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Where The Duck Is Minerva McGonagall? by Rogue_Roxy
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
28 Jul 2025
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Summary
Welcome to a somewhat serious inquiry into the whereabouts of a very sneaky witch.
Hermione Granger (badass Auror working for MACUSA) has been summoned back to Britain by Kingsley Shacklebolt to help with an investigation. Of course, Hermione agrees; working with Harry again is going to be so much fun… only, it turns out that Harry is unavailable, and unfortunately, she gets stuck with Draco Malfoy.
Warnings:
- Hold onto your gold; there is a Niffler in this story.
- Draco Malfoy reserves the right to cast Aguamentis at hair he deems offensive.
- Whatever is said in the Cave of Plunderous Intent, stays in the Cave of Plunderous Intent.
- Approach any wine provided by the Icelandic Legend Erla with extreme caution.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 160,562
- Chapters:
- 26/26
- Collections:
- 7
- Comments:
- 1,436
- Kudos:
- 2,805
- Bookmarks:
- 1,299
- Hits:
- 141,175
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Bookmark Notes:
For when I need a good laugh
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Summary
“Hermione’s going to Indonesia,” Harry explained to Malfoy, who perked up as if the news implied a well-deserved holiday, “with Percy Weasley.”
Malfoy’s nose scrunched. “Ick. What on earth for?”
Perhaps Malfoy would be good for something after all, Hermione thought hopefully, if only to rub some of the Weasley shine from Harry’s lenses.
“Because,” she said crisply, “apparently it’s impossible for anyone else in the department to understand the exact nuance of Portkeys and therefore it is vital that the head of the department see to it personally.”
Malfoy frowned. “That’s ludicrous. What’s the point of becoming department head if you still have to go off and do work yourself?”
“Exactly!” Hermione said, then faltered. “Wait, no. That’s not–”
“What he means,” Harry cut in, laying a hand on Malfoy’s thigh, “is it’s ridiculous Percy is going when you’re completely capable on your own.”
Malfoy sniffed but heeded the unsubtle squeeze of Harry's hand. “That’s right,” he said after a moment, though his face implied otherwise. Hermione appreciated the attempt.
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Or where Hermione and Percy go to Indonesia.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 17,111
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 71
- Kudos:
- 505
- Bookmarks:
- 108
- Hits:
- 6,390
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Bookmark Notes:
Everything is Fine
Zeebee3
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Summary
A one night stand with her former Hogwarts enemy leaves Hermione with more than just a hangover.
Rated explicit for mature content, eventual smut, themes of pregnancy.
Series
- Part 1 of funny how? series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 93,988
- Chapters:
- 14/14
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 377
- Kudos:
- 3,363
- Bookmarks:
- 1,000
- Hits:
- 127,786
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Harry Potter and portkeying your problems away by WigglySlime
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
13 Feb 2024
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Summary
Harry experiences Portkey travel for the first time and decides 'hey it would be neat to know how to do that'.
The Triwizard Tournament and the Dark Lord had no idea what hit them.
Hint: It was a Portkey.
Series
- Part 2 of Harry Potter One-Shots
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,775
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 6
- Comments:
- 101
- Kudos:
- 2,820
- Bookmarks:
- 699
- Hits:
- 18,292
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Summary
The world believes Neville Longbottom is the Boy Who Lived. A prophecy fulfilled, a Dark Lord defeated… or so they say. But while one child was hailed as a saviour, another vanished into smoke and silence.
Raised far from the spotlight, under the wary protection of a fugitive godfather and a war-worn werewolf, Harry grows up on the margins of magic and myth. What follows is a slow, burning journey of identity: of a boy searching for a name, for truth, for belonging, and eventually, for justice.
This is not the story of a chosen one raised to glory, but of a child forgotten, who learns to carve his place in a world that never expected him to return. As war looms once more, Harry must decide who he is beyond prophecy, beyond even the name he was given.
Spanning seven parts, this canon-divergent series explores love, loss, and the strange alchemy of growing up. There is grief here, and anger, and the quiet courage of those who rebuild what was broken. But there is humour, too, threaded through found family and sharp dialogue… a story not only of magic, but of meaning. A story not of destiny, but of the names we earn and the ones we choose.
Book Two in progress.
- Words:
- 265,464
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 54
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Summary
Harry Potter, the boy-who-lived, has gone insane, and is now fully unstable. Not only that, the used-to-be-savior has betrayed the light side, going dark. All the while he is lying to everyone that he's on the light side.
Everyone knows that.
Harry Potter disagrees. He only believes they wanted someone to blame. And because he's such a people pleaser, that's exactly what Harry does. Be insane.
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Summary
“Malfoy, I know that you hate me,” The girl breathed desperately. “And the feeling is mutual. But if you have a drop of compassion in that evil mind of yours and one chance in life to use it, you have to fuck me…” She moaned again as her body reacted to the idea of his hard cock entering her. “Because otherwise I think I’ll die…”
“Fucking hell… Granger!” Malfoy breathed out. “What kind of a sick prank is this?!” He exclaimed.
“Potion... Wrong recipe…” She managed to say...
~
COMPLETEDSeries
- Part 1 of Dramione
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 45,005
- Chapters:
- 17/17
- Collections:
- 6
- Comments:
- 162
- Kudos:
- 1,640
- Bookmarks:
- 440
- Hits:
- 99,731
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Mrs. and Mr. Storm, and the family they created by SilverMorning
Fandom: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
16 Jan 2023
Summary
Snippets, missing scenes and alternate situations from Lightning, Meet Your Thunder.
- Words:
- 25,266
- Works:
- 5
- Bookmarks:
- 498
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Summary
The war just ended, and the world has been saved. But Draco Malfoy and his family are now facing trial, and Harry has to wonder whether he should reveal what he knows.
Summer ends, and the students have been invited back for an 8th year. How will Harry and Draco act now that they have been freed from their obligations? What will they do, and who will they become?
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Summary
Hogwarts' students on a field trip? Oh Merlin, it's chaos!
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 78,998
- Chapters:
- 24/24
- Comments:
- 190
- Kudos:
- 642
- Bookmarks:
- 418
- Hits:
- 33,003
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Summary
Draco Malfoy agreed to be one of the few chaperones on his son's spring class trip to Mexico. He didn't anticipate the hardest part of the trip would be dealing with the Hogwarts Professor in charge.
Series
- Part 1 of Legends of the Mayan Temple
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 141,777
- Chapters:
- 19/19
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 240
- Kudos:
- 497
- Bookmarks:
- 216
- Hits:
- 21,690
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Bookmark Collections:
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Summary
Hermione wakes up late and her portkey is ready to go off. Pausing it doesn't work quite the way she expected it to.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,228
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 10
- Kudos:
- 84
- Bookmarks:
- 10
- Hits:
- 565
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Magic and 3DMG by edwardelricistheawesomeness
Fandoms: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan, Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
04 May 2017
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Summary
After fighting some Titans Eren and Levi have found themselves at Hogwarts! Their be Ereri here. Rated M for language and such, and some later things. Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or Shingeki no Kyojin.
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- Words:
- 90,596
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 4
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Exasperated Harry One Shots by ArielSakura
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Doctor Who (2005), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Merlin (TV), Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, Supernatural, The Walking Dead (TV)
03 Jan 2018
Summary
A series of one shots, where Harry and Draco acknowledge their familial connection and are currently living together. Draco somehow continues to drag Harry into various messes/adventures either through curiosity or by accident. These are their stories.
- Words:
- 9,408
- Works:
- 9
- Bookmarks:
- 60
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Cabin in the Woods by prickly_cactus_n_tx for newtonn
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
27 Sep 2025
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Summary
” No Floo, no Apparition, no portkeys, no owls. Just you, Malfoy, and whatever questionable choices you’re about to make. You’re welcome.”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,080
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 12
- Kudos:
- 298
- Bookmarks:
- 49
- Hits:
- 3,876
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Summary
Hermione's understanding of mass-energy equivalence led her to the belief that objects couldn't simply disappear. Her interest sparked, it isn't long before she, and a meddling slytherin, find themselves unintentionally stuck in the place where the vanished things go.
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Summary
Harry Potter never had sex before until fifth year when his uncle decided to rape him. He was different like the so few Wizards who has female body parts.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 25,635
- Chapters:
- 27/27
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 77
- Kudos:
- 2,541
- Bookmarks:
- 299
- Hits:
- 380,703
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Bookmark Tags:
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Bookmark Notes:
spicy
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The Prisoner & The Polaroids by neilistic, PandaPatronus
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
27 May 2024
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Summary
Draco Malfoy languishes alone in a cell in Azkaban. It's bleak, and oh so cold.
Meanwhile, a new marriage law has matched Theodore Nott with a fertile wife — none other than one Hermione Granger.
Theo takes every advantage of this arrangement (and his newfound appreciation for muggle cameras) to send risqué photographs to Draco, hoping to bring a small light to his darkest days.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,037
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 109
- Kudos:
- 941
- Bookmarks:
- 205
- Hits:
- 19,217
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Bookmark Notes:
The Prisoner & The Polaroids by neilistic, PandaPatronus
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
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Draco Malfoy languishes alone in a cell in Azkaban. It's bleak, and oh so cold.Meanwhile, a new marriage law has matched Theodore Nott with a fertile wife — none other than one Hermione Granger.
Theo takes every advantage of this arrangement (and his newfound appreciation for muggle cameras) to send risqué photographs to Draco, hoping to bring a small light to his darkest days.
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Summary
Years after the war, Draco Malfoy works in the International Portkey Terminal, living a life of people-watching and paperwork.
Around the same time, Harry Potter starts getting sent on work travel. A lot of work travel.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,923
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 101
- Kudos:
- 725
- Bookmarks:
- 153
- Hits:
- 4,209
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