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scar on catnip, oh no, what will he do???????? by 5ammmm
Fandoms: Hermitcraft SMP, Video Blogging RPF
07 Sep 2023
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Summary
Catnip and Scar certainly do not mix well.
Or in which Xisuma is not paid enough to deal with this s***. Actually, he isn't even paid at all.
Series
- Part 1 of A Guide on How to Drive Xisuma Insane (Created, Written, and Partially Illustrated by the Hermits)
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Summary
“Alright, so, aside from the fact that this is the stupidest thing I’ve done in my 27 years of living, what other complications could I possibly run into?”
“You say that like you didn’t blow yourself up with an End crystal this morning while trying to get the jump on me.”
“Your input is not appreciated, Impulse. Mumbo?”
“I mean - you’re trying to fly through lava. I think that in and of itself is a complication.”
“Well,” said Grian, eyeing the bottom of the opening where the lava was spilling in,“I think you’re just a nonbeliever.”
“Yeah. Because I am. Because this is a terrible idea.”
~*~
Or, a retelling of that part from Grian's Hermitcraft series where he yeets himself into lava and somehow survives.
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Bookmark Notes:
my guy survived lava and then crashed into a tree. what kind of bird are you
also I swear this happened in season 10 but I might just be whack
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From the Archives by Sixteenthdays
Fandom: 3rd Life | Last Life SMP Series, Empires SMP, Evolution SMP, HCRecap, Hermitcraft SMP, House Builder Gang SMP | HBG SMP, Ivorylore - MCRP, Minecraft Speedrunning - Fandom
24 Jul 2023
Summary
A collection of statements from the archives of the Void Institute.
Cover illustrations by @chrisriin. My series of character studies and AUs exploring different aspects of this series not part of the main story can be found here, so check that out if you're wanting more content!
ALSO, AN OFFICIAL, FULLY-VOICED PODFIC OF THIS SERIES IS NOW CURRENTLY POSTING ON YOUTUBE HERE!!
- Words:
- 129,098
- Works:
- 57
- Bookmarks:
- 1,601
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Bookmark Notes:
Whoop
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the Hurt is well worth the Comfort by orphan_account, TayTayTheHufflepuff
Fandom: 3rd Life | Last Life SMP Series, Double Life SMP, Empires SMP, Hermitcraft SMP, New Life SMP
05 Jul 2023
Summary
The series in which I write a ton of oneshots based off of a 35 word prompt list, all which are the theme of hurt comfort.
Prompt list can be found here.- Words:
- 30,646
- Works:
- 13
- Bookmarks:
- 13
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"We Have Kinktober at Home." Kintober at Home; Generic 31 Days of Hermit Kinks by BlackBerryBrat
Fandoms: Hermitcraft SMP
08 Oct 2025
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Summary
The hermits were certainly stumped when they stumbled upon the luxuriously decorated new shop that had just popped up in the shopping district.
And they were utterly dumbstruck upon entering.Inside the lavish build were three glass prisons, and within each was a glorious sight.
Three men, fully naked, on their knees on velvet cushions, bound with their arms pulled above their heads, slim gags fit into their mouths and silk blindfolds covered their eyes.
Zedaph.
Grian.
Bdubs.
All three looked downright sumptuous.In the centre of the room sat a solitary lectern with an open, unsigned book atop it, which read
“Congratulations! You have found The "Hermit Whores in Hermit Holes".The Rules;
- Any withdrawal of the Toys for playtime is 3 diamonds
- Taking a Toy for the night is an additional 5 diamonds
- Violent or intense play is an additional 5 diamonds
- If multiple buyers are playing, each participant is an additional 1 diamond
- Toys are to be returned to the same state they were when bought, and all store property (gags, blindfolds, bonds, etc.) is to be returned
- Have fun. -
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Summary
Grian has done what was thought to be impossible and Hermits, being the caring beings that they are, suggested (forced) him to take a well-deserved break. Things quickly take a turn and the next thing he knew, he was in a painting session with the server's very own Bob Ross.
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The House is Screaming by Little_Ghoast
Fandoms: Hermitcraft SMP, DCU (Comics), Justice League Action (Cartoon), Phasmophobia (Video Game)
22 Mar 2025
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Summary
John Constantine gets saddled with the groundwork of a burgeoning missing person's case and runs into a gang of paranormal investigators (no not that one) which are more than meets the eye.
This is technically a sequel to Infernal Forgemaster but you don't have to have read that to understand this.
Series
- Part 2 of HC x DC
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Summary
John fails to stop an occultist’s ritual in time. It turns out to be a two-for-one deal on summonings. Good thing they want as much to do with him as he does with them.
Series
- Part 1 of HC x DC
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Allies or Enemies: This will be the death of me by RedRobyn2
Fandom: 3rd Life | Last Life SMP Series, Afterlife SMP, Empires SMP, Hermitcraft SMP, Life Series | 3rd Life SMP Series, MCC, Minecraft Championships (MCC), Origins SMP, Pirates SMP, SOS SMP, WitchCraft SMP
21 Jun 2025
Summary
The past has a way of coming back to haunt us when we least expect it.
The life games have proven that to Grian.
Meanwhile Scott is being weird, remembering things he shouldn't. Maybe the rumours about him weren't so unfounded.
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A series of interconnected stories focussing mainly on Scott Smajor and Grian
Family, friends and secrets- Words:
- 506,322
- Works:
- 15
- Bookmarks:
- 368
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Bookmark Notes:
Read this one for sure
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Summary
If you notice anything, it leads you to notice more and more
The humans talked, throwing bits and things into the passage they called Boatem Hole.
The humans spoke to It, gentle and curious. They kept It company, called It a friend. It didn’t understand, but something beyond walls and walls of frosted glass and impermeable fog whispered pained and haunted behind It’s eyes with a voice that hurt to dwell on, don’t you remember this?- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 102,734
- Chapters:
- 16/20
- Collections:
- 5
- Comments:
- 1,406
- Kudos:
- 4,983
- Bookmarks:
- 1,049
- Hits:
- 116,775
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Bookmark Notes:
In which Grian is an eldritch deity
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Bookmark Notes:
Ch 15
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"You don't have to keep coming back to this place" by SillyGoose_YT
Fandoms: Hermitcraft SMP
30 Jan 2025
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Summary
Impulse has trauma, and... he's never really openly talked about it. Bottling it up isn't a good thing, though.
Just a lot of thought-up-at-three-AM Impulse lore I tried to flesh out.
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Bookmark Notes:
AHSNEIENDJDEKEJWIWKWNEJWOEJQI IMPYYYYYYYYYYY
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Bookmark Notes:
YIPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
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lodestones by setworldspawn
Fandoms: Hermitcraft SMP, 3rd Life | Last Life SMP Series, Minecraft (Video Game)
15 Dec 2024
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Summary
Scar’s never known the avian to be anything but confident, calm, and calculated. But now he’s frightened, swinging a sword around haphazardly as a last-ditch attempt to stay alive, and all it will take is one wrong move or one perfect shot from a pillager, and he’ll die.
And in a way, Scar is terrified too, because he’s never been able to land a shot on the avian before, or get close enough to do any damage, but whatever got to him first did much more than just a little prick from an arrow. Pillagers are scary in their own right, but Scar has a feeling that it wasn’t just pillagers or ravagers that did this.
Something is very wrong.
or, Scar saves the city’s most dangerous criminal, makes him his roommate, falls in love with him, and then also saves the world with him. In that order, with various setbacks along the way.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 107,764
- Chapters:
- 13/30
- Comments:
- 335
- Kudos:
- 1,656
- Bookmarks:
- 262
- Hits:
- 38,972
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Bookmark Notes:
lodestones
setworldspawn
Summary:
Scar’s never known the avian to be anything but confident, calm, and calculated. But now he’s frightened, swinging a sword around haphazardly as a last-ditch attempt to stay alive, and all it will take is one wrong move or one perfect shot from a pillager, and he’ll die.
And in a way, Scar is terrified too, because he’s never been able to land a shot on the avian before, or get close enough to do any damage, but whatever got to him first did much more than just a little prick from an arrow. Pillagers are scary in their own right, but Scar has a feeling that it wasn’t just pillagers or ravagers that did this.
Something is very wrong.
or, Scar saves the city’s most dangerous criminal, makes him his roommate, falls in love with him, and then also saves the world with him. In that order, with various setbacks along the way.
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Bookmark Notes:
13/30
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a jumbo secret by SamGoesBam
Fandoms: Hermitcraft SMP, Life Series | 3rd Life SMP Series
10 Oct 2025
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Summary
Grian has been concerned about the way Mumbo's mentor, Guise, had been treating him in training. He brings it to the attention of the head of heroes, Impulse.
Or,
Hero AU where waffle duo are trainees and Mumbo's mentor sucks.
Whumptober prompt: Secret
Series
- Part 10 of Hermit/Traffic Whumptober 2025
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,753
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 1
- Kudos:
- 68
- Bookmarks:
- 3
- Hits:
- 258
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Summary
No one ever promised Technoblade safety before.
Plenty of people have offered him plenty of things, but they were always presented as deals. Techno gives himself to them in exchange for something: renown, his life, an escape route off a dying planet. It all seems the same after enough time, and this latest server is no different. The revolution that was supposed to come of it never did.
Techno is tired and done with it all. Frankly, he doesn't even care if there's an age minimum for retiring. If he wants safety, he obviously has to make it for himself.
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Techno has seen too much, and done far more, in his very short life. When he lands on Hermitcraft by accident, he swears it'll be nothing more than a bump on his road away from people and the trouble they bring.
But the Hermits may just have something more to offer him, something no one else ever could...
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 113,489
- Chapters:
- 19/21
- Collections:
- 5
- Comments:
- 349
- Kudos:
- 1,432
- Bookmarks:
- 281
- Hits:
- 35,137
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19
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Ch19
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Trying Something New (Don’t Make Me Miss You) by BluetBluish for ik_rainydayss
Fandoms: Hermitcraft SMP, Life Series | 3rd Life SMP Series
08 Sep 2025
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Summary
Prompt: coffee shop au but medieval/fantasy/dnd so it's actually tavern au
Grian works at the tavern for one reason: to make money.
He doesn’t need anything else.
OR
Gem is concerned for Grian, so she tricks him into staying late at the tavern and meeting her friends.
Series
- Part 14 of Fic Fight 2025
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,437
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 21
- Kudos:
- 72
- Bookmarks:
- 8
- Hits:
- 377
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Bookmark Notes:
Cuties & i love me some light angst, grian struggling in life is just so oooughhhh 💔😭
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unstoppable force versus immoveable object by RedsNight
Fandom: 3rd Life | Last Life SMP Series, Hermitcraft SMP, Vault Hunters SMP
12 Oct 2025
Summary
Informally the "seepo eefo" series; a collection of ethoslab-centric fics focusing on etho as a queer disabled person and their relationships w/the people around them.
- Words:
- 45,739
- Works:
- 24
- Bookmarks:
- 54
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Through the Harshest Weather by Vivid_Comet
Fandoms: Life Series | 3rd Life SMP Series, Hermitcraft SMP, Phasmophobia (Video Game)
11 Oct 2025
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Summary
Gem is nervous.
She sits in her car in the Hermitcraft parking lot, clutching her satchel with both hands where it rests in her lap. She digs her fingers into it hard enough to indent the leather in an attempt to steady her shaking hands. It doesn’t work, and it doesn’t help, but she pretends it does.
When Xisuma approached her the day after Impulse Esvee, the most respected ghost hunter at Hermitcraft, sent her an email, Gem couldn’t help but think that it was a joke.
Or, Gemini Tay joins the group. She never expected it to be her job to pick up everyone’s broken pieces.
Series
- Part 4 of To Be Haunted (GIGGS Phasmo AU)
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Bookmark Notes:
Gem!! Yay!
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Bookmark Notes:
they got ISSUES man. good thing gem is here for real for real
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Summary
My Ranchers Past Life AU!
- Words:
- 5,264
- Works:
- 3
- Bookmarks:
- 4
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Bestest Friends by Amethystfairy1
Fandoms: Hermitcraft SMP, 3rd Life | Last Life SMP Series, Empires SMP
27 Sep 2023
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Summary
Pearl had been running solo in the over-city for years now. Which was fine. She didn't mind being alone. Besides, she had her twin brother and her cousin as well, but making friends as an illegal hybrid isn't easy. She's managed just fine. Even when she'd left to live up above, she'd always made the time to visit the under-city, but those times were growing farther apart. Because Gem and Impulse had never been to the over-city. When their birthday rolls around she encourages her brother to go enjoy his first birthday with a boyfriend and let Scar spoil him rotten.
So what if she can't make the trip to spend her birthday, as she has every year, with her dearest friends?
She was a grown-ass woman. Something as silly as autumnal soup and role-playing card games wasn't going to break her.
But maybe the lack of them could.{In which Pearl breaks down while missing her birthday traditions, Gem makes the best soup in the under-city, Impulse beats back his nerves with a stick, and at the end of the day it's the three of them doing the same things as always, even if they aren't necessarily in the same place.}
{Whumptober 2023 - 20: Found Family}
Series
- Part 29 of Through the Sky-Blue Cracks {Hot Guy/Cute Guy Superhero/Hybrid AU}
- Part 20 of Amethyst's Whumptober-ish 2023
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Bookmark Notes:
i love Soup Group <33
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Swim Meet-Cute by AmberishRose
Fandoms: Hermitcraft SMP, Life Series | 3rd Life SMP Series
15 Sep 2025
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Summary
When Grian let his sister talk him into dropping off her lab partner's forgotten textbook, he never coukd have imagined this would be the result.
Series
- Part 1 of The Home You Build