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The Last Will and Testament of Cazador Szarr by AbigailMoment
Fandoms: Baldur's Gate (Video Games)
16 Feb 2026
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Summary
"First," said Gale. "Do not kill any thinking creatures in Waterdeep unless you must to protect yourself or you have my express permission."
As Gale spoke, he could feel the weight of his words sinking into the person sitting across from him. It was like casting a spell, but took no effort. Astarion had been staring hollowly into his goblet of blood, but at this he made a faintly interested noise. As if the rule were novel and he was considering the shape of it.
"Second, you will obey me in all things," said Gale. There didn't feel like there was any honest way of softening that. Astarion didn't make any sound at all.
"Third, do not leave the tower without permission." Astarion made another speculative noise, considering this one too. But then his shoulders hunched and his eyes skittered down, as if he didn't want to look at what was about to happen.
"Fourth," Gale said, and paused. He started with some context: "There is a tressym upstairs."
Astarion's head twitched. He looked up at Gale, blinking, startled. He had the air of someone who had been bracing for a blow and instead had just been handed a balloon animal.
"A what?" he asked.
Series
- Part 1 of Will & Testament
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 234,497
- Chapters:
- 61/61
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 8,534
- Kudos:
- 6,037
- Bookmarks:
- 1,381
- Hits:
- 222,767
Bookmarked by lmgail
22 Jan 2026
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Summary
Astarion: HAHA! I manipulated and tricked you all into liking me and never abandoning me!
The Party: By making well-balanced decisions that met the needs of the group while helping us accomplish our short-term goals and listening to us talk when we were upset and stuff? Despite the fact you didn't always want to do that?
Astarion: Wait....
The Party: That's just friendship, stupid.
AKA: A collection of things that ostensibly happen in the same little mental universe. Loosely based on the events of an Origin Astarion run and the various questions it inspired. Not published in sequential order, but ordered somewhat by the narrative timeline.
- Words:
- 93,938
- Works:
- 9
- Bookmarks:
- 480
Bookmarked by lmgail
26 Dec 2023
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Summary
That soulmate AU where you get the name of your soulmate on your wrist...except instead of your soulmate, it's the person who kills you.
___“Can’t eat this,” Jon says.
Georgie looks up from her chicken sandwich. She blanches. “Jesus, Jon. You look—what’s wrong?”
Jon taps the top left side of his chest. “Name tag. Didn’t see until he gave us our food.”
“Oh. Oh! You mean...” Georgie looks around like she expects to see the grim reaper perched on a booth cushion. “Shit. Should we leave?”
“Well I mean—I don’t—I mean he might not be that Martin. And even if he were, there’s hardly anything I could do about it. You know how it is. I’d try to leave and he’d—he’d trip on his way to the kitchen and a fork would fling itself into my jugular or something.”
Bookmarked by lmgail
14 Oct 2022
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Excerpts from John Doe's Notebook, c. October 1934-January 1935 by Anonymous for robot_drawings
Fandoms: Malevolent (Podcast)
02 Nov 2021
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Summary
It's Arthur's idea, and John calls it a phenomenally stupid one as he accepts the small notebook and pen. The first page is blank except for where Arthur has written John Doe, October 1934 in neat cursive. Underneath is a small embellishment that John would have assumed came pre-printed in the book if not for the faint smudging of the ink on the left-hand side. It is the smudge that sets his resolve: He will use it.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,219
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 26
- Kudos:
- 227
- Bookmarks:
- 35
- Hits:
- 1,118
Bookmarked by lmgail
30 Sep 2022
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Now That's What I Call Entangled! by Croik
Fandom Cthulhu Mythos - H. P. Lovecraft, Haita the Shepherd - Ambrose Bierce, Malevolent (Podcast)
09 Dec 2024
Summary
On the way to the plateau, Arthur and John discover a spell in one of their books that will (hopefully) allow them to fight back against the King in Yellow. But when John ends up absorbed by the King, Hastur becomes whole at last, and he and Arthur are bound in an entirely new life together.
- Words:
- 124,256
- Works:
- 6
- Bookmarks:
- 178
Bookmarked by lmgail
28 Sep 2022
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Summary
Arthur grits his teeth and fumbles around for the soap. It’s a small bar, but it will have to do. “Look. I get that you’re angry, but this really isn’t the time for—”
“I’m not angry.”
Arthur scoffs. “No?”
“No. I’m … let’s call it grieving.”
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After killing Larson, Arthur and John leave Addison. They end up in a motel for the night, and when Arthur's emotions and traumas from the past few months bubble over into an inevitable breakdown, he finally communicates with John just what has happened the past few days and why Larson's blood has ended up on his hands.
Bookmarked by lmgail
27 Sep 2022
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Summary
To say that John is interested in the stranger who’s been sitting at the far end of his bar for nearly three hours now would be an understatement. For one thing, the man has only ordered a single drink and is still nursing it, even though the ice is completely melted and watered-down whiskey is less than pleasant.
For another, in the low light of the club, he looks just like Arthur Lester.
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Following the death of his daughter, famous film composer and pianist Arthur Lester drops out of the music scene and disappears from the public eye. Ten years later, Arthur now works as a private investigator and has no interest in performing or composing ever again.
John is intrigued by Arthur, who comes to his club to drink on the rare nights that there’s no music scheduled. As they meet again and again, they begin to grow closer. But Arthur isn’t the only one with a past he’s trying to run away from.
Series
- Part 1 of whiskey old fashioned sour
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 79,874
- Chapters:
- 12/12
- Comments:
- 394
- Kudos:
- 1,183
- Bookmarks:
- 216
- Hits:
- 19,068
Bookmarked by lmgail
26 Sep 2022
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Summary
John and Arthur have settled into a routine after escaping the Dreamlands. But when a suspicious theatrical troupe comes to town, the two must confront whether they've truly escaped the King in Yellow.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,771
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 42
- Kudos:
- 266
- Bookmarks:
- 69
- Hits:
- 2,131
Bookmarked by lmgail
22 Sep 2022
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a universe that doesn't care and people who do (Lighthouse) by SupposedToBeWriting
Fandom Malevolent (Podcast)
29 Dec 2022
- Words:
- 234,714
- Works:
- 3
- Bookmarks:
- 275
Bookmarked by lmgail
19 Sep 2022
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Summary
Arthur decides to help John acclimate to his new body by teaching him how to dance.
Sometimes all you can do is dance in the dark...
Bookmarked by lmgail
16 Sep 2022
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Summary
A quiet conversation held late at the night while imprisoned in the Dreamlands...
Bookmarked by lmgail
13 Sep 2022
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Summary
“Yes,” he says, “I am-- I’m perfectly well, thank you. I apologize for being late, I merely…”
He struggles for a moment for any sort of reasonable sounding excuse for his lateness that isn’t ‘I overslept’ or ‘I lost track of time’ or, even worse than that, the truth. That he is being refused his suppressants and he’s been fruitlessly scrambling all morning for any kind of solution that isn’t the inevitable, unavoidable, obvious answer of ‘just suck it up and suffer through a heat.’
Elias blinks.
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Jon and Elias spend a heat together.
Series
- Part 1 of Like the Fires of Hell
Bookmarked by lmgail
11 Sep 2022
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Summary
The Entity is in the hospital, stuck in the mind of a comatose Arthur Lester. Every second that crawls by is agonizing. If there is any relief to be had, it's his nurse. Lilly is the only one in the hospital that talks to him as if he might be there. Slowly, The Entity starts to realize what he wants out of life, and who he considers himself to be.
Bookmarked by lmgail
04 Sep 2022
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- Words:
- 21,676
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 180
Bookmarked by lmgail
20 May 2022
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Summary
“I think I’ve fucked up,” Stede confesses.
“Yeah,” Lucius tells him, “but don’t take it too hard. I might’ve fucked up, too, if somebody dragged me out of bed to tell me I’d ruined their family, and my own, and destroyed the love of my life’s entire legacy, and then, like— blew their own whole fucking head off. Like, that— I get that, Cap’n. That makes sense.”
Stede nods, keeping his eyes forward. After a beat, he can’t maintain the calm, and he needs the human connection, turning back to look at Lucius. He actually spills over, then, eyes burning.
“Oh, you don’t have to do that,” Lucius comments, but Stede is already carefully standing up so he can bend and hug Lucius without capsizing their vessel.
or: stede saves his crew, draws a duel, and reunites with the love of his life, though he's certain he's going to die every step of the way.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,017
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 234
- Kudos:
- 3,366
- Bookmarks:
- 633
- Hits:
- 24,845
Bookmarked by lmgail
27 Apr 2022
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Summary
“Do you think I could help in some way?” he asks.
Ed glances at him. “Like how?”
“I don’t know. You seemed to enjoy our little gag of trading places that one time.” Stede shrugs a shoulder. He’s wearing his pink satin waistcoat and matching breeches, no overcoat—too fucking humid tonight. Ed can see the shape of his arm through the thin linen of his shirt. “What if you pretend you’re the one who isn’t in charge, and I can pretend I’m the one who is. That would be fun, wouldn’t it?”
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Sometimes some co-captains invent soft domming to cope.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8,713
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 330
- Kudos:
- 4,839
- Bookmarks:
- 1,017
- Hits:
- 34,126
Bookmarked by lmgail
27 Apr 2022
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Summary
In a way, Mary supposes she’s lucky that it only takes one day for the pirates to attack her ship.
(Blackbeard takes a hostage, Mary takes some risks, and Stede takes everyone by surprise.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,688
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 332
- Kudos:
- 6,914
- Bookmarks:
- 1,190
- Hits:
- 33,524
Bookmarked by lmgail
26 Apr 2022
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Summary
"In those quiet, dark hours, Blackbeard usually disappeared, leaving Ed to rattle around the cabin by himself. If he still curled up with the occasional cloak or cried himself to sleep, who was there to tell the difference? Look, Blackbeard just wasn’t fuckin’ a hundred percent all there, all right? A good fight was just what he needed to set him to rights, he was quite sure. And if he died out there… well. He’d never tried it before, had he? It wasn’t like anybody was waiting for him. Ed and his foolishness had made sure of that, hadn’t he?"
OR: “This time, I think I’m leaving for good,” Izzy said. “And I’m taking The Party Boat.” “Here’s the keys,” said Stede. “Rental return is by the docks next to the jerk chicken restaurant. Tell ‘em Stede sent you and they’ll forgive the late fees.”
--
Blackbeard strides on stage and gives the people what they came for. The real Ed fights for his life. Stede rescues his boys and endeavors to rescue his family. High-speed naval battles and hurt/comfort confessions ensue. With deepest apologies to the Aubrey-Maturin stories, Hunter S Thompson, AWOLNATION, Jacque Bergeret, and party boats.
Bookmarked by lmgail
26 Apr 2022
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Summary
Ed and Jim are both new to this whole “committed relationship” thing, but apparently people in relationships get each other gifts. A difficult task when one has no idea what they’re doing.
People in love – at least, people from Stede’s world who are in love – get each other gifts. This is a newly learned fact for Ed, but it is a fact nonetheless. Mary got Stede gifts. Mary got Stede many gifts. The lighthouse painting still hanging in their shared captains’ quarters, that was a gift from Mary. Stede has half of a petrified orange beside their bed, a gift from his daughter.
Stede owns nothing of Ed’s. Ed has given Stede nothing.
This may, he realizes with dread, have been an oversight.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,015
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 325
- Kudos:
- 2,191
- Bookmarks:
- 509
- Hits:
- 9,993
Bookmarked by lmgail
25 Apr 2022
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Summary
"Hey." Ed reaches across because it's the only thing that feels right. He grasps Stede's wrist and smoothes the pad of his thumb across his knuckles. Stede stops fiddling with his ring and looks up at him, wide-eyed. "This isn't Captain shit. This is God shit. Are you God?"
The room is blank with silence.
Gently, Ed repeats, "Are you God, Stede?"
Stede's voice is thin and high when he answers, "I'm not God."
"And is God here, in this room?"
Comically, Stede looks around like he might find God perched on the edge of his desk, or pulling books from his shelves to examine the spines.
"He's not," Stede concedes.
"That's right, mate. Stupid bugger doesn't associate himself with pirates."
Or: The Revenge has been becalmed for six days. Ed has bigger things to worry about, like sharks and being in love.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,082
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 349
- Kudos:
- 9,604
- Bookmarks:
- 1,767
- Hits:
- 51,903
Bookmarked by lmgail
25 Apr 2022