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  1. *

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    Summary

    Link’s life had been quiet since he defeated the Calamity. Of course, to Link, ‘quiet’ meant it was filled with the sounds of explosions as he launched himself across Hyrule. But after defeating the embodiment of evil with nothing but an axe and a pot lid, wearing only a pair of boxers, fuelled by the eternity of rage in his heart, Link felt he was justified.

    He had died. It was only fair he got to live a little.

    So when a portal opens under his feet and Link finds himself face to face with himself, he decides to have some fun with this.

    Or, a speedrunning Link is dropped a hundred years in the past and causes unbridled chaos.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,915
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    6
    Comments:
    74
    Kudos:
    2,557
    Bookmarks:
    543
    Hits:
    18,400
  2. *

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    There is no way to tell which memory is her first. If she had to choose, she would pick the eyes; they were so bright, so mesmerizing. Or perhaps the pain; the overwhelming, nauseating pain in her abdomen. Or maybe the cold…

    Sage, she’d been so cold.

    When Jiraiya catches Orochimaru with an infant girl from one of his experiments, Orochimaru does what he does best: lies.

    (Or: that fic where Orochimaru fakes a redemption arc.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,180
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    179
    Kudos:
    1,213
    Bookmarks:
    493
    Hits:
    7,783
  3. *

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    It was admittedly rather difficult to explain why Alphonse needed to wear a suit of armor at all times, and even harder to explain why there was no body inside said armor. When asked, “Why do you wear that armor?” or reacting to, “Gah! There’s no one in there!”, the Elric brothers learned to have several ready excuses available.

    After all, soul binding wasn’t that common. There were plenty of other ways to explain an empty suit of armor, right?

    Or, Fullmetal Alchemist where everything is the same but the Elrics come up with increasingly more creative excuses as to why Al wears armor, and why his armor is empty.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,768
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    5
    Comments:
    74
    Kudos:
    2,696
    Bookmarks:
    332
    Hits:
    14,680
  4. *

    Summary

    It’s rather surprising that so many people, alchemists and non, were able to determine the cause for Alphonse’s lack of body and Edward’s lack of limbs. Even more surprising is how many people the brothers willingly told about having committed the taboo.

    So what if they took a… different approach?

    Words:
    11,930
    Works:
    2
    Bookmarks:
    570
  5. *

    Summary

    The Batkids swap costumes for fun and chaos (and occasionally important talks)

    Words:
    2,014
    Works:
    1
    Bookmarks:
    186
  6. 3

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    The art of purr-suasion.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,309
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    39
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    398
  7. 8

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    It's halfway into the 2025 season and the social media admins of formula 1 decide that it's time for some action. They settle on a new format of videos: Date the Grid. Basically, the drivers have to go on dates with each other while a camera crew films them. There are no more rules, no specifications or anything, just a date set for the first round.

    Just a very stupid story that I decided to write down anyway because I made up way too many scenes.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,890
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    101
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    1,105
  8. 37

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    “Call me Laogong,” Chi Cheng murmurs against Wu Suowei's lips.

    “Nope.”

    Chi Cheng rolls his eyes.

    “We’re married, it’s my right. You're my husband and I'm yours, I deserve for you to call me Laogong.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,541
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    377
    Bookmarks:
    37
    Hits:
    3,018
  9. *

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    “So!” Gojo clapped once, loud and sudden, “I was thinking… Let’s skip the awkward part, skip the small talk, skip the entire three-act structure—y’know, save time.”

    He tilted his head, smile blooming wide and unfair—

    And then, with the same reckless momentum of someone jumping off a cliff:
    “Marry me, yeah?”

    ⊹₊‧.☾𖤓☽.‧₊⊹

    In which Gojo Satoru walks onto a cursed site with a movie projector, a cursed seal, and a chance to star in his favorite anime, so—naturally, he touches the cursed projector.

    Now he’s trapped inside Naruto: The Last.

    Yes. The movie. The one with the moon cult. The doomed confession scene. The emotional damage.

    Whatever. He’s done weirder missions.

    All he has to do to escape?
    Survive the plot. Play the role. Kiss the girl.

    (Easy. He knows this story. He’s emotionally prepared.)
    Right?
    Right??

    On a sidenote, somewhere out there, Nanami is watching all of this happen in real time, Shoko is taking psychic damage, Ijichi is documenting everything—EVERYTHING, and Yaga wants to punt Gojo into the sun.

    (There’s also a small, lonely girl with a red scarf building sandcastles. But Gojo doesn’t know that part yet.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    27,159
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    144
    Kudos:
    320
    Bookmarks:
    115
    Hits:
    3,823
  10. *

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    A fresh infusion of smut to rival Regret of Chunshan has flooded the jianghu—and for once, it’s not Shen Qingqiu x Luo Binghe! Shen Qingqiu breathes a sigh of relief.

    But his reprieve is short-lived.

    What the fuck is “Bingliushen”?!

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    24,352
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    245
    Kudos:
    602
    Bookmarks:
    114
    Hits:
    6,581
  11. *

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    The first time Peter Parker meets (some of) the Avengers, it's in a sewer and/or warehouse-he wasn't able to get a good look at the place, sue him for his uncertainty-after he had (apparently) gotten kidnapped.

    The first time the Avengers meet Spider-Man, he's calling them jerkwads from the top of Hawkeye's roof... according to Hawkeye. In Peter's humble opinion, rooftops are communical property among vigilantes, especially during alien invasions.

    OR

    Seven times the Avengers were confused about Spider-Man's identity, and one time his identity was revealed.

    (A story told over the course of seventeen years, seven different world-ending catastrophes, and a kidnapping.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,291
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    19
    Comments:
    131
    Kudos:
    4,342
    Bookmarks:
    916
    Hits:
    27,891
  12. *

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    Summary

    "Fine, whatever. Love you too, asshole. I hope you enjoy your walk home with your stupid, grainy bread. Taking Nature's Own a little too much to heart, but sure," Dean tells him, flashing him a sarcastic smile and swiveling around in the aisle to march away. He throws out something over his shoulder, careless and barbed. "I'm not paying for that shitty cardboard." 

    Dean's three aisles over when he realizes what, precisely, he said. Thankfully, when he comes to this conclusion, he's holding a box of poptarts, so when he fumbles and drops them to the floor, it's not a huge mess. He stares down at the slightly dented box of Brown Sugar Poptarts, and he has a very swift and very unshakeable crisis right there and then. 

    Love you too, asshole. 

    No, no, no. Why would he say that? Why would he do that? In the middle of the goddamn grocery store while arguing about bread? That's not—that can't be how it happens. That can't be. 

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    24,182
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    15
    Comments:
    609
    Kudos:
    8,538
    Bookmarks:
    2,241
    Hits:
    82,307
  13. 13

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    Summary

    The cursed energy pulses again, now less a spike and more a wave that nearly knocks Yuuji over, but Yuuji feels his apprehension leave with it, replaced instead with something like hope, because he recognizes it now—!

    “Itadori, wait—!” Megumi rasps, finally, but his hand grabs only air as Yuuji is already leaping off the building.

    Yuuji barely feels the impact as he hits the ground running, running, running in the direction of what is unmistakably Gojo Satoru’s cursed energy.

    After the Shinjuku Showdown finally ends, Yuuji learns that some ends really can, literally, become new beginnings.

    Or, the world-cutting slash ends up creating two Gojos.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,846
    Chapters:
    1/2
    Comments:
    11
    Kudos:
    134
    Bookmarks:
    14
    Hits:
    646
  14. 10

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    Summary

    this is literally just the joke of "who did your top surgery" "oh i did it myself" but taken seriously

    so uhhhh yeah

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,176
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    90
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    582
  15. 82

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    Summary

    “Rumi is the first of her kind,” Celine responded, shooing Mira away from her desk. “Even the most seasoned hunter isn't going to know what to do with her.”

    “Okay, soooo what does that mean?” Zoey asked, looking between them, confused.

    “It means,” Celine responded, striding over to Zoey before putting her hand on her shoulder. “That we are basically doing fieldwork on what happens when a demon hybrid discovers themselves.”

    “Ewww, please don't say it like that,” Rumi groaned, embarrassed. “You're making it sound like I'm going through heat or something.”

    “Don't count your chickens on that just yet,” Celine responded, pointing at her. “That could also be a part of this too.”

    OR

    Rumi starts her first demon heat, which subsequently causes her to fully transform. Can Zoey and Mira stop her from fucking them senseless? Or will the horniness of the whole situation win them over?

    Unintentional crack to the highest degree.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,207
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    348
    Bookmarks:
    82
    Hits:
    3,327
  16. 90

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    Summary

    Essek had a problem. A human shaped, red haired, annoyingly sharp problem that had been tormenting him ever since Caleb had become a grad student at the Marble Tomes Conservatory.

    His solution to that problem, in hindsight, had been incredibly foolish. But how was he to know that after hours of searching the internet for the perfect video that he could take himself in hand to, letting himself imagine that he was the lavender skinned tiefling between the anonymous pale thighs — he would meet Mollymauk in all his ostentatious glory the next evening, wrapped around Caleb’s shoulders.

    What follows is Essek’s slow descent into the chaos that is the Mighty Nein’s friend group, and the tangle of feelings that comes from having a crush on your brightest student who you have watched be thoroughly railed by a very very pretty tiefling online.

    Or; A Professor, a Prodigy, and a Pornstar walk into a bar …

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    56,903
    Chapters:
    15/20
    Comments:
    411
    Kudos:
    525
    Bookmarks:
    91
    Hits:
    10,551
  17. *

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    It was a routine mission that really shouldn't have developed into a situation. So of course it developed into a situation. But to be fair, how was Kyojuro ever supposed to predict a Blood Demon Art that could transform him into a cat? But it's fine, all he has to do is get to Shinobu and surely she can fix it.

    He did not plan on running into Akaza, or to find out that Akaza has a soft spot for cats. He definitely did not plan on Akaza deciding to keep him, and tell him all about the wonderful slayer he adores.

    Honestly, becoming a cat has become the least of his concerns.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,394
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    397
    Kudos:
    2,447
    Bookmarks:
    444
    Hits:
    23,469
  18. *

    lulu's self insert fics by ,

    Fandom: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Avatar: The Last Airbender, Batman - All Media Types, Criminal Minds (US TV), DCU, Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga, Game of Thrones (TV), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Hunger Games Series - All Media Types, Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins, Hunter X Hunter, K-pop, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Naruto, Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types, Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, RWBY, Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan, SPY x FAMILY (Anime), SPY x FAMILY (Manga), Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies), Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types, Stargate SG-1, Stray Kids (Band), Supernatural (TV 2005), The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan, The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild/Tears of the Kingdom, The Walking Dead (TV), Twilight Series - All Media Types, X-Men - All Media Types, 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia, 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Anime), 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Manga), 文豪ストレイドッグス | Bungou Stray Dogs, 鬼滅の刃 | Demon Slayer: Kimetsu no Yaiba (Anime), 鬼滅の刃 | Kimetsu no Yaiba (Manga), 더 게이머 | The Gamer (Webcomic)

    12 Oct 2025

    Summary

    a place where i keep my self-insert fics

    the completed fics:
    - Love on the Brahms
    - A Pocket Full of Posies
    the fics i am actively writing for:
    - making sure my brother...
    - The Bewitching Hour
    - Kagura
    - and all i loved, i loved alone
    - the night the world burned down, we...
    the fics i am updating/editing really really slowly:
    - I See the Ocean
    - curious as a cat
    - Lusus Naturae
    - Pan's Labyrinth
    - Dreamers Live to Die
    - From Me to You, 13 Years Later
    the fics that are just there, updates may or may not happen:
    - How to Save the World in Five Easy Steps
    - la rivoluzione di angelo
    - It Sucks and I Hate it Here
    - Isekais Suck Balls

    Words:
    659,506
    Works:
    20
    Bookmarks:
    461
  19. *

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    Summary

    "According to Dante and a lot of Christians there are nine circles of hell: limbo, lust, gluttony, greed, anger, heresy, violence, fraud and treachery.

    Peter Parker was pretty sure he had now ended up in the secret tenth circle of hell, the one created specifically for him: embarrassment.

    Because what other possible explanation would there be for his terminal case of foot in the mouth disease? What other way to excuse the fact that he always ended up saying the wrong thing at the wrong time?

    Why else would he be going on a school trip to Stark Tower?"

    or:

    Tale as old time: Peter Parker's science class goes on a school trip to Stark Industries.

    It goes as well as you'd expect.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,565
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    43
    Comments:
    178
    Kudos:
    11,115
    Bookmarks:
    2,370
    Hits:
    103,091
  20. *

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    Summary

    The year is 4151 Universal Space Time (UST)

    The human race has spread throughout the universe, such that most have never seen Earth.

    Park Jimin is a twenty-one-year-old student living on a distant planet in a three sun system. He is minding his own business when one day, he is taken hostage by a starship Captain/Rebel, Min Yoongi.

    Jimin is furious and refuses to partake in this Beauty and the Beast story. He won't be some Stockholm Syndrome damsel, no matter how sexy Min Yoongi is. (How incredibly, jaw-droppingly, unbelievably sexy he is.)

    Inspirations: Star Wars/Trek, Futurama, Sailor Moon, Dragonball, Avatar: The Last Airbender, Final Fantasy and Ready Player One.

    Disclaimer: My crazies are contagious, sorry if you catch it. 0_o

    The Space Comedy that you didn’t ask for but secretly needed.

    Volatile Space Crack AU

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    114,508
    Chapters:
    29/29
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    1,186
    Kudos:
    2,509
    Bookmarks:
    632
    Hits:
    68,318

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