DRHPaints
Fandoms
- US Comedians RPF (121)
- Saturday Night Live RPF (91)
- American (US) Actor RPF (77)
- Actor RPF (72)
- Late Night Host RPF (55)
Recent works
-
Tags
Summary
Well, Milo thought, hitching up the plastic bag of paltry possessions and walking to the opposite neighbor’s, who he had yet to meet. Like Mae West said, “Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before."
“Coming!” A deep voice radiated from within. Listening to the heavy footfalls, two thoughts bickered in Milo’s brain.
Please be cute, please be cute, please be cute.
And
In the name of all that is gay and glorious, please let him be blind so he can’t see that I look like a corpse hauled back from hell.
“Hello?”
---
After coming home from the hospital, Milo connects with his depressed and closeted neighbor, Steven.
-
Tags
Summary
She nudges his belly with a knee, smile wicked and innocent and everything in between. "I asked if you wanna fuck."
Barry expected a lecture. Where have you been? Why didn't you come to bed last night? Not....this. "Um..." He scratches his beard. Looks at her for the first time in weeks. Her slumber-puffed eyes, the erupting volcano of her hair. All beautiful, all inaccessible. "I dunno. I'm pretty tired."
"You're always tired," she manages to keep the whine out of her voice. Barely. But her skin screams for his touch, her heart aches for his absence. So close, so gone. "And you never sleep next to me anymore."
Maybe he can't think of how to respond. Maybe he has nothing to say. But Barry shrugs, returning to the game. To the place where his only job is to circle the track. The same, over and over and over. Just trying not to crash.
"You know, you can do anything you want to me."
---
Sally gives Barry permission to use her as he pleases.
-
Tags
Summary
More than anything Barry wants to sleep. After their fight last night, he has no energy for whatever this is. But he knows if he yells, if he shuts down, Sally might run. And he might never, ever find her. So he paints on a smile, features wonked with exhaustion. “Sure, what’s up?”
Sally hushes. Looks around as if someone, as if God, might overhear. “I was wondering if, um… If you could, you know…”
Barry doesn’t know. His nostrils flare. A fist flexes, but he doesn’t push. No use in making her cry. Again.
Finally, her hazel eyes crawl across the floor with a voice softer than a dormouse. “If you could eat me.”
---
Miserable in their desolate trailer life, Sally asks Barry to swallow her sadness.
Series
- Part 1 of BDSM (Babes, Donuts, Snacks, and Meals)🍩
-
Tags
Summary
Over a year of hopping from one emptiness to another. Wigs and sunglasses and baseball caps. Shielding their identities from nobodies. At first, Sally thought it was fun. Maybe even a little sexy. Adapting to a new character every few hundred miles. Stretching her acting muscles to the breaking point as she tried to inhabit Barry’s vision.
But Barry’s sight seemed blurred. While his face healed, his mind fractured. Enemies materializing around every corner. Only to evaporate when he squinted. Or made the mistake of telling Sally. Yes, Sally. The love of his life, who not six months ago kicked him to the curb. Sometimes, late at night with an abyss of country before them, Barry wondered if she was even real. Often reaching across the center console while she slept to trickle fingers through her blonde hair. Just checking. Just in case.
But in this trailer, partially furnished and blank, a painting the artist can’t quite finish, Barry believes Sally is here. Because the Sally of his dreams would never scowl at him like that.
---
Fed up with prairie life, Sally takes out her frustrations on Barry's ass.
-
Old Times, New Love by DRHPaints
Fandoms: Conan O'Brien - Fandom, Conan O'Brien RPF, late night with conan o'brien, US Comedians RPF, Late Night Host RPF, Conan Plays Old Timey Baseball
17 Apr 2024
Tags
Summary
What kind of person applies for an internship at a place like this? Only a week in and already she stuffed mattresses with straw, milked cows, and baked her own bread. But in truth, Nell has always been unique. A woman who yearned for the simplicity of yesteryear. And working with her hands, whether it be churning butter or building fires, brings her not only a sense of accomplishment, but peace.
So here she sits. On a bench that’s anything but ergonomical with outdated undergarments binding her slender body in the June heat. But she doesn’t complain. No. She signed up for this and she intends to complete the challenge. Though, to be fair, she doesn’t love having to use an outhouse.
Near the end of the afternoon, a lanky man skitters around the field, holding a microphone out to people who act as though they’ve never seen such modern technology. Nell heard last night. Rumors that a talk show host would be visiting their quaint little village. And though she recognized his name, never before did she witness the man known as Conan O’Brien.
---
During a remote, Conan meets the mysterious Nell.
Recent series
-
Inpatient Vignettes by DRHPaints
Fandom: Barry (TV 2018), Hot Rod (2007), IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
16 Apr 2022
- Words:
- 4,506
- Works:
- 3
-
What's That Name? Vince Fucking Blight by DRHPaints
Fandom: Saturday Night Live, Saturday Night Live Sketches, SNL - Fandom, Vince Blight - Fandom, what's that name?, What’s That Name?
27 Sep 2020
- Words:
- 9,699
- Works:
- 2
-
Dozerman Gets Me Irrationally Hot by DRHPaints
Fandom: brooklyn 99, Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV), Seth Dozerman - Fandom
02 Nov 2023
- Words:
- 25,723
- Works:
- 5
- Bookmarks:
- 3
-
Kinky Bill One Shots by DRHPaints
Fandom: Actor RPF, American (US) Actor RPF, Bill Hader - Fandom, Bill Hader RPF, Director RPF, IT (Movies - Muschietti), Saturday Night Live RPF, Saturday Night Live Sketches, US Comedians RPF
16 Apr 2024
- Words:
- 113,657
- Works:
- 38
- Bookmarks:
- 5
-
- Words:
- 2,706
- Works:
- 1