads for air.
He could never do that though; as much as he wants to. He’ll let Wilbur sink them both, and Tommy will swim and thrash as the surface grows more and more distant. Hoping and wishing for a lifeboat. For someone to help them to shore, and to pull Tommy’s freezing body into their warm, loving arms and drape a towel over his wet shoulders.
He thinks Phil might be that person, Techno too. Tommy wants to let them be and he wishes for Wilbur to want that too.
OR: Wilbur and Tommy are brothers in the foster system. Wilbur is struggling with addiction, Tommy is always left to pick up the pieces. But now with Techno and Phil here, hopefully they’ll be able to help. (Only Wilbur does not want help.)
Series
- Part 2 of Cigarette Paper
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 149,118
- Chapters:
- 25/25
- Collections:
- 21
- Comments:
- 1,062
- Kudos:
- 4,282
- Bookmarks:
- 773
- Hits:
- 145,792
Bookmarked by GoldenFlowdd
15 Jun 2022
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angsty teens and wednesdays at the jubilee line by sunkiss3d
Fandoms: Video Blogging RPF
19 Mar 2022
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Summary
It feels mocking, in a way. A simple, yellow line. The tape stared back at him, and Wilbur decided that he has had too much to drink tonight.
“Those are my cigarettes.”
“Yes,” he confirmed again, with a nod, this time. “Your point?”
“You stole from me,” Wilbur accused, raising an eyebrow at how casual the guy was being.
“I also saved your life,” he countered, and Wil sneered.
“I didn't ask you to.”
“Right, sorry, then. Here's my apology gift,” Tommy handed him a big object. Wilbur took it, and very quickly realized that it was a guitar. His guitar.
“And this is... my guitar.”
Or,
Afraid of unkept promises and drowning in memories of what used to be, Wilbur Soot tries dying. Instead, he finally finds a light at the end of his tunnel. Met at the Jubilee Line, and parted ways at the same place, Wilbur and Tommy were brothers.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 57,367
- Chapters:
- 12/12
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 208
- Kudos:
- 652
- Bookmarks:
- 149
- Hits:
- 12,271
Bookmarked by GoldenFlowdd
11 Jun 2022
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Wasting Your Time by shutupanakin
Fandoms: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF, Dream SMP
08 Feb 2022
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Summary
“Wh— what?” Tommy choked out, his voice hoarse from the lack of use all day.
The man rolled his eyes, as if he didn’t just ask a completely impolite question. “I said, do you have any booze?”
Tommy sat still. He reached into his jacket pocket, his hand finding only a plastic pen. Could he stab this man with a plastic pen?
Tommy pulled said piece of plastic out, visibly holding it up. “I have a pen.” Something about the bemused look on the man's face made Tommy click it, and again, repeatedly.
click click click click click click click click—
...
or; Tommy planned on dying. He meets Wilbur instead.
Series
- Part 1 of Jubilee Failed
- Part 1 of shutupanakin (writing edition)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 33,107
- Chapters:
- 9/9
- Collections:
- 67
- Comments:
- 1,635
- Kudos:
- 9,379
- Bookmarks:
- 2,361
- Hits:
- 174,134
Bookmarked by GoldenFlowdd
06 Jun 2022
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Summary
There are rumors of a prisoner in Pandora's Vault. Someone with incredible power, locked away for the safety of the public.
The Syndicate doesn't like that very much, so they make a plan to break the prisoner out.
None of them are expecting the prisoner to be a child.
Series
- Part 1 of To Speak
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,182
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 8
- Comments:
- 70
- Kudos:
- 2,276
- Bookmarks:
- 284
- Hits:
- 15,549
Bookmarked by GoldenFlowdd
31 May 2022