21 - 40 of 50 Bookmarks by What_Accountants_Do
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Stede Bonnet is having a day of it. He's suddenly getting divorced, he's questioning everything he thought he knew about his sexuality, and while exploring he's accidentally subscribed to the live webcam feed of popular camboy Blackbeard.
In the process he's won a competition he didn't know he was entering, to get a little more up close and personal. Unhinged shenanigans ensue.
Series
- Part 1 of Make Your Own Luck
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 31,829
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 360
- Kudos:
- 1,485
- Bookmarks:
- 263
- Hits:
- 15,799
Bookmarked by What_Accountants_Do
13 May 2024
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Edward Teach has been doing a lot of growing up and a lot of work at putting himself in a position to be happy in his life. He's begun to run his own business, created a safe space for people to explore their sexuality in BDSM and even as a 401k like a real grown up person. What he doesn't have is happiness for himself.
When he bumbles across Stede Bonnet late one night online, he ignites a friendship with a man stepping out on his own for the first time in his life, trying to find himself and beginning everything from scratch from a divorce.
What follows are two men that are utter idiots, a story of love, longing, friendship and long suffering friends that somehow survived what happened between them.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 234,276
- Chapters:
- 32/32
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 961
- Kudos:
- 386
- Bookmarks:
- 66
- Hits:
- 11,452
Bookmarked by What_Accountants_Do
13 May 2024
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Ed is having a mid-life crisis, and his new annoying neighbour is not helping (until he is).
Bookmarked by What_Accountants_Do
12 May 2024
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Your Love Might Break My Heart by blooming_aloe for vanete_druse, yerbamansa
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
29 Aug 2023
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Ed and Stede meet when Lucius, Pete, and Fang force their friend groups together. Stede and Ed soon realize they have a lot in common, including recent break-ups: Stede's divorce was just finalized and Ed's kicked CJ out... again.
Ed might not have had any plans to jump back into the dating pool, but he falls hard and fast for Stede. (CJ who?)
Stede's plan was to stay far away from the dating scene, and he's super psyched to have a best friend who feels the same way.
Miscommunications aplenty!!!
Bookmarked by What_Accountants_Do
12 May 2024
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After a lifetime to doing what was expected of him, Stede Bonnet finds himself jobless, disowned, divorced (happily) and newly out. He runs to the one place he had always felt safe: his late grandmother's summer home in Purple Bay, Nova Scotia where they had spent most of Stede's summer's together when he was a child.
It isn't the same without his grandmother Anne, of course. Stede misses her, misses his children, his ex wife Mary and even Mary's boyfriend Doug. Can he make a new life for himself here in this small town, can he carve out some happiness for himself? Can he make lasting friendships? Can he survive Ed, his neighbour across the road? He's easily the most beautiful person Stede has ever seen...
Bookmarked by What_Accountants_Do
12 May 2024
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Stede's birthday is coming up and all he really wants is a pirate themed party. His boyfriend thinks he's being childish and stupid. The handsome stranger in the cake aisle disagrees.
~~~~~
“Pirates, is it?”“Please don’t tease. I really don’t think I can handle any more ridicule today.”
“Shit, no I didn’t mean it like that. I’m a bit of a pirate nerd myself. Can I show you something?” He began unbuttoning his dress shirt before Stede could form the words to answer.
“What are you doing?” he started to ask, trailing off quickly as his mouth went dry at the sight of the man’s bare chest where he had pulled his undershirt all the way up. Stede was too distracted to finish speaking by the overall impression: a canvas of ink covered skin, muscular and soft in all the right places, a tantalizing trail of dark hair leading Stede’s eyes down, down…
Fuck. Focus, Bonnet.
He dragged his focus back to the inked images which were surely the point of this man’s public indecency.
~~~~(Mary to Ed, some time later):
“So, do you throw personalized birthday parties for all of your patrons, or just the ones you show your tits to in the grocery store?”- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 35,664
- Chapters:
- 15/15
- Comments:
- 472
- Kudos:
- 1,319
- Bookmarks:
- 281
- Hits:
- 14,084
Bookmarked by What_Accountants_Do
11 May 2024
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The Finer Things in Life by A_Very_Respectable_Hobbit
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
08 May 2024
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Modern AU where Ed is Blackbeard the tattoo artist (because I mean look at him) and Stede opens up a fabric shop and tearoom across the road from his studio. Blackbeard should be horrified by the sight of such a ridiculous business venture in his part of town, but Ed just wants to drink tea and roll around in the pretty silks and cashmeres and ogle Stede and his sexy legs.
Bookmarked by What_Accountants_Do
09 May 2024
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“You’re sweet, Stede,” Ed tells him. “I’ll do it.”
“I’m sorry?”
“I’ll do it. I’ll marry you.”
Stede’s mouth falls open, because there’s absolutely no fucking way this is happening to him, and yet—
And yet, Ed says: I’ll marry you, and it feels like a lifeline.
“You’re serious?” Stede asks. “You really want to do this?”
Stede doesn’t expect the beautiful stranger across the bar to say Yes when he asks to fake marry him. He also doesn’t expect to become fake fiancés with benefits, but it seems like they’re both going to get more out of this than they could ever have hoped for.
The only thing is, Stede always thought that when he did marry, it could be for love.
Maybe one day, it will be.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 55,209
- Chapters:
- 4/8
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 261
- Kudos:
- 258
- Bookmarks:
- 67
- Hits:
- 5,227
Bookmarked by What_Accountants_Do
07 May 2024
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Stede turns once to wave on the stairs—then glances back again, red-faced, when he stumbles on the next step.
Ed waits until he hears the door upstairs open and close before going inside the apartment, in a bit of a daze.
His gaze falls on the kitchen clock: it’s only noon. He still needs to take the clothes out of the washing machine.
“What the fuck,” he whispers.
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Stede moves into the apartment upstairs; Ed finds a home.Bookmarked by What_Accountants_Do
07 May 2024
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Looking for yearning? Looking for a fic heals Ed and Stede from the inside out? Look no further!
Museum biologist Stede gets stabbed and needs emergency surgery, Ed is his anesthesiologist. They meet again. They are cute. They become boyfriends!
Title is from the song: Beautiful Stranger - Laufey
Bookmarked by What_Accountants_Do
06 May 2024
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Honestly, fuck Jack. Ed could do so much better than fuckin' "Calico" Jack. Just because he'd been in a funk for a few years that didn't mean... Well, Ed knew he was attractive. He could be sexy. He could. And he could pull someone so completely opposite to Jack they might as well be from different planets.
Enter the gorgeous posh blond bloke at the end of the bar.
Oh, he would do nicely.
***
Ed and Stede have the worst exes in the world, but with a little bit of fuckery and a fabricated relationship (that's maybe getting a bit too real), they can help each other get them off their backs.
But what happens when their attraction to each other grows, and yet they’ve only agreed to touch each other when other people are around?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 100,426
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 604
- Kudos:
- 1,133
- Bookmarks:
- 326
- Hits:
- 25,080
Bookmarked by What_Accountants_Do
03 May 2024
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blue as cut sapphires and shining like gold by suchgreatheights
Fandom: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
04 Jul 2025
- Words:
- 440,258
- Works:
- 3
- Bookmarks:
- 152
Bookmarked by What_Accountants_Do
03 May 2024
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When Ed gets stuck behind the same slow driver for a long stretch of his road trip through the Pacific Northwest, that's one thing. When he finds himself at the same rest stop as the offending driver, it's quite another.
This Stede guy is a bit of a lunatic. But when Ed crosses paths with him again several days later, this time stranded on the side of the highway and in need of some assistance, Ed winds up on a slightly different road trip than the one he'd planned to take—with a man he absolutely doesn't plan to fall in love with.
Clearly, plans change.
Series
- Part 1 of We Belong Awake
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 352,593
- Chapters:
- 43/43
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 3,005
- Kudos:
- 3,168
- Bookmarks:
- 733
- Hits:
- 161,996
Bookmarked by What_Accountants_Do
03 May 2024
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Edward Teach is a pop star about to embark on his latest tour when he develops vocal nodes. Stede Bonnet is the voice specialist who treats him. Sparks fly.
“Right. And could you please describe your singing voice to me? Or sing something you feel showcases your voice, if you feel comfortable. For my usual clientele, I’d suggest their go-to audition song, but I don’t get the sense that you do much auditioning.”
There’s a long pause during which Stede takes note of the guy’s eyes. Not a literal case note, that would be inappropriate. His eyes are large and brown and expressive, quicksand eyes. Eyes a person could get lost in. Right now, they’re slightly narrowed at Stede. He seems to decide something.
“Listen,” the client says. “I appreciate you not wanting to make it weird, but I promise I’m used to it.”
“Used to it?” Stede asks, and there go the eyes again. Stede has the oddest sense of being taken apart, exposed, like the recurring dream he has of walking through the halls of his secondary school without a single stitch of clothing on, down to the same vague, unsettling sense that it should be more awkward than it is.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 78,592
- Chapters:
- 12/12
- Comments:
- 1,330
- Kudos:
- 1,528
- Bookmarks:
- 433
- Hits:
- 27,474
Bookmarked by What_Accountants_Do
03 May 2024
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Summary
After a series of hijinks leads to Ed accidently opening Stede's new box of "personal products," the best friends embark on a journey may change their lives forever.
This story fills the prompts for day 1 of Bottom Stede Week ("Not yet," leather, sex toys, and oblivious!Stede), and day 15 of AUpril (bookstore).
This is your standard friends to friends with benefits to lovers story. Lots of feelings, lots of fucking.
Series
- Part 1 of Bauble Verse
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 19,198
- Chapters:
- 7/7
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 75
- Kudos:
- 163
- Bookmarks:
- 21
- Hits:
- 1,734
Bookmarked by What_Accountants_Do
03 May 2024
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Ed thinks bachelor auctions are dumb. Until Stede Bonnet comes up for bids during the most chaotic bachelor auction imaginable, that is.
Bookmarked by What_Accountants_Do
03 May 2024
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Edward Teach and Stede Bonnet have just watched the crew of the Revenge sail away, leaving them to their new start as innkeepers.
A daily visit to their lives in the form of tiny updates over 100 days in their world and in ours, gradually charting a course through the Season 3 we all deserved ❤️
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 150,566
- Chapters:
- 101/101
- Comments:
- 1,893
- Kudos:
- 878
- Bookmarks:
- 122
- Hits:
- 30,100
Bookmarked by What_Accountants_Do
03 May 2024
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Lonely bookstore owner Stede orders some new toys to help on his journey of self discovery.
Unfortunately, the discreet packaging is damaged in transit, and mailman Ed, who's also his secret crush, sees all.
Fortunately, Ed is more than happy to help...
Series
- Part 4 of Silly Spicy Sweet One-Shots
Bookmarked by What_Accountants_Do
03 May 2024
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#NeedforStede by WellSussed (drcfxtina) for Frawg_Spawn
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
05 Apr 2024
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Summary
Stede’s hot, and his very queer audience has noticed. This is fine. It’s what Ed expected to see. He can relate, after all.
Ed should stop scrolling there.
He does not.
~~~~~
Ed's in love with his best friend, Stede--and once he starts becoming famous, so is the entire internet, and Ed's hot and bothered about it.
Series
- Part 1 of #ThirstVerse
Bookmarked by What_Accountants_Do
03 May 2024
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“I could help you, you know,” says Ed. “Like, the reinventing yourself bit. Or figuring it out.”
Hope hops on its feet, attempting takeoff. “You would?”
“‘Course I would, mate. You’re my best friend.”
----
Recently divorced, Stede isn't sure where to start on the whole "getting himself out there" thing. Ed offers to help, so they write out a list of Stede’s goals. The only problem? They both may be just slightly in love with each other. They just don't know it yet.
Bookmarked by What_Accountants_Do
03 May 2024