21 - 40 of 1,294 Bookmarks by Thejollywizard
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Based on a tumblr post about someone pain-swapping Chronic Pain Robert with someone else. It caught my eye. :3
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“I can take much more pain than you ever could, bitch!” Prism raised an eyebrow at Flambae as he stomped up to Robert like a child. “I’ve got fuckin’ powers, I’m naturally stronger, faster, and better than you, Mecha-bitch.”
Robert could feel the heat rolling off of Flambae’s body, drying his skin out where it touched him. He doesn’t quit with his rep as he turned, keeping count in his head as his deadpan expression locked onto the fiery superhuman.
“Wanna bet?” Flambae and Prism both perk up a little, Prism pulling her phone out and typing rapidly. Robert swapped the weight and started working on the other arm, ignoring the way his shoulder protested with a straight face.
Bookmarked by Thejollywizard
16 Nov 2025
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Robert accidentally gets hit with an aphrodisiac combined with demon's blood.
Since he's relatively normal, it affects him the hardest (see; at all).More fool him, he supposes.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 52,328
- Chapters:
- 17/17
- Comments:
- 1,044
- Kudos:
- 4,743
- Bookmarks:
- 702
- Hits:
- 81,804
Bookmarked by Thejollywizard
16 Nov 2025
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The Z-Team didn’t like Robert.
They were villains. They were fuck ups. They each had a giant chip on their shoulders that barely let them stand next to each other on a good day. As soon as his voice first came on the group call, they had to give him shit. If they didn’t start harassing him, the Blonde Boss Lady would have benched them thinking they were being mind controlled.
Every handler thought they could “handle” the Phoenix team. Tame them, make them palatable, water them down. Turn them good. So they didn’t like Robert.
But they did like his voice.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 22,602
- Chapters:
- 7/?
- Comments:
- 469
- Kudos:
- 4,241
- Bookmarks:
- 985
- Hits:
- 53,962
Bookmarked by Thejollywizard
16 Nov 2025
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Your Call Has Been Forwarded To An Automatic Voice Message by FileN0tFound
Fandoms: Danny Phantom, Batman - All Media Types
15 Oct 2025
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While trying to summon his boyfried, Danny, Tim accidentally summons the completely wrong demon. Now they're stuck with each other until said Ghost King is next available.
Written for Haunting Heroes Who Wrote That: Self-Insert edition.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,453
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 6
- Kudos:
- 68
- Bookmarks:
- 12
- Hits:
- 544
Bookmarked by Thejollywizard
16 Nov 2025
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3 AM (That Time I Was Reincarnated Into A Coffee Shop AU) by deadstart
Fandoms: Danny Phantom, Batman - All Media Types
15 Oct 2025
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Summary
Oh, dear god, am I in a fucking coffee shop AU?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,183
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 14
- Kudos:
- 83
- Bookmarks:
- 8
- Hits:
- 617
Bookmarked by Thejollywizard
16 Nov 2025
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I Guess I Have A Kid Now by EvaDragon
Fandoms: Danny Phantom, Batman - All Media Types, Superman - All Media Types, DCU, Justice League - All Media Types
29 Oct 2025
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Summary
I get dropped into a new dimension. One filled with superheroes and whatnot. Just as I'm coming to terms with that, a kid gets shot at. Well...Where I'm from that doesn't fly. Like at all. So I do what any good Texan does, and shoot back. Especially when the bad guys are shooting at a kid. A scared kid. Mama bear instincts go hard.
That's my kid now.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,825
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 10
- Kudos:
- 134
- Bookmarks:
- 27
- Hits:
- 1,270
Bookmarked by Thejollywizard
16 Nov 2025
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Breaking news! Street photo of Wayne's omega son OMG!😱📸 #JasonToddWayne
(Turn on Show Creator Style for this!!)
Omega Jason Todd Week Day 7: “You didn’t deserve him then, you don’t deserve him now, and you never will.” | Paparazzi get photos of the Wayne omega that go viral | Everyone wants Jason
Series
- Part 30 of Dickjay Week/OJTW 2023
- Part 64 of DC Universe Fan Comics series
- Part 107 of DC one-shots
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,524
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 23
- Kudos:
- 1,513
- Bookmarks:
- 185
- Hits:
- 24,052
Bookmarked by Thejollywizard
16 Nov 2025
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Dice Heart by Nabes (naberriel)
Fandoms: DCU (Comics), Batman - All Media Types, Justice League - All Media Types
02 Jan 2021
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Summary
"Tone down that southern drawl, Dante," she advised, "Remember, you're a bland rich, white man in America. Get rid of that sicilian spiciness. Forget that you're a southern belle." She pointed her finger at me. "Dante Morgan, CEO of Haven Industries. Short-term millionaire and aspiring tax-evader."
I decided then and there to never tell her about my grand plans to become the League's antagonist and love interest. Go big or go home, and in this case, my young ward was a merciless landlord.
OR: How a suave tsundere—yes, they exist—decides to stop panicking about being a Justice League-level villain and enjoy the attention.
Series
- Part 1 of World's Finest Strangers
Bookmarked by Thejollywizard
16 Nov 2025
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Queen Tilde and Prince Consort Eggsy have the best sort of political marriage you can hope for. They are friendly, work well together, and both countries prosper because of the marriage. They sleep together just enough to try for an heir. Tilde has been in love with her personal guard Roxy Morton almost her whole life and it is a very open secret in the kingdom that they are together. Tilde sees that Eggsy is lonely, and worried for her friend, insists that Harry procure a companion for Eggsy, no matter the cost. Her husband needs some loving, and he will have it. Harry who practically raised Eggsy and is his chief advisor, well knows what Eggsy likes and it would be difficult to find in a whorehouse. Instead he manages to find a snarky older blacksmith with a bad leg who has fallen on poor enough times that he has offered himself in an indentured servant contract. Merlin figures that a good room, and being a royal's toy is better than the mines and goes along with it. And of course, Eggsy and Merlin fall in love.
Bookmarked by Thejollywizard
14 Nov 2025
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Morton's Marvelous Misadventures: The Professor and the Social Darling by anarchycox for thenerdyindividual
Fandoms: Kingsman (Movies)
24 Sep 2019
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Summary
Roxy Morton is the daughter of a rich man, whose titles have been in the family since the 14th Century. She is an environmentalist and social media darling, with a huge following on Youtube and Instagram. And on her jaunts around the world, if she perhaps does some jobs for her dear uncle in MI-6, well, Queen and Country, Queen and Country. But Harry Hart, the best 00 there is, needs her help off the books. His best friend in the world Professor Merlin Elliott has gone missing, and his grad assistant Eggsy insists foul play is involved. MI-6 cannot get involved, but if a woman was to be on vacation and poke about...well.
Roxy goes and has to deal with Roman history, cultists, ancient ruins, and an absentminded professor who no one bothered to mention was insanely gorgeous.
She can handle this. Probably.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 17,068
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 110
- Kudos:
- 130
- Bookmarks:
- 21
- Hits:
- 1,776
Bookmarked by Thejollywizard
12 Nov 2025
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The Once and Never Again King by anarchycox
Fandoms: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, The Witcher (TV)
13 Jul 2020
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Summary
Geralt was once King of the North.
But that was a long time ago, and now he is a mercenary.
He comes across a bard protecting a girl who needs the sanctuary of the north and promises to guide them there.
And with them he finds his true purpose.
Series
- Part 9 of Witcher Bingo Card Prompts
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,667
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 121
- Kudos:
- 1,212
- Bookmarks:
- 151
- Hits:
- 7,012
Bookmarked by Thejollywizard
12 Nov 2025
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Geralt and his Brand New Toy by anarchycox
Fandoms: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, The Witcher (TV)
27 Jul 2020
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Summary
Jaskier's dick has caused problems, yet again, and this time, he is pretty sure that he will actually be killed. He begs Geralt for help, promising the witcher anything, everything to get him out of the latest jam. Geralt agrees.
A few weeks later, Jaskier finds out that maybe that promise was hasty, when Geralt says that the anything in question will be Geralt using Jaskier's body however the hell he wants.
And nevermind, Jaskier should have offered 'anything' to Geralt years ago.
Series
- Part 13 of Witcher Bingo Card Prompts
Bookmarked by Thejollywizard
12 Nov 2025
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Sick as a Dog by anarchycox
Fandoms: 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Manga), 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Anime)
10 May 2025
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Summary
Nanami was sick, and the medication cancelled out other medication, tripping him towards a heat.
He has plans on how to cope.
Gojo and Geto have very different plans.
Nanami just this once is fine with a change to his plans.
Bookmarked by Thejollywizard
11 Nov 2025
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The Five Wonders of Merlin's Life and How a Sixth Appeared by anarchycox
Fandoms: Kingsman (Movies)
26 Apr 2018
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Summary
We all write Merlin as a workaholic. But what if he wasn't? What if he had a good support staff and word hard but fast, and only kept the long hours when agents were on very specific missions or something went wrong. His personality is such that people always feel he is around more than he actually is. The older agents are well used to this and know why, but Eggsy doesn't. And then he learns that Merlin has 5 very good reasons not to be a workaholic:
Audra 23
Gretchen 21
Bethany 11
Clara 8
Lacey 6
And oh god, finding out BAMF Merlin is the softest guy ever? Eggsy's heart is completely doomed. Doomed. DOOMED.Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 44,627
- Chapters:
- 18/18
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 1,127
- Kudos:
- 1,027
- Bookmarks:
- 151
- Hits:
- 15,735
Bookmarked by Thejollywizard
11 Nov 2025
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Summary
Michelle doesn't know how many times she has to tell the idiots that she lives with the butcher isn't flirting via discounted bacon. That the very nice and very clever and very handsome Sean...Mr. McKnight...the butcher, isn't flirting with her. He is just a very friendly sort. Besides a man like that wouldn't be interested in a mess like her.
Sean doubts he'll ever get the courage up to ask Michelle out, and besides she is too sweet and pretty to be interested in a failure like him.
The Idiot Squad all want Michelle to be happy.
They will make it happen, they totally have love figured out by now and matchmaking will be a breeze.
Percival also really appreciates the savings they are receiving on steaks. But it is about Michelle first.Please read Chapter 6 of Good Families Don't before reading this (it will make sense if you don't, but a lot more sense if you do).
Series
- Part 5 of The Idiot Squad
Bookmarked by Thejollywizard
10 Nov 2025
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Summary
Direct sequel to I'll love you forever.
The Idiot Squad has to deal with two pregnancies. This is enough of a problem (that is a joy but still for these people a problem). They certainly don't need any more complications. Not a one. And definitely not Merlin's only relative a ne'er do well cousin arriving on their doorstep with problems of his own that need solving.
There are not enough fruit tarts in the world to help Merlin cope with all this change.
Series
- Part 4 of The Idiot Squad
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 24,871
- Chapters:
- 15/15
- Comments:
- 631
- Kudos:
- 1,015
- Bookmarks:
- 62
- Hits:
- 15,763
Bookmarked by Thejollywizard
09 Nov 2025
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Summary
Merlin owns Kingsman games, a video game company that his whole pack works for. The group have decided their alpha needs a mate and force his grumpy hermit ass to go out and meet omegas at fancy parties and social occasions.
So of course he finds his perfect mate in waiter Eggsy Unwin. Now he just has to convince the lad that it isn't a joke, that he really does want him for forever.Series
- Part 1 of The Idiot Squad
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 22,530
- Chapters:
- 11/11
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 744
- Kudos:
- 2,552
- Bookmarks:
- 448
- Hits:
- 40,903
Bookmarked by Thejollywizard
08 Nov 2025
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Summary
Eggsy has saved the day. It's brilliant being a hero - if by brilliant you mean exhausting and horrible and he wants to sleep for days and not be haunted by how many died. Only he isn't going to have time for that break. Because Merlin has kindly informed him, since he killed Arthur, Eggsy now has to take up that mantle. A job no omega has had before, a job he isn't prepared for.
So now, he has to rule a secret spy organization, while the world attempts to fix itself, and is receiving courting offers from everyone under the sun.
He doesn't want a mate, he just wants to survive.
And if he has to suffer the job of Arthur, then Merlin can damn well be by his side and help him do this, no matter that it isn't what the beta wants.
But the truth is, Eggsy has no idea what Merlin wants, and Merlin would prefer he never find out.
Only, Merlin seldom gets his way.Series
- Part 3 of Merlin A/B/O Trilogy
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 42,155
- Chapters:
- 20/20
- Comments:
- 982
- Kudos:
- 1,530
- Bookmarks:
- 316
- Hits:
- 23,811
Bookmarked by Thejollywizard
07 Nov 2025
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The Courting Season by anarchycox
Fandoms: The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
21 Aug 2020
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Summary
Over winter at Kaer Morhen with Ciri, Geralt realizes that he loves Jaskier, and has for years. Everyone at the keep decides the only logical thing that can happen is that Geralt court and wed Jaskier. But Geralt wants to do it properly. So the strongest, most fearsome warriors in all the land, research how to woo a minor noble and send Geralt back into the world with elaborate lists and a game plan.
And it all is going great. Courting turns out to be a lot easier than he expected. He and Jaskier will be married well before the return to Kaer Morhen for the winter!
Jaskier is thrilled to have his best friend back, and be off adventuring again. Geralt is behaving a bit oddly, but well, people get weird sometimes.
A fic where Jaskier is the romantically clueless one. Just because he sings about love, doesn't mean he'll see it - even when it is Witcher sized and holding flowers right in his face.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 47,262
- Chapters:
- 16/16
- Comments:
- 4,287
- Kudos:
- 8,828
- Bookmarks:
- 2,158
- Hits:
- 148,925
Bookmarked by Thejollywizard
07 Nov 2025
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Summary
In the absence of a working postal service the Smeerensburg post office has been (unofficially) repurposed as an (unsupervised) orphanage.
And now that's Jesper's problem.
Series
- Part 1 of Klaus Orphan au
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 102,974
- Chapters:
- 14/14
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 558
- Kudos:
- 1,809
- Bookmarks:
- 422
- Hits:
- 31,937
Bookmarked by Thejollywizard
07 Nov 2025