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The View from Halfway Down by supersillynewt
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
10 Jul 2026
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Summary
It went something like this:
“
On January 10th, at approximately 3:29 a.m., a single-vehicle collision occurred on the overpass of Charlesgate over Commonwealth Ave. Witnesses at the scene and surveillance footage indicate a an orange Porsche 718 Cayman traveling northbound on Charlesgate, in the rightmost lane on the Phillip G. Bowker Overpass. Footage shows the vehicle veering suddenly off the overpass at high speeds, colliding with a nearby tree. The driver, male, approximately mid-to-late twenties, was injured and unresponsive when authorities arrived. Airbag w/out seatbelt deployed successfully. Driver was quickly transported to Massachusetts General Hospital for treatment, there identified as Ilya Grigoryevich Rozanov. No other vehicles or pedestrians were involved in the collision.
“
Ilya Rozanov, before and after.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 67,226
- Chapters:
- 26/?
- Comments:
- 686
- Kudos:
- 1,492
- Bookmarks:
- 450
- Hits:
- 52,739
Bookmarked by thisismetrying13
15 Jul 2026
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Tell Me You Know (Tell Me It’s Okay) by inkstainzed
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types, Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
16 Jul 2026
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Summary
"Okay." Ilya takes a deep breath, letting it out. He lays down, resting his head on a pillow, and lays the phone on his diaphragm after he puts it on speaker. He hums, thinking. "Do you like chai actually? Or your, uh— friend, he decides for you?"
There's a long, long silence after that. Ilya swallows, hoping he hadn't asked the wrong thing. He went on a limb, in a way, because that's what Ilya always does. He assumes things, and butts in where he probably shouldn't and gives boys who look like they're emotionally one foot in the grave notes with his number on it. For some reason.
"No, he doesn’t." Shane says, eventually, and all Ilya's muscles un-tense. "I do really like chai. Caramel chai, mostly, if wherever I go has it."
"This can be arranged." Ilya says, his hands behind his head. "I am very good barista."
Shane snorts, then. Ilya makes it his goal to get him to laugh, and he'd say he's making pretty good progress so far.
Or, Shane is in a severely abusive relationship with his boyfriend, Ash. When they visit a nearby café one day, their server, Ilya, realizes something isn’t quite right between them.
Ilya can’t help but try and do something about it.
Bookmarked by thisismetrying13
09 Jul 2026
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Summary
It feels like a dam has broken inside of him.
All he wants is pizza. A donut. A milkshake.
If he can’t have Ilya - if Ilya doesn’t want him - maybe he can have pizza instead.
It’s a stupid thought. A dangerous thought. But it won’t leave.
Or, Shane doesn’t get injured in the game and Ilya breaks it off between them. Shane’s eating disorder spirals out of control as a result.
Bookmarked by thisismetrying13
28 Jun 2026
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snow angel (i'll make it through the winter if it kills me) by floydfairy, p3erhapschaotic7
Fandoms: Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types, Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
17 Jun 2026
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Summary
The pain has become too much for Ilya Rozanov to carry. For years, he’s lived with grief that never really healed, loneliness that followed him from Russia to Boston to Ottawa, and the constant exhaustion of pretending he’s okay when he hasn’t been in a very long time. Hockey gave him purpose. Shane Hollander gave him love. But neither could silence the ache left behind by losing his mother or the growing belief that maybe it was time to see her again.
So one morning, after one too many days suffering in silence, Ilya decides he’s done fighting. He leaves behind a letter for Shane, swallows a bottle of pills, and waits for the pain to end. Unfortunately for him, he is loved far too deeply for the universe to let him go that easily.
When the Hollanders find him in time, Ilya is forced into something he never planned for: surviving. And surviving means psychiatric holds, therapy sessions, difficult conversations, and learning how to let people care for him without believing he’s a burden. Most terrifying of all, it means letting Shane see every ugly, broken piece of him he tried so desperately to hide.
—
Or: Ilya Rozanov attempts suicide, but the Hollanders love him too much to let him go quietly.
Bookmarked by thisismetrying13
27 Jun 2026
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the third option by sevdim
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
15 Jul 2026
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Summary
A teenage Ilya arrives at development camp already planning to kill himself. Shane keeps accidentally interrupting his suicide attempts because he’s obsessed with rules, routine, and following proper protocol.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 35,528
- Chapters:
- 10/12
- Comments:
- 316
- Kudos:
- 775
- Bookmarks:
- 222
- Hits:
- 13,792
Bookmarked by thisismetrying13
27 Jun 2026
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evermore. by puzzlesandmysteries
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
24 Jun 2026
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Summary
Ilya knows what it feels like to drown—for his body to sink deeper and deeper into darkness, to feel pressure in his chest from the water filling his lungs—and right now his whole body shivers in the sharp, familiar chill of heavy liquid enveloping him from the waist down. He knows how this will go. He knows how quickly he’ll be thrashing in the tide gasping for air if he isn’t careful, how easy it will be to slip back down if he never tells anybody.
OR
Ilya has a bad depressive episode, and Shane helps him through it.
Bookmarked by thisismetrying13
25 Jun 2026
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Protective Factors by Milenia452
Fandoms: Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types, Heated Rivalry (TV)
14 Jul 2026
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Summary
Following a near-fatal suicide attempt, Ilya Rozanov is admitted to Calder Ward. He speaks almost exclusively Russian, refuses interpreters, and answers most questions with shrugs or silence. Staff struggle to establish even the most basic details of his life. Why he attempted suicide, who he left a note for, and what he has lost remain mysteries.
Across the ward, Shane Hollander is fighting a different battle. Intelligent, anxious, and trapped by an eating disorder, he attempts to maintain rigid control over food, exercise, and his body even as his health deteriorates. Despite increasing concern from staff, he struggles to recognise the severity of his illness.
As clinicians search for answers, the story reveals that recovery is rarely driven by dramatic breakthroughs. Instead, it emerges through trust, routine, patience, and human connection.Told entirely through clinical documentation, ward notes, emails, assessments, and multidisciplinary discussions.
Bookmarked by thisismetrying13
24 Jun 2026
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thinking you've got me brainwashed by mysterious_ky
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types, Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
19 Jun 2026
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Summary
It starts, as most things do, for completely wholesome and safe for work reasons. Shane just wants to help his boyfriend destress a little, and maybe find a few ways for Shane himself to relax a bit more.
However, as most things involving Ilya Rozanov tend to do, those wholesome and safe for work reasons quickly spiral into something hotter and darker that makes Shane shamefully hard, and that's all before he's even asked Ilya to hypnotize him into some mindless plaything. Fuck.
Series
- Part 1 of ky's hollanov hypno fics
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 41,388
- Chapters:
- 11/?
- Comments:
- 800
- Kudos:
- 1,584
- Bookmarks:
- 406
- Hits:
- 55,493
Bookmarked by thisismetrying13
21 Jun 2026
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Grigori, you motherfucker by Dnp
Fandoms: Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
21 Jun 2026
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Summary
This is really fucking intense.
Ilya Rozanov is out, married, and so vocally in love with his husband. Russia disagrees. He is kidnapped and taken back to Russia for some good old-fashioned 'convincing'. He doesn't break. They very nearly break /him/.
This story begins at the rescue, and will have flashbacks to Ilya's torture throughout.
Bookmarked by thisismetrying13
21 Jun 2026
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the toughest part is that we both know (what happened to you, why you’re out on your own) by barnes_romzanov
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
18 Jun 2026
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Summary
Ilya wasn’t trying to kill himself that night. Suicide is something that belongs to his mother- he’s just lazy, and he wishes Shane would stop making excuses for him.
Shane has everything under control. His body is a tool, the one that’s given him both his career and his relationship, and he wishes Ilya would stop prying into the way he maintains it.
or: Ilya learns a whole lot more about his mother, Shane remembers a whole lot more about his childhood, and they both get diagnosed.
Series
- Part 3 of Merry Christmas, Please Don't Call
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 48,933
- Chapters:
- 7/19
- Comments:
- 651
- Kudos:
- 2,513
- Bookmarks:
- 727
- Hits:
- 50,442
Bookmarked by thisismetrying13
18 Jun 2026
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Give Yourself A Reason by groundsquirrel
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
17 Jun 2026
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Summary
Ilya Hollander-Rozanov has been receiving mental health treatment for years. He and Shane have a system, have a plan, have a life together. Depression has other plans.
--
or time spent sitting with Ilya's depression and wondering what a bad episode could look like in a life where he has it more under control. stole the title from Call Your Mom by Noah Kahan
(will be updating tags as i go)
Bookmarked by thisismetrying13
18 Jun 2026
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The Great Divide by FivePips
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
08 Jul 2026
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Summary
When Ilya begins spiraling through depression and mania, the carefully controlled story of Shane and Ilya's "friendship" starts to fall apart. As Ilya's mental health worsens, Shane and the community around them struggles to keep him safe. What follows is a public breakdown, a disappearance, world shattering news, and the crumbling of a public image. Can they navigate not only the depression and escalating mania, but most importantly everything that comes after?
or: A story on how mental illness during depression, mania, treatment, and recovery effects Ilya's life and everyone around him.
Series
- Part 2 of The Last of The Bugs: Hollanov Fic Collection
- Part 1 of I'm Rooting For You(r Downfall)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 83,010
- Chapters:
- 11/11
- Comments:
- 190
- Kudos:
- 440
- Bookmarks:
- 206
- Hits:
- 15,708
Bookmarked by thisismetrying13
16 Jun 2026
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Wake Up Alone, And I’ll Be Forgotten by RavReads
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
13 Jul 2026
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Summary
Yuna
5:26pmIlya, are you not feeling well? The announcers just said you aren’t playing tonight. Do you want us to drop by with some dinner or need any medicine?
Yuna
6:01pmIlya, could you just let us know you are okay?
David
6:35pmWe are going to drop by your house, Ilya, we will be there in fifteen minutes
Yuna
6:57pmShane, call us as soon as the game is over.
Somewhere private.
Bookmarked by thisismetrying13
15 Jun 2026
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i've been seeing ghosts again by Pale_Blue
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
28 Jun 2026
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Summary
Following the move to Ottawa, Ilya is struggling to keep his head above water. The Centaurs seem incapable of winning, his house is still half-unpacked at best, and Shane is two hours away in Montreal. After months of struggling alone, Ilya unexpectedly shows up at the Hollanders’ house one night, terrified of his own thoughts.
In the months that follow, Ilya hits low after low, struggling with his newly-diagnosed depression. David and Yuna do their best to be there for him while distance is still keeping Shane and Ilya apart.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 59,375
- Chapters:
- 48/48
- Comments:
- 794
- Kudos:
- 1,637
- Bookmarks:
- 388
- Hits:
- 65,714
Bookmarked by thisismetrying13
05 Jun 2026
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another day, another struggle by blushgush
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
24 Jun 2026
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Summary
Shane Hollander’s hopes for the NHL were ripped from him by an ACL tear and replaced with doctor prescribed opioids at age 18. Four years later, hockey is a distant memory and his days consist of strange men and chasing a feeling drugs can never seem to provide anymore.
Ilya Rozanov’s family returned home to Russia when his father’s mental state deteriorated and the government wasted no time snatching back his work visa. Ilya stayed behind in that godforsaken city to do the only thing he had ever been able to support his family doing: sell dope.
Ilya sees a lot of sad people. Shane sees a lot of horny men. Neither of them are prepared for what they see in each other, and what it means for the boxes they’ve allowed themselves to be put into.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 115,615
- Chapters:
- 26/26
- Comments:
- 2,745
- Kudos:
- 2,290
- Bookmarks:
- 945
- Hits:
- 71,906
Bookmarked by thisismetrying13
01 Jun 2026
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Tags
Summary
"In sickness and in health," were the wedding vows that Ilya and Shane exchanged almost a year ago, surrounded by the people who loved them. Sooner than they imagined, that promise was put to the test when an accident changed the trajectory of the players' lives.
Shane is forced to retire early. The player sees his world crumble as he loses what he loved most in life, and Ilya is by his side, ready to lift him up, ready to make Shane understand that not all is lost.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 130,733
- Chapters:
- 30/30
- Comments:
- 214
- Kudos:
- 775
- Bookmarks:
- 390
- Hits:
- 54,145
Bookmarked by thisismetrying13
27 May 2026
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Til’ the Fever Broke by Clumsyletters
Fandoms: Hozier - Fandom, Andrew Hozier-Byrne (Musician)
11 Jul 2024
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Summary
Andrew and his bass player’s cousin, Josephine, were together for 8 mainly blissful years before it ended.
No one could have predicted that the couple, painter and musician would ever end. Josephine, an enigmatic if perhaps erratic artist and Andrew, forever brooding musician but the ultimate romantic, had always been considered soulmates, so when it ended- their lives already irrevocably entangled, no one knew how either of them would cope.
The question is if it’ll start again and if it does, will it work the second time around?
(Legit just an intense long burn romance with a nice dose of smut and drama and angssssttttt!! For all the hungry Hozier fans who can’t find any fics bc there is not a lot out here.)
Series
- Part 1 of Til The Fever Broke
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 305,584
- Chapters:
- 75/75
- Comments:
- 686
- Kudos:
- 675
- Bookmarks:
- 37
- Hits:
- 28,045
Bookmarked by thisismetrying13
25 May 2026
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Caught by ShanesPomegranateSeed
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
25 May 2026
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Summary
Ilya's depression medication wasn't working. Again.
Ilya thought were only three options for him. If he was being completely objective, three options. He could continue on as is. He could die. Or he could confess his feelings and detonate a bomb onto his entire life.
Every day Ilya kept picking the first option. Sometimes he chose it multiple times a day. Multiple times a night. He would continue on. He would. He didn’t have any other choices. Unless he died like his mother.
Ilya was caught.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 49,050
- Chapters:
- 22/22
- Comments:
- 138
- Kudos:
- 636
- Bookmarks:
- 130
- Hits:
- 21,672
Bookmarked by thisismetrying13
19 May 2026
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is just ten year plan to fuck by akatomlinson
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
13 May 2026
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Summary
Shane fucking Hollander. Hockey’s Golden Boy. Long-time crush of Ilya Rozanov. Long, looooong time. A decade of being a fucking simp for this man. God, he was in trouble.
It should be pretty much illegal to go from their only contact being at face-off across the ice, to suddenly hosting Shane in his exclusive club—during a fucking event, no less. Ilya’s event.
He would never admit it, but he’s been stealthily trying to get Hollander to show up at his club for years now. Hell, Shane was the whole reason he invested in the club in the first place. Bought a fucking house here. Maybe that was an insane thing to do, but he didn’t care. Ilya was insane. Insane for Shane.
Series
- Part 1 of kitten shane series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 354,916
- Chapters:
- 27/27
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 3,663
- Kudos:
- 7,498
- Bookmarks:
- 3,695
- Hits:
- 581,981
Bookmarked by thisismetrying13
08 May 2026
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call it fate, call it karma by artfullofchaos
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
08 Mar 2026
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Summary
Shane Hollander is ready to climb the publishing ladder and land the job that could completely change his life—even if it means working for the despotic and insufferable Ilya Rozanov.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 70,859
- Chapters:
- 5/5
- Comments:
- 401
- Kudos:
- 4,038
- Bookmarks:
- 1,477
- Hits:
- 105,825
Bookmarked by thisismetrying13
04 May 2026
